Page 9 of Save Me

“No!” He grins back, a fake shocked look on his face. “How did you manage that?”

I laugh but instead of the flippant answer I’m sure he’s expecting, I’m suddenly overcome by the need to be honest with him. “Therapy. Lots of it, actually. I’m still not a nice person, but I might go far enough to say I’m nicer than I was. Happier, too.”

“You were always a nice person, Ashley; you just hid it well. But I’m glad you’re happier. You deserve it.”

I shrug and glance out the side window, delighted but also momentarily overwhelmed by how vulnerable his words make me feel. “Well, now some of that’s on the outside, and people seem to respond better.” I have to change the subject. I’m getting way too close to crying again. I take a long drink of water and it helps. What I really need is some sleep. “I’ll miss the clothing the most.” At Jamie’s chuckle, I grin, able to take a step back from the emotional cliff. “Hey, don’t laugh! I have some wonderful pieces that I really love.” I take another breath. “At least I still have these.” I knock my boots together. “They’re my favorite.”

Jamie glances over and nods. “I love Docs too. Mostly for work. I wear my Tims in the woods though.” His words are so sincere that it’s not awkward that we’re discussing boots like it’s important. “You know, we might be able to salvage some things from your apartment. I’ll call the office from the house, see if we can figure out what the next move is.” He frowns and his eyes are full of concern. “Normally witness protection is one-and-done. If you break the rules, it’s on you.” My stomach sinks, but I nod, ready to pay the price for my actions. I startle when Jamie reaches over and squeezes my thigh. “It might be okay, though. I have some friends at work who’ll help. They may not be able to set you up quite so nicely, but they should be able to get you a new identity.”

I glance at Jamie, but he doesn’t seem to be fazed by the contact, or in any hurry to move his hand. “Well, you can contact my assistant at the gallery. He’s one of my friends. He would pack a few of the more important things for me and hold on to them until they can be sent along. If that’s allowed.”

Jamie nods and gives me a small smile. “We’ll see how it goes. Okay? But no promises.”

He withdraws his hand, and I immediately miss the contact. Thank gods the vehicle has bucket seats, or I’d be tempted to do something foolish like slide over and cuddle up against him. I nod instead, acknowledging his words. “No promises.” I finally start to relax, and my lack of sleep catches up with me. I lean my forehead against the side window and watch the forest pass, letting my mind drift. The view is beautiful, but there really isn’t much variety, and I wonder what kind of safehouse would be way out here. Perhaps it’s for very sensitive cases, or the closest one that wasn’t being utilized, although that seems unlikely. I consider a nap as the car gently jostles me back and forth and my sleepy mind ponders a question I’ve wondered about. “Jamie?”

“Mmm?”

I shuffle around so I’m facing him, my temple pressed against the headrest and my leg tucked up under my body, careful to keep my knee away from the gearshift. I stare at his profile, so strong and handsome, memorizing his features for that moment when we have to say goodbye again, this time permanently. “Is it usual to give witnesses your business card?”

“What?” Jamie glances over at me and grins, and my breath catches. I’m still surprised by how easily he smiles now. He seems lighter, like a burden’s been lifted, and I wonder what’s changed.

“That’s how I reached you. The business card you gave me that last day of the trial. Is that normal procedure?” The sweetest pink blush creeps up his neck and cheeks, and I want to laugh and crawl into his lap and kiss away his adorable embarrassment. Instead, I watch him hesitate. “You don’t need to tell me. It’s alright. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

As if he’s finally worked up the courage, he blurts out an answer. “No.”

What? I sit up. “I beg your pardon?”

“No. It’s not usual.” Jamie pauses and his blush deepens. I can tell he’s choosing his words carefully. “When a witness is relocated, they are assigned a deputy marshal in that city who handles their case. Your go-to contact when you got into trouble should have been whoever that is. Having more than one contact option could lead to witness confusion about which number to call in a crisis. So giving you my card was against protocol. I could have been fired for doing it. I still could be.” Jamie is intently concentrating on the road, very purposely not looking at me.

I slump back against the leather seat. “Oh.” I’m utterly confused. “Fired?” None of it makes sense. “Then why did you do it?”

Jamie sighs, clearly exasperated. “In case you needed me, Ashley! Which you ultimately did, so I’m glad I risked it.”

“Oh.” I bristle as realization dawns. Not only have I endangered myself, I’ve now endangered Jamie,andcreated a situation where he might lose his job because of my actions. I turn in my seat and face the front window, posture perfect, feet flat on the floor. Heat washes over my face, and the blood rushes through my ears, utter mortification settling into my chest. Once again I’ve shown him how incompetent I am at functioning on my own.

“Ashley.”

I cut off whatever he’s about to say. “I’m not sorry I tried to see Oliver, and given the same situation, I’d do it again.” I might think twice about calling Jamie, though. If anything happens to him because of me… gods, I’m an idiot. I want to be out of the car, as far away from him as I can get, but unless I’m willing to toss myself out of a moving vehicle, that’s not possible. I grit my teeth and glare out the side window, ignoring his further attempts to engage me in conversation until he finally gives up.

We ride for another half hour in silence before we pull off the one-lane road and meander down what looks like a dirt driveway of sorts. I wonder if the trip will ever end when we suddenly burst through the trees. My jaw drops open. In front of us is a tidy two-story log house, with a big wraparound porch, two large chimneys, dormer windows, and a small grassy area abutting a big lake. It’s rustic and cozy and definitely nothing like what I had been imagining. “Oh! It’s lovely.”

Jamie snorts. “Not what you were expecting?”

“No.” I open the car door when he finally brings the vehicle to a stop next to the house. “To be honest, no. I thought we’d end up in some one-room hunting cabin with no running water or electricity.” I slide out of the seat and walk around the door to get a better look at the place.

“Well…” I whip around and glare accusingly at Jamie, who defensively holds up his hands. “There’s running water.” I huff out a breath and relax slightly, though the vision of needing to use an outhouse is burned into my brain. That would not have been a pleasant discussion.

“But no electricity?” My phone would have eventually been useless, anyway.

“Well, very limited electricity. Da wanted us to come out here and talk to each other, spend time playing board games, and reading, and fishing, and getting away from the city. This is his place to escape and recharge.” Jamie blushes and rubs his neck. “Sorry, I probably should have warned you before we got here.”

I sniff audibly and turn toward the house, ignoring the fact that I’d given him no opening to have such a discussion. “This is your family’s cabin? House? Place? When was the last time anyone was here?”

“Yeah, and no idea. Not too long ago, though. My Da or Cam stop in every few weeks to check on things. But before we unpack the car, we should probably go inside and see if everything is in order.” Jamie heads toward the porch and I follow, still annoyed but not wanting to be left outside by myself. The huge front door looks heavy and I’m shocked when Jamie unlocks it, and it silently swings inward with little effort. He glances at me as if he’s expecting a reaction, and smiles when he sees it. “Da and I worked on this for a month to get the balance just right.”

“Impressive.” I grudgingly acknowledge the accomplishment as we enter the living room. Things are a bit dusty, but not as bad as I’d been expecting. The place has a slight musty smell, but it’s already clearing out with the breeze from the open door. My eye is immediately drawn to the natural granite fireplace in the center of the opposite wall. It’s huge, taking up half of the length of the room and looks expertly crafted, but not prefabricated. “I suppose your father built that as well?”

Jamie nods and grins. “We built the whole place, actually. It was something Da wanted to try. He’d built barns, and sheds, and garages for the farm, but never a house, and definitely never a log cabin. I think that may have more to do with why there’s limited electricity than he likes to let on.”

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