Page 92 of Tempt

We came to a stop, but neither of us moved. It was as if our arms were locked around each other and there was no key. After a few moments Theo sighed and looked over at Joe and Seth. His voice was low and rough. “You keep her safe.” His arms tightened around me even more.

“We will, sir,” Joe said, as if no other option had ever occurred to him.

“I’ll kill you myself if you don’t.”

I froze. Not because of the words themselves, but because of the force and emotion behind them. Theo meant exactly what he said—if anything happened to me, he’d kill them and everyone responsible.

Both men gave a stern, “Yes, sir.” It left no doubt that I was in safe hands…except that it wasn’t where I should be.Theowas safe.Hewas my protection. I didn’t want to be anywhere else, but I had agreed to go, so I was going to go. I held on tighter.

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing my forehead, and then tilting my head up for a deep, almost inappropriate kiss (not that I cared if everyone saw us.) I actually kind of liked it. There was no question that Theo was mine.

I put my hands on either side of his face and looked straight into his eyes so that I had his full attention. “I love you, too. Come back to me.” I felt like if I didn’t say it one more time, drive it home, that Theo might go back on his promise.

He nodded quickly, a determination flashing through his eyes. “I will.” And then he stepped away, letting Seth and Joe take up their positions on either side of me as they led me away.

I glanced back just before I stepped into the stairwell. Theo raised his chin, giving me one last shot of confidence before I left.

He loved me.

And I loved him.

I just hoped it was enough to save him from himself.

Chapter 33

Iheard from Theo a couple of times that week. One was a hastily scrawled note hand delivered to me by Joe when he dropped me off at my flat.

Have fun. I’m sorry I have to miss it.

That note contained nine words, but said so much more. He cared enough to send it. He knew what was going on in my life even though he was completely focused on his.

But there was noI love youorI miss you. There was still a cold barrier separating him from me and I hated it.

Luis, James, and Ava came over for Thanksgiving dinner, so did Nicki and Higgins, and it was almost comical to see us all squeezed in there together along with Elizabeth, Adam, and Lily. We ate off of disposable plates and drank out of plastic cups. It was more of a party than a traditional sit-down feast. Which was fine since really, it suited the little family I was building in London better. We still covered all the bases: time with those I cared about most, drinking, laughing, and eating until we had to loosen our pants.

James kept making not-so-subtle passes at Lily, who was surprisingly receptive to my smooth-talking friend. She was as much a sucker for the accent as I was, even if James’ was much more consistent and refined than Theo’s. His eyes kept drinking in her long athletic lines and blonde hair. (She and Elizabeth had the same build, but different color hair and eyes. They looked alike, but different. It was weird.) And she kept biting her lips and staring at his ass when he wasn’t looking.

I wasn’t sure if it was lust or puppy love, though, because they both started giggling like teenagers just before he left.

Since it was a Thursday my work friends excused themselves early, but the rest of us kept the party rolling for several more hours. I was in the kitchen cleaning up the last of the food containers when Higgins strolled in and opened the fridge for a fresh beer.

“How’re you holding up?” he asked with a sideways look.

I shrugged. “Not very well. This is helping though.”

He popped the top off the bottle and leaned back against the counter as laughter broke out in the living room. They were playing Heads Up and having more fun making fun of each other than anything else.

“You saw him?”

I nodded. “Yeah, but he’s a million miles away from me. I know this is intense and I’m not involved in any of it, but this distance…it’s killing me. I just want to be there for him and he won’t let me anywhere near him.”

Higgins took a long swig of his beer, then studied the label for a few moments. “He’s just trying to be smart, and love? It makes you stupid. Really fucking stupid.”

The best thing that ever happened to me was the thing that hurt the most. His love for me was his weakness.

Fuckitall—I was going to have to trademark that by the time this was done. It was becoming my silent mantra.

Fuckitall: take it with a spoonful of sugar when your boyfriend’s life is in the shitter.

---