Page 16 of Made

“Indeed. Nothing the enforcer couldn’t handle though.”

“That is true,” I said, while remembering the Norse god Tyr and his horse taking flight and coming straight for my face. Even though Keir’s lunge into the air didn’t make contact with Tyr, my hubby would’ve knocked him off course so that contact with the teeth my mother paid to straighten remained intact. “Isthere anything I should do or not do to help them through their, um, transition?”

“Hmm,” he said while happily chewing a second muffin. “I know I said it can be amusing, but don’t laugh at them. They’re sensitive, and it’s embarrassing to be temporarily trapped mid-shift.”

“I can see that. Of course I won’t.” I made a mental note to pass that along to Keir.

“That settled, I thought I should mention that there is a newer model of your auto available if you’d like to upgrade.”

My head jerked toward Lochlan so fast that he jumped a little. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Aisling’s tail thump on the floor. So, my pups’ mum had a sense of humor.

“What do you mean?” I demanded, but when he opened his mouth to respond, I shook my head and, quick as Jack Robinson, I rose and closed my palm over his mouth to ensure silence. “Shhhh! He’ll hear you!”

I pulled Lochlan to his feet, grabbed the sleeve of his tweedy jacket at the elbow, and ushered him out the front door.

Lochlan looked over his shoulder. “Why exactly do I find myself suddenly standing on your porch? Is this what’s known as the ‘bum’s rush’? It’s an automobile, Magistrate. You must know it has no feelings. Or gender, I might add.”

With the absolute best of intentions, or so I choose to believe, Lochlan stopped by to ask if I’d likea new car. Based on the forced exit I provided, he was getting the idea that my answer was a hard no.

“This I know, Clerk. Comparing Romeo to many of magic kind’s species, he could be held up as an example of kindness, consideration, reliability, and loyalty. Did you know he practically committed suicide trying to rescue me from a werewolf? As it turned out, there was no danger. But I had no way of knowing that in the moment. If not for my daughter, Romeo would’ve been in repair for a year!”

Lochlan softened his tone. “Rita. If you honestly don’t know that automobiles cannot commit suicide, I shall be most concerned for your mental stability.”

“What do you know about it?” I narrowed my eyes. “You don’t even own a car. Much less one like Romeo. How could you possibly suggest something as callous and soulless as trading him in?”

Undeterred by the soulless comment, Lochlan continued without missing a beat. “Well, I happened to see an ad for new models on the same day I’d noticed room in the budget for magistrate benefits.”

I blinked twice as I experienced the mental slide into “sidetracked”. “There’s a budget for benefits? Why am I just now hearing about this?”

“Perhaps partly because your daughter, the Irish Queen, has practically limitless power to give you anything. Still, I like to think of myself as your benefactor as much as your solicitor. When I see an opportunity to be of service, I pride myself on not letting grass grow under my feet.”

My anger melted away instantly. “Well. Thank you. It was very nice of you to make the offer. But you see, I’ve… bonded with Romeo. I’d sooner trade Keir for one of his brothers. Wait. I didn’t mean that.” I shook my head. “Horrible analogy. And completely untrue. But you know what I mean.”

“No. I do not.”

I continued my rant without caring whether he knew what I meant or not. “And I know my daughter is Irish Queen. It doesn’t need to be spelled out every time you mention her name.” That was a little short and quibbly, but I was on a roll.

“Noted. Simply abiding by protocol, you understand.”

“I do understand. You’re hereby freed of the need to refer to protocol when speaking to me.”

“Thank you, I suppose.” He paused for a moment in thought. “I believe I do know what you mean about having developed a liking for this particular automobile. I have a pencil sharpener I wouldn’t trade for the world. But you must know you’ll get a new car at some point. You won’t keep, ah, Romeo for the rest of your life.”

“Why not?”

“Frankly, my dear, we don’t know how long you’ll live, but we do know your life expectancy has been increased significantly. Magistrates typically live eight times longer than humans. But you’re different because you’re also married to a fae creature. We won’t know how that turns out until the turn is outed. But certainly you will outlast anything mechanical.”

“That’s a surprisingly faulty assumption, Clerk. If something goes wrong with Romeo, we’ll fix it. Like you said, my daughter can do anything. Including making my car good as new.”

I turned when Keir opened the front door and stepped onto the porch.

“You’re home!” I said, like it was a surprise.

“I am. What’s going on out here?” he asked.

“I was…” Lochlan began.

“Shhhh,” I said, motioning for Keir to come closer. Lowering my voice to a whisper, I told Lochlan, “Not so loud.” I turned to Keir and said in a hushed tone, “He came by to see if I might want to trade Romeo in on a newer model.”

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