Page 33 of Secret Admirer

Did he purposely keep his hair long to avoid people?

“You can ask. I see it all over your face even in the dim light.” He shifts a little to look out more at the city than me.

“You don’t have to talk about anything that makes you uncomfortable. Ever. All you have to do is say the word. There’s something about you that makes me want to know every little thing about you, but I can also tell you don’t like talking about yourself much.”

“Growing up we didn’t have much money, and I wasalwaysgrowing too fast. My mother couldn’t keep up with my growth spurts, so my clothes were almost always too small for me.” He glances at me but goes back to looking at the lights. I don’t fault him. Sometimes it’s easier if you don’t have to look at the person you’re speaking to. “I’ve always been quiet. I guess too quiet because from the time I can remember kids were always making fun of me. Either for my clothes that weren’t quite long enough, not clean enough, or for not having any friends.”

I gasp and cover my mouth with my hand. Why are children so cruel?

“I got used to not having any friends and hearing all their comments behind my back. It got better for a little while in high school. I shot up again and started lifting weights which caught all the girls’ eyes. I know most boys don’t know how to talk to girls or women, but I wasn’t used to talking to anyone but my mom, and soon enough the girls who tried to talk to me or go out with me and use me started to whisper about me too.” Bodhi tips back his beer and finishes it. “I thought maybe when I left our small-town things would be different, but it was the same on a different scale. I didn’t have the connections or money to make it in New York and, eventually, everything caught up with me. I lost my job and my shoebox sized apartment and ended up on the streets with nowhere to go.”

I slide around the spa to sit closer to him. Taking the beer from him, I grasp his hand in mine and hold it to my chest. “I’m sorry people were so cruel to you. Is that why you hid underneath all that hair?”

He looks down at me for a moment, his eyes glistening before looking out at the city again. “It was easier that way. It wasn’t like I could go get it cut. I didn’t have the money and no one messed with me or tried to interact with me. It was for the best.” He shrugs as if it’s not a big deal that he was essentially bullied and isolated himself because of it.

“Thank you for telling me. You didn’t have to.” I lay my head on his shoulder and feel him tense for only a second before he relaxes back against the wall. “What did the kids think about your new look?”

He barks out a laugh and looks down at me. His eyes dance with happiness. It’s obvious how much he loves working with them. “They didn’t know what to think at first. Didn’t even believe it was me. They had some fun with me, but they’re good kids.”

“What did you do with them today?”

“After doing the pumpkins at Tricks, I had the idea to do them with the kids. I asked Lucille the director if there was any money to get a few pumpkins for the kids to decorate and she delivered.” I could hear the smile in his voice. “She got two decent sized pumpkins, so I split the kids up into two groups and they decided what design they wanted to do. They had some good ideas and I think they came out pretty well.”

“You like working with them.”

“I do. I never thought of myself as a teacher, but I like helping them express themselves. It’s been so long since I had the outlet that it means all the more to me now. I hope they keep me on, but I know the budget is tight.”

I’m sure they take anonymous donations and it does seem like a good cause.

“I’m sure they will. Are you worried they won’t have a room for you?”

“I was, but Lucille said she’ll keep the one I have for me until I tell her I no longer need it.” I know if I look up at him right now, I’ll see doubt on his handsome face. I can hear it in his voice. After spending years on the street, it would be scary to have a place and know at any moment they might need the bed for someone else.

Bodhi stops talking and his body goes rigid. Lifting my head, I see the security light at the front of the house come on.

“Did you call the security company?” He stands looking toward the light.

Reaching up, I grab Bodhi’s hand and squeeze. “Yeah, but they couldn’t come out today. They promised they’d be here bright and early in the morning to install cameras and discuss other options.”

“Go inside, lockeverything, and turn on the alarm.” He steps out of the spa and stalks off toward the light.

“Bodhi, please be careful,” I whisper-yell.

He disappears around the corner and I run into the house.

16

Bodhi

I don’t knowhow long I toss and turn after leaving Coco to go to bed. Even though I saw nothing earlier, I can’t stop thinking I might have missed something. Whoever has been coming onto her property knows what they’re doing because they never leave a trace.

A soft knock at the door has me turning onto my back just in time to see Coco slip into the room. “Are you awake?” she whispers as she slowly walks toward the bed.

Sitting up against the headboard, I watch her move closer and clear my throat. “Yeah, I couldn’t sleep. Are you okay? What are you doing in here?”

“Every time I close my eyes, I keep seeing someone outside, the lights turning on, or worse, something happening to you.” She chokes out. “Can I stay in here with you?”

I’m not sure my body could handle another night with Coco next to it, but I’m here to help her feel safe and if sleeping by my side makes her feel safe, then I’ll suffer. I wish I could assure her that earlier was a raccoon or a lizard or something, but I can’t. I saw nothing. Be that human or animal it left no trace behind.

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