Page 19 of The Masks We Wear

He nods. “Exactly why I want you to take it.” I give him a questioning look and he adds, “You’re gonna work towards sobriety and you’re gonna work towards a negative drug test and once you finally get there, you’ll feel like you accomplished something.”

I frown. “I can be sober without having to fill a plastic cup with my dignity.”

He doesn’t back down an inch. Instead, he just stares at me until I’m so uncomfortable that I jump off my seat and grab the plastic cup, heading to the downstairs bathroom.

Chapter 11

Harvey

“Come here. I wantyou to see it,” I command Brody. She gives me a look of irritation, one I’ve come to know very well from her, from where she sits on the leather couch with her arms crossed and her lips pursed. She’s embarrassed. Good. I want her to feel embarrassed every time she gets drug tested so that the desire to do the drugs fizzles out.

She shakes her head. “I’m fine sitting right where I am, thanks.”

I bring the positive drug test over to her instead and she frowns deeper, her brows knotting in the middle. I hold it up in front of her face. “Look.”

She slaps the positive test out of my hand and rises to her feet, storming out of the room. “I don’t need to look at it to know it’s positive, Asshole. I literally took edibles yesterday.”

I follow her out of the room, hot on her heels. “How does it make you feel?”

She snorts a laugh, “The drugs or the piss test?”

I raise a brow and contemplate the question before answering, “Both.”

She stops walking and turns to face me. She opens her mouth to speak but then closes it and thinks better of what she was going to say. She takes a minute to answer and finally speaks with a gleam in her eyes, “The drugs make me feel good. They make the hard feelings go away. When I take them, the things that bother me and worry me when I’m sober can’t get to me.” Her eyes glaze over as she speaks, and I can hear the heavyemotion behind her words but what could bother her so much when she’s sober that she feels a need to take drugs? What goes on in that head of hers? She wipes the emotion off her face and replaces it with a look of disgust, “As for the piss test, it makes me feel like shit. I don’t like the idea of you demanding I piss in cups. It’s weird.”

“What bothers you so much when you’re sober?” I ask. Maybe if I can get to the root of the problem, I can get rid of the problem itself.

She rolls her eyes and turns her back on me, walking away once more. “We’re not going there. It’s personal.”

“Come on, Little Rockstar, you told me you were gonna play nice so play nice.” I push her but she doesn’t budge. Instead, she continues walking and I follow her all the way up the stairs and to her bedroom, hoping she’ll give me something.

She’s about to shut the door in my face when emotion tears a small hole in the wall she’s built around her emotions. “It’s better for me and for everyone else when I’m high.” Is all she says as she closes the door and cuts off our connection.

It’s better for me and for everyone else when I’m high.What does she mean by that?

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ANOTHER WEEK PASSES ANDI’m pleased to report that the little rockstar has been on good behavior. She hasn’t snuck out or attempted to sneak out, she hasn’t taken any more of the edibles I know she still has hidden somewhere, she hasn’t asked to see her friends, and all she’s really been doing is playing the drums in her room or in the recording studio in the basement of her mansion. I don’t eavesdrop on her while she plays because I know my presence makes her uncomfortable when she’s playing but also because I’m not a fan of music. I think music is pointless. Why would someone waste their time listening tomusic when they could be listening to an audiobook or podcast that’s going to make a difference in their lives and inspire them to be better?

I try to give her space because I know we have a tendency to fight when we’re in the same room for too long. I don’t want to argue with her. I know before I did because I liked the challenge that she presented me with, but that was before I saw her as a real human being. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t go soft or anything, I just see that she is trying even if the effort is minimal and that’s all I can ask for right now. I don’t want to bicker or argue with her and make her go back five steps. Besides, she’s grown on me but only a little. The other night, she ventured outside of her room and into the home theater to watch a mafia movie of some kind and I joined her without asking. I sat on the opposite end of the large couch, but I still watched it with her. She didn’t complain about my presence and I didn’t dare initiate a conversation. When the movie ended, we both went our separate ways with low “good nights” and we didn’t speak again until breakfast the next morning.

I hear footsteps padding down the stairs and look up from where I’m plating her breakfast -the same way I have been every morning since our arrangement was made- to find her with a faraway expression on her face. “Morning,” she greets but her voice sounds dead.

I raise a brow, “What’s wrong?”

She shrugs, “Nothing.”

She tries to dig into her breakfast, but I pull the plate away. “Talk.”

Brody sighs, “I’m bored.”

“Do you want to go somewhere?”

“Where do I even have to go?” She looks anywhere but at me. Her chest deflates as she speaks, and I feel a small tinge of pity in my chest.

I push the food towards her, and she no longer looks at it like she’s starving. In fact, she doesn’t look hungry at all. “You have to be at the studio in a few hours. Selene wants you three making a new album. Apparently, you have a contract with the record label and you guys have to put a new album out within the next three months. If you don’t, they’re gonna sue you and most likely drop you.”

She throws her head back and groans. “Great, another lawsuit.”

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