Page 41 of Unsteady in Love

“This is what I’m talking about, Prue. You’re already disappointed in me.”

“Explain to me why the plan has changed.”

“Don’t be stupid, Prue. You know exactly why.” Each word was laced with disappointment.

“Because of your leg?” I questioned. Why did he think he couldn’t do anything anymore?

“Yes, because of my fucking leg. It’s fucking gone,” he shouted then ground his teeth together as he looked at me with furious eyes.

“Holden, you are going to walk again,” I stated softly. “No, you’re not going to jump out of bed tomorrow walking, but it is going to happen. Then you can do whatever you want, including going on our honeymoon and keeping me in bed for a month.”

He shook his head before turning to look out the window again. “You make it sound easy.”

“I know it isn’t going to be easy, but I know you and how strong and persistent you are. Don’t let this keep you down. The only way it is going to rule your life is if you let it.”

“You’re annoying. You know that, right?” He took a deep breath as he looked deep inside me for a long moment. “I know I don’t deserve you, but thank you for being here, Prue.”

“I wouldn’t be anywhere else. Thanks for finally getting your head out of your ass and letting me visit you.”

We sat quietly for a few moments looking at each other. I wanted to touch him desperately, but I wasn’t sure if he was ready for my touch. I knew it was likely that when I came back tomorrow, he might refuse to see me again, and I’d have to battle him again.

How many times would he try to push me away before he realized I was never letting him go?

I knew I had to steel myself for the inevitable hurt that was sure to invite itself along on this journey with Holden. My heart already ached at seeing how difficult this was on him, and I knew it would only get harder once he had to start therapy and get his prosthetic.

My fingers twitched at my side longing to reach out to him.

“What happened?” he asked quietly, his index finger traced along the top of my hand.

His simple touch made me want to cry, and I knew I needed to get ahold of myself.

I shrugged not wanting to answer him.

“Don’t keep to yourself. Tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours.” His quiet words spurred me on.

I took a deep breath and held it as I stared into his soft gaze. I needed to be truthful with him and not hold back. I knew that, but it was so hard when his emotional stability was at risk. Blowing out a deep breath, I hooked my pinky with his index finger.

“I was thinking about how many more times you were probably going to push me away and how much it hurt when you didn’t want to see me. I raced as fast as I could to Germany only to be told that I couldn’t see you. I don’t want to go through that again,” I choked out, a tear slipping down my cheek.

“Fuck, Prue.” My name sounded as if it got caught in his throat. Choked and garbled. “Come here.” His hands reached around me and pulled me up the bed like I had been earlier. I slipped my arm around his waist and held him as tightly as I could.

“Hey,” his hand ran down my hair and back, “I’m not going anywhere.”

Loosening my hold, I scooted up and buried my face in his neck, my nose running along the column of his throat as I took in his spicy scent that had somehow managed to stick with him even without his soap and aftershave. “You still smell the same.”

He chuckled and held me closer. “What do I smell like?”

“It’s going to sound silly, but you smell like home. That was my thought when you showed up in Fairlane. Warmth and spice.” I shrugged. “Home.”

“It doesn’t sound silly,” he replied his voice full of emotion.

I tilted my head back to get a good look at him. His eyes were closed, and his face was serene as he twirled a piece of my hair.

“I love you,” I whispered.

Holden’s eyes opened with fire in them. His hand that had been playing with my hair pulled me closer until our lips were only a breath away. His eyes flicked down to my mouth and back up to catch my gaze before he erased the distance between us and brushed his lips to mine.

Instantly, I was on fire. It had been too long since I’d been with a man and too long since Holden had touched me. “Holden,” I groaned out his name. My tongue swept along his full lips, desperate to get inside and taste him. He opened for me, and I dove in. Exploring every inch of his mouth, our tongues dueled and danced. My fingers tried to tangle in the short hairs at his neck, and when they were unsuccessful, my hands wandered along the expanse of his muscled back.

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