Page 45 of Kiss Me, Darling

After the awkwardend of the poker game we decided to walk home. It was dark, hot, and humid. What was new? The crickets chirped happily away and in the near distance I could hear the lulling sound of waves lapping up on the beach.

What I did not expect was to come face to face with a possum.

It froze right in front of me, near the end of the fence between our driveways. His eyes shone back at our phone flashlights, his long, skinny tail on the ground behind him.

“It’s Asshole!” Scott hissed. Then he put his hand in front of me and pushed us back. “He’s nasty. I mean it.”

“What do we do?” I was not, how do I put it? I was not an outdoorsy girl. I didn’t even go outside at night all that often. The beach was pretty much the long and short of my time outside.

“Stay away from him.”

“Yeah, I figured that part out!”

Then Asshole hissed at us. I shrieked, which only made the possum hiss some more. He turned, his eyes flashed in the light, and then he sauntered into the bushes.

“Let’s go while we can.” Scott grabbed my elbow and rushed us around the fence, through the walking gate...where we promptly found yet another creature. This one looked like a dinosaur with its armored plating. It had a long pointy nose and stubby feet.

“What the hell is that?”

“Asshole’s best friend. It’s an armadillo.” As Scott spoke it curled into a ball.

We rushed past it. “You haven’t named the armadillo?”

“Asshole Two.”

Made sense. “What’s next? Will mummies start marching out of the darkness next? Zombies?”

“Don’t give the island any ideas. It has plenty already.” We rushed up the front steps and inside. “We’re back!”

Esther poked her head out. “Hey you two. Back for the night?”

“Yep. As long as it's okay.”

“Of course. And just so you know, we added two guards to this house since it seems to be the hot spot. There will always be two of us on watch at all times. Joe is getting ready to walk the perimeter. Volk and Mariah are currently asleep. They’ll be on watch when you wake up.”

I was a little relieved to know there were extra eyes on the property. “Watch out for Asshole and Asshole Two. They just surprised us outside.”

Joe didn’t look too happy. “I want you both to know just how motivated I am to catch this stalker. If I never see an armadillo or possum ever again, it will be too soon.” Then he ducked outside.

Poor guy.

“Do you need anything, Esther?”

“No I’m good. But thank you. Enjoy your night.”

We made a quick pasta dinner then headed upstairs to be alone. It was a good thing we did because the next twenty-four hours were exhausting...and it all started with an iguana named Charlie.

11

Just one of the Assholes

Scott

It’s easy to under-appreciate the little things. Like the simple vulnerability of someone allowing you to watch them undress.

And I’m not talking about a sexy striptease. I’m talking about a normal end of the day removing of the clothes. I always enjoyed watching Lucy change from work clothes to “comfy clothes” when she got home from the office. Any chance to see her wiggle, a glimpse of bare breast or ass, or even fully naked, was worth taking. But trulyappreciatingthe why of it all was another matter. If you’re getting naked in front of someone, that means you trust them with your entire body. It means you feel safe and at ease with them.

I hadn’t undressed in front of anyone, and I certainly hadn’t seen anyone undress, in months. I hadn’t been that vulnerable with anyone and I hadn’t been allowed into that safe space with Lucy.

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