Page 39 of Choose Me

I tuck his hair behind his ear and smile down at him. “I just want you to know I think you’re brew-tiful in the morning.”

“Oh my god, Erik, stop!”

Jules’ laugh is the absolute best sound and fills my heart. “All right, but only if you kiss me.” I nuzzle behind his ear and he moans softly.

“I have morning breath.”

“I don’t care.” I nibble at his neck and the way he arches against my body makes me forget all about puns and Quinn.

He places one more kiss on my chest before rolling onto his back and shouting through the door at Quinn. “I’ll be out in five minutes.” Then he turns back to me. “That okay?”

As I nuzzle into his hair, I give serious thought to what we could get up to in that time. “I will never complain about having you naked in bed, even if it’s only for five minutes. Though I’m happy to stay here longer.” Experimentally, I raise my knee, sliding my thigh gently over his hard cock.

Jules groans and rocks his hips forward. “You know I want to stay in bed with you.” It’s very nearly a petulant whine and makes me chuckle.

“There’s always later, sweetheart.”

Jules huffs in disgust and stares at the ceiling. “I wish it was later already.” He reaches up and cups my face. “There’s no place I’d rather be than here with you.”

Ignoring our morning breath, I lean down and kiss him slowly, because there is nothing more important than making sure Jules knows he’s loved. My brain stutters to a halt and I stare at him. I love Jules. I’m in love with Jules. “It’s all right,elskling.” I stroke my fingertips along his cheek and smile at him. “It’s not like I’m going anywhere. Well, you know what I mean. I probably should go now so you can catch up with Quinn.”

He clutches at my arms, and the intensity in his gaze sends tendrils of electricity through me. “Don’t be ridiculous. Quinn knows you’re here. Plus, he’s been spending more and more time at Tadhg’s. I’m sure he’ll be heading back there soon. In fact, I bet it won’t be long before they move in together.”

If I hadn’t known Jules for years, I might miss the slightly forced curve of his lips and the overly bright tone of his words. But Idoknow him, and he’s not as fine with it as he’s pretending. “So, you’ll be on your own?”

“Yup. Get the whole place to myself.”

Yeah, he’s definitely not okay about it, and that worries me. For as much as he hates being in groups with strangers, Jules is a very social person and wants to be around his family and friends. Living alone isn’t going to help his anxiety. “So you’re okay with that?”

“I kind of have to be. I suppose I could see if Stef wants to move in together, but he’s so busy he’s never around anyway. And then he’ll be dragging me out to socialize, and that makes me anxious just thinking about it. I’m a boring homebody. I like to stay in and play video games or read, and Stef likes to go out, and that’s not me.”

He turns us onto our sides and draws lazy circles over my chest with his fingertips as he talks. I love how casually intimate it is. “Yeah, it’s not my thing either.” For as much as I love my best friend and wouldn’t change him for the world, being with him can be exhausting. “I go where he leads because I love him, but I know what you’re saying. I like staying in.”

Jules nuzzles into my neck, kissing my skin, and I wonder if he has any idea what he does to me. Or how happy he makes me just being around him. I hum and tilt my head, encouraging him, because if he’s willing to stay in bed with me, I won’t hurry him out. But my conscience drives me to make sure it’s what he really wants. “Don’t start something you can’t finish.”

With a grumble, he flops back onto the mattress. “I don’t want to go out there, because then you’ll go home and I won’t see you.”

I kiss him on the forehead and both his adorably pink cheeks. “Jules…”

He covers his eyes with his hands. “I’m sorry. That was incredibly presumptuous of me. And demanding. You probably don’t think this is much of anything, and—“

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Jules. Look at me.” I tug at his hands and wait for him to look at me. “Elskling, this is something. It’s a very big something.”

He searches my face for a long moment then moves closer. “What is it?”

“I don’t know.” I kiss his temple. “But whatever it is, it’s important to me. And it’s something I want to explore.”

His smile is blinding. “You do?”

“I do. Jules, my feelings for you aren’t new. They didn’t just spring up overnight. I’ve been fighting this for years.”

He pushes up on his elbow and looks me square in the eyes. “Why?”

“Elskling, you know why.”

Jules nods. “Stef. I just don’t know why it has to be like that.”

I tuck a lock of hair behind his ear just so I can touch him. “I don’t know either. But he’s not in favor of anything happening between us.” I have no idea how I’m going to tell him that ship has sailed.

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