Page 27 of Kiss Me, Darling

I didn’t just miss Scott anymore. Oh no. Ineededhim now. Desperately. I was on fire and knew from all the experiences in my adult life that there was only one man who could elicit such a passionate response from me.

Except he wasn’t even here. He was still with Chris. Separated. Not together.

Alone.

Alone with my smokin’ hot thoughts and nowhere to release them.

7

The old is new again

Scott

“What advice would you give young pitchers inspired by your World Series victories?” A reporter sat across from Chris asking questions.

They were on the field at Sunshine Stadium doing interviews leading up to a pitchers award ceremony where my brother was slated to take home a few trophies for his big year.

I came along to keep him company. And I was helpfully tossing sunflower seeds at him as he answered questions. He kept batting them away, but not breaking character. He had on that professional smile to match his smart blue suit.

Mantas blue to be exact.

I had to admit my little brother had style. I was proud of him. Yeah he’s like, the best pitcher in the world, but he’s also got a look all his own, he’s good to Olivia, and he and Linc are just the best together. I used to be jealous of how clearly he saw his path in life, but now I simply admired it because I now had the same vision for myself. I knew who I wanted to be, who I wanted to share my life with, and how I wanted to spend my days.

And precisely how to annoy him. I tossed a single seed and watched with delight as it got stuck in his collar. He also hadn’t noticed the single seed in his shoe. Again. This small game was fun.

Oh sure, the big stunts were a blast. There was always the big realization, the yelling, the promises of retribution. It was a high. But there was something to be said for patience. For doing something just annoying enough to be bothersome, but not annoying enough for the victim to realize they were a victim. The buildup would be slow but the eventual payoff would be well worth it.

Kind of like making things right with Lucy. Iwantedto say I was sorry, promise to be a happy, put-together human that would never hurt her, and just be together again. But there was value in showing her first. In demonstrating my changes and allowing us to properly heal.

And when we finally, officially got back together? I expected fireworks. Fourth of July at a Disney park levels of explosions.

“Well, I’ve always had an amazing support system,” Chris said as he gestured at me, holding another sunflower seed, ready to launch. I froze and smiled. Chris laughed. “My brother is here with me today.”

The reporter also laughed. “And giving you a hard time, I see.”

Chris shook out his collar and blazer. “Yeah, we have a long running sunflower seed war. It goes back to my first game in the majors and has never ended.”

I tossed the seed. It arched through the air and landed in his hair.Bingo!

“Knowing that no matter what, win or lose, you have people back home who like you just because they like you, really makes all the difference,” Chris finished.

“And this year that home group expanded. Do you want to talk about that?” The reporter carefully asked.

“Oh absolutely.” Chris came to life. “My parents and my brothers have always had my back, but my fiancee, Olivia, is the one who’s rooting for me at every game, the one I go home to each night.”

Yeah.His words really sank in. So much so that I didn’t hit him with another sunflower seed. Instead I actually popped one in my mouth and sucked on the salty exterior before cracking the shell open and eating the delicious seed. My family always had my back, even when I was a stupid, spoiled brat. They let me make my mistakes (after advising me against it) and then picked me up, dusted me off, and gave me a hug.

There was no reason to think they hated me, and yet I acted like they did. I kept them all at arms length. Phone calls and emails and random visits, but never anything deeper. That was what I did differently this summer. I let them in. Just a little. It got easier every day.

But it was Lucy who was with me through thick and thin these last few years. It was Lucy who I went to when I was lost, and Lucy who I wanted to go home to each night.

I took Chris to his hotel. The ceremony would go late and the booze would be flowing, so he and Olivia smartly reserved a hotel room near the event. Linc was staying with his dad. She’d be here any minute.

“Tell Grandma we love her.” He hugged me goodbye.

“Will do. And hey, thanks for letting me live in your house all summer.”

He kept his hands on my shoulders, then patted my cheek with his throwing hand. “It’s good to have you back. I missed you big brother. Therealyou, not the smart ass.”

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