Page 16 of Secret Admirer

When we turn around, the EMTs are both getting into the ambulance. How did I not notice when they walked away? I know. Because Bodhi had my undivided attention.

“My car’s over there.” I motion toward my car and only in that moment with Bodhi by my side do I realize how excessive it is. God, what’s he going to think of me when he sees my house? Maybe this wasn’t the best idea. I don’t want him to think I’m some rich, spoiled brat treating him like a charity case. Only I’m not sure how to show Bodhi how I see the man underneath the exterior.

“I know,” he murmurs, walking straight to my car.

We’re silent as we head out of the parking lot. It’s uncomfortable, but I don’t know how to fix it. Bodhi is sitting ramrod straight as if he touches anything, I’ll yell at him or it will bite him. My stomach growls loudly. You’d think an alien is about to burst out of it from the loud noise. I feel my entire body heat from his gaze and my embarrassment.

“Um…I don’t have a lot of food at my house. Would you be opposed to stopping for some takeout and maybe the store to get some first aid stuff?”

Bodhi only shakes his head.

I know if I ask him what he wants he’ll say he’s fine, so I don’t ask. I head to my favorite Chinese takeout and order one of everything. Out of the corner of my eye, I see him shift uncomfortably, but he doesn’t say anything and neither do I.

After a quick stop at Target, I grab some bandages, antibiotic ointment, and a few food staples. I’m going to have to get used to having food at my house since no one delivers.

“So…I…my parents died recently, and they were about to move into a new house.” I bite my bottom lip. I don’t want to think of my parents and start crying in front of Bodhi, but I need to explain. “Anyway, they left the house to me and I moved in a few days ago.”

“Why are you telling me this?” he asks the window. The way he won’t look at me makes me think he already knows. Either that or he’s regretting his decision to come home with me. God this is a mess.

“My parents had a lot of money. I guess now I do too, but it doesn’t feel like mine.” He glances my way, his lips in a thin line. “I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable or think I’m some spoiled brat.”

“I don’t think that.”

“Not yet,” I say softly, my eyes on the horizon.

Landscaping lights come into view and I glance over at Bodhi. He’s watching with intense interest as my house comes into view. You can’t see much in the dark, but you can briefly see the lights from the pool before we turn onto the driveway.

Once inside the garage we sit, neither of us ready to get out.

“I don’t think I belong here,” Bodhi strangles out in a rough whisper.

9

Bodhi

Oasis hasa lot of rich people who live here and every day I see their houses. From the street and behind walls, but Coco’s house is on another level. Now I understand why she mentioned it was supposed to be her parents’ house.

I look down at my dirty clothes and feel inferior and unworthy of being in her presence. Why did she ask me here?

We’re only in her garage but it’s the nicest garage I’ve ever seen. It’s immaculate with everything in its place. Where I come from, garages are filled to the brim with people's shit, but I guess when you have a house as large as this you have plenty of places to put all your belongings.

Coco faces me with a look of worry etched in her expression. I can’t even imagine what I look like as I stare as the garage door goes down, trapping me inside.

Moving around to the front of her car, Coco starts taking out the bags of groceries and takeout food. Who knew cars had trunks in the front? I certainly didn’t. It’s more than obvious we are from two very different worlds. Everything about Coco’s world makes me feel like an idiot and an alien at the same time.

“Let me take those. It’s the least I can do,” I murmur as I gather all the bags from her.

“Bodhi, you don’t owe me anything.” My name on her lips sounds like angels singing from heaven. Every time I hear it, my body flushes with the most delicious feeling of something I can’t quite describe. Whatever it is, makes me crave to hear her say my name over and over again. The thought of her saying my name in ecstasy makes my heart race and my dick twitch. I know now more than ever that Coco will never see me like that. I’m not boyfriend material. Not for a woman like her. Not when she has all this.

I stop dead in my tracks when I step inside her home. The furnishing is sparse, as if she didn’t have enough to fill it up, but all the furniture is nice and expensive. The entire back wall of her house is made up of windows and looks out onto the city. It’s beautiful and humbling.

“Come set those over here and I’ll show you where a bathroom is so you can take a shower. I wish I had some clothes for you to change into, but I do have a robe for guests to use. I know I want to wash away the day after—” She stops abruptly and starts taking items out of the bags to put onto her white countertops. They look expensive as shit. Everything does. I’m afraid if I touch anything it might break, especially Coco.

…after being attacked and probably almost raped is what I’m sure she was about to say. Reality is finally starting to rear its ugly head and at any moment she might break down.

What do I do then?

Should I hug her?

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