Page 43 of 7 Dirty Lies

She snorted.“Understatement.”

Considering she answered my call in the middle of the night, her time, she had a point.She and her husband Adam were currently in Azerbaijan, sleeping in a castle ahead of the next Formula 1GrandPrix.

“We’ve had a ridiculous life and yet,” I sighed, “and yetthisseemsinsane.”

“What?”she was half asleep and yawning.“The falling for a hottie part?Get over it.You totally deserve ahottie.”

“No.The fact I met him onvacation.”

“I met Adam onvacation.”

TechnicallyAdamwas on vacation and Liz was just working.“You had two whole weeks together before you started leaping into talking aboutfeelings.”

That made her laugh.“I was an emotionally stunted, exploited, extorted ex-celebrity in hiding.Two weeks for me is the equivalent of two hours for everyone else.Besides now that I have the benefit of retrospect, I can tell you I probably knew Adam was perfect after two minutes and I was absolutely head over heels for him after two days, I just wasn’t capable of recognizing any of those emotions untillater.”

My life was weird, but Liz’s was a thousand times weirder.She shielded me from a lot of what our parents did.And even though I knew the parties were raging in our living rooms I didn’t understand that there were drugs and sex happening all over the house because Liz kept ushidden.

She was the adult when our parents couldn’t manage to beresponsible.

“He doesn’t know,” Iwhispered.

The line fell silent and I knew I didn’t need toexplain.

“Think of it this way, Lil.You found one of the few people on this planet who don’t have their noses up our asses.This may be the only time you get to tell your story in your own way...but don’t wait too long.People will talk and you want him to hear itfromyou.”

She was right.I knew she was right, but it didn’t make it any easier to find the words.“How did you tell Adam?”It was probably simpler for her considering Adam’s family was even more in the public eye than ours was, especially since his lifetime-senator grandfather had been elected president three years earlier.If anyone was going to understand a weird public life, it was a guy whose family was considered politicalroyalty.

I heard sheets rustling and the rumbly voice of my brother-in-law.“Hey Lil.Love you,” hemumbled.

Liz hushed him.“Hold on.I’m going out to the couch.”There was more rustling and the soft click ofadoor.

“I’m sorry I’ve got you up in the middle of thenight.”

But she brushed me right off.“Whatever.We have no schedule.I just want him to get a good night of sleep.Tomorrow is qualifying and he needs his wholebrain.”

A couple of years ago Adam took on his own new Formula 1 team under the umbrella of his old team.Instead of working on the engineering staff he was now the head of the whole team and in direct competition with his old team.It was a weird dynamic I didn’t totally understand but they told me it had something to do with innovation and pushingdesign.

Whatever.

“Adam knew exactly who I was as soon as I told him,” she said quickly.“But I was lucky.He knew my story but he didn’t make assumptions.He waited patiently while I told him what I could.It took awhile.”

Would Colt give me the same courtesy?Given the fact we were already on rocky ground, I had my doubts.Besides, he had that whole protective vibe going and I had a feeling if I told him about the parties, the money, and the scams he’d go into overdrive and blast right past caring and into angrymonstermode.

Well, that was if he caredatall.

And I was pretty sure under his hurt he cared about me just as much as I caredabouthim.

“Where do I even start?”I plopped back onto my bed and stared up at the ceiling.Had Maureen O’Hara done the same thing?Probably not.She was pretty bad ass.Staring at ceilings would have beenbeneathher.

“What are you most afraid of him finding out?”Lizasked.

“Everything.”

She laughed.“Yeah.You’ve got to get over that.You could have run away and changed your name like me but you didn’t.You wanted to stay and conquer.And I know you will.You have the strength that Ididn’t.”

It always made me angry when she said stuff like that.Elizabeth was hands down the strongest person I’d ever met.She wasn’t weak for walking away from our family, she was smart.She set her boundary and she stoodbehindit.

If that wasn’t strength I didn’t knowwhatwas.