Page 39 of The Masks We Wear

He shakes his head, “You just got attacked and you’re askingmeifI’mhurt?”

I frown.

“I’m fine, Brody. I can’t say the same for him. I would’ve torn him limb from limb if Selene hadn’t stopped me,” his voice darkens and becomes laced with violence.

“Thank you for what you did.”

His brows pull together, “You never have to thank me for wanting to protect you. It’s my job to keep you safe.”

I sigh and exhale as the sting of the reminder sets in. “Right. Your job.”

He gently places his fingers at the base of my chin and forces my gaze back up to his. “My job is to protect you and that is why I pulled him off you.” The sting deepens and he continues, completely catching me off guard. “But that isn’t why I beat him bloody and nearly killed him.”

This catches my attention. My eyes widen even though they yearn to close from the stinging of the many tears shed and the overall exhaustion. “Why did you do it then?”

He clenches his jaw so hard I don’t think he’ll respond but he surprises me when he says, “I beat him bloody and nearly killed him because the sight of another man touching you or anywhere near you infuriates me like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I lost complete control over myself and all I knew was that I wanted to kill him. I wanted to kill him for looking at you, for touching you, and for daring to think he could ever get away with hurting you.” His fingers leave my chin and caress my still-stinging cheek from where I was slapped. “You aren’t mine to protect, Little Rockstar, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t still kill for you.”

His words are so pure and honest from the emotion behind them to the gentle side of him I don’t often see. They send me over the edge and fresh tears stream down my cheeks. He wipes them away quickly with his thumbs and shushes, “Come here,” he opens his arms for me and I wrap mine around his neck, burying my face in the crook of his shoulder. He lifts me off theedge of the bed and sits with me, positioning us so that he lays with his back against the headboard, and I lay curled up into his side with my face on his chest. The overwhelming feeling of being held and comforted by this man causes fresh tears to spill from my eyes. We’ve been rocky these last few days and we’ve never gotten along but in my time of need he made sure to move heaven and earth to save me, to protect me. I’ve never had someone care about me enough to nearly kill someone and the thought forces a surge of loneliness through me. It’s ironic because I live a life full of people, but I’m still alone.

He rubs my back in soothing circles and I whisper, “I thought I was going to die, Harvey.”

His voice darkens, “I told you I would never let that happen.”

“You don’t understand. I thought I was going todie,” I choke out the words. “I would’ve been another rockstar reported dead on the news. Everyone would post a picture of me with a headline and I’d be a trending hashtag for a week but then by the next I’d be forgotten. I would’ve had nothing to leave behind aside from a mask of someone I’m not.”

His lips press against my temple. “Then show them who you are.”

I go quiet at his words. The idea was never possible before because I was so concerned with my image and what people thought of me. But after nearly dying? I don’t want to be remembered by the mask I wear, I want to be remembered for who I really am, whoever that is. I promise myself in this moment that I will find out who I am and I will move past this. I will fix my reputation and be whoIwant to be, not who everyone else wants me to be. My whole life I’ve been a puppet on the string with different masters pulling me in different directions. From my parents to my brother to my friends and to my fans, they’ve strung me up and conducted my movements. The only person who’sneverwanted me to be someone I’m notis the man holding me right now. I let that realization sink in as I listen to the sound of his breaths, his heartbeat lulling me to sleep on his chest.

Chapter 18

Harvey

“We’ll cancel the show,”Selene demands from where she paces back and forth in my hotel room. Brody sits, curled into a ball in the bed we shared last night, still in sweats and a solemn expression. She fell asleep on my chest last night and as much as reason demanded I move her; I couldn’t bring myself to move her. I needed to be touching her as much as she needed to be held by me. The sheer terror that the thought of her harmed in any way brought me still doesn’t sit right with me. I care about the little rockstar way more than I care to admit and my actions of last night speak for themselves.

I can still hear the sounds of his bones cracking under my fists and the feeling of his warm blood splattering across my face and chest. I can still recall the feral part of me that wanted to kill him for touching her, for hurting her, and for scaring her. I remember especially wanting to kill him for the image I still have burned into my memory of him on top of her with her in just a towel, the life draining from her eyes. I’ve seen Brody in a plethora of moods. I’ve seen her semi-happy, I’ve seen her sad, I’ve seen her angry, I’ve seen her tired, butneverhave I seen Brody the way she was last night. She was broken and her pain radiated off of her in waves. I wish more than anything that I could take her pain away and inflict it on myself. Anything to protect her but I know I can’t.

I’ve been very gentle and calm with her since, not wanting to throw her off in any way. This morning she woke up and looked startled when she found she was still laying on my chestand just when I thought she was going to flee, she put her head back down and stayed silent. I was shocked to find I didn’t mind in the slightest. I’ve accepted now that I care about her in a way that is entirely different from that of a client. I gathered as much about my own emotions after I found I was unable to sleep a wink last night. I couldn’t bring myself to close my eyes. I needed to be watching her in case she needed me, in case she woke up afraid,anything. I was ready to be anything she needed me to be and to do anything she needed me to do and I still feel that way for her.

“No,” Brody’s small voice breaks through my inner monologue.

I cross my arms over my chest from where I stand at the foot of the bed, watching her. “You can’t perform.”

She shakes her head, rubbing her eyes with the heels of her palms, “We’re performing. These people paid a lot of money to see us and I don’t want to disappoint them.”

Aria frowns, biting her bottom lip. She glances at Ivory with a look of question but Ivory doesn’t look like she has any ideas. I’ll admit, I’m not the fondest of the two girls but they were there for Brody last night in her time of need and that means something to Brody so it means something to me too. Aria speaks up, “We can refund the tickets or just reschedule the show for a later date. Honestly, B, nobody is gonna be upset with you if you want to cancel this show or the rest of the tour.”

Brody’s eyes widen but not in fear, in conviction. “We’re not canceling. The show is on and so is the tour.”

Ivory adds, “Brody, I don’t want to upset you but what happened is all over the news. It’s all-over social media and it broke the internet. Everyone knows. It is totally okay to not want to do this.”

Brody sits up, her eyes glaze over as if she’s going to cry but she forces the emotions at bay. “I want to perform.”

Selene, Aria, and Ivory look at each other with worried expressions. I whisper to them, “Can you give me a minute alone with her?”

They nod reluctantly before exiting the room. Once they’re gone, I sit at the foot of the bed and watch her. “Why do you want to do this so badly?”

She sits up, hugging her knees to her chest. “You said it yourself. I have to show them who I am and I am not someone who will be victimized by a robbery gone awry.”

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