Page 72 of Bastard

“I never saw kids in my life. Not even in my twenties when my friends all got married and started having them. It just…wasn’t for me. But this? I like this quite a lot. I get to enjoy the smiles and cuddles, but give her back.”

That was definitely the advantage for grandparents. All the fun, none of the fuss.

“Daddy!” Nina shrieked, bolting across the pool deck, little curls flying. She threw herself into Jace’s arms. He scooped her up, spun her around, and then held her like a baby while he showered her with kisses and tickles. When she was breathless he set her down and she took his hand, leading him over to me with bouncing steps. “Now do Mommy!”

Jace smirked and winked at the innocent innuendo, then dropped the back of my lounge chair and showered me with kisses too. I may have squealed.

“Hello Gorgeous.”

“Hey there, handsome. How did it go?”

The stress of the last few days showed. “As expected. His sentence has been upheld.” Todd rarely factored into our everyday lives, but his latest appeal was heard this week. Jace withdrew even though he knew there was no chance of success on Todd’s part.

The only loose end in our lives was Randall Cork. But after three years he was found dead in the Hudson River. We suspected it was the final revenge of the Feyereisen brothers, but I was fairly certain we’d never know for sure, kind of like a lot of other mysterious deaths in my family.

“How are the boys?”

“Excited to see you tonight. We’re still on?”

“You better be,” Georgia huffed behind him. “I don’t need any nosy parents around, spoiling my grandmother time.”

“I’ve been looking forward to it!” I pushed back up to sitting, feeling a little claustrophobic with everyone around me like this. “Hazel and Yara should be here any minute.”

Right on time, the doorbell rang. Nina took off shrieking again. “They’re here! They’re here! They’re here!” She managed to speed past Jace and beat him to the door.

By the time I caught up, Nina was hugging Neil. They were only three months apart and, to my pure delight, as close as Jace and I ever were.

Hazel shook her head. “I’m getting a much clearer picture on what you two were like as kids.” We all hugged in different combinations while Nina dragged Neil off to her playroom.

“Your room is ready.” I hugged my best friend a second time. “Let me know if you need anything.”

Hazel rolled her eyes. “I need a night out with my friends! All work and no play make Hazel a dull girl.”

“It’s true.” Yara made a face. It showed both frustration and love. It looked a lot like Jace these days.

“Well then go get dressed,” Georgia tutted at us all. “And leave me to my grandbabies!”

Georgia folded Hazel and Yara right into our new family and considered Neil hers as well. Both couples had their own rooms in our house and Neil never left Nina’s side, so he’d sleep in her room tonight. One day we’d have to make him sleep in his room, but that would be years from now.

Years felt like lifetimes these days. So much happened month to month, year to year. I always expected another curveball even if it was illogical. Planning for the future was something I rarely did and only in broad strokes. It was probably the one thing Jace and I fought about most. I didn’t blame him. I understood his frustration. But I wasn’t ready to feel disappointment when my plans were shattered by change. Maybe one day I’d be able to handle it again, but that day wasn’t today.

Georgia ran off after the kids, smiling from ear to ear. It reminded me of Mom. She loved me so much—loved being a mother. My childhood would never have been like this with Georgia and Bernard though. Even if I’d survived the Fourth of July attack Bernard planned, Georgia wouldn’t have smiled and there would have been no joy. In the end, we both got to experience love and happiness, just not as mother and daughter.

Despite everything, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Jace wrapped an arm around my waist. “Come on, love. We’re officially off duty for the next twenty-four hours.” He pressed a kiss to my temple before nudging me toward the bedroom.

He shut the door and yanked his tie free, began unbuttoning his dress shirt. But instead of relief that the day was over and nothing had changed, his gaze remained unfocused, his jaw flexed and released. I dropped my clothes in the dirty laundry and got zero reaction from my normally obsessive husband.

I needed to get Jace out of his head. So I went into the bathroom and started the shower before coming back to find him shirtless and staring out the window.

Now don’t get me wrong. This is pretty much my ideal sight in the bedroom. Jace still had a rockin’ bod and there was something incredibly hot about slacks hanging from his hips. So I gave myself the treat of staring at him for a solid fifteen, maybe twenty seconds, before I went to him and slid my fingers over the Devil’s Wrath tattoo he refused to remove. He said it was part of him and erasing it wouldn’t change anything.

He started, then huffed when he realized it was just me. “Hey Gorgeous. Sorry. I’m a little zoned out still.”

He didn’t even notice that I was tracing the words The Price is Your Soul. “Where are you?”

“Here.” He captured my hand and pressed my palm flat against the tattoo. “Thinking about everything that brought us to this moment. Everything it cost. Except…except I think I’ve realized I don’t think of it that way anymore.”

---