Page 28 of Dominion

Purple and blue bruises in the shape of a rope circled his neck, barely hidden by the blond hair that was getting too long. He was wrapped in a blanket, shaking uncontrollably, pushing Ash’s hand away that was trying to soothe him. I didn’t miss the anger that flashed in Ash’s eyes, or the lost look in Dylan’s as he stared straight ahead, ignoring the two of us.

Whimpers erupted from his chest every now and then, but he never once looked at me. He was lost, somewhere far away from here. The mere thought of this guy, my guy, who was bigger than life looking this broken, unraveled me.

“Ash,” I whispered, my voice shaking as I looked down at the guy I loved more than anything. But instead of the happiness I still believed would exist in him when he saw me and the unconditional love he once professed for me, anger slammed to the front, blazing through his cerulean eyes, rendering me speechless.

I should’ve been ready for this, but I fooled myself into thinking that they wouldn’t hate me for the foolishness that caused them their freedom. I fooled myself into thinking that my actions wouldn’t have this kind of reaction, because it was easier living with the oblivion these past couple of days, rather than living with the knowledge that they might hate me.

“Ash, please, I’m?—”

“Save it,” he growled, pushing away from the car, and standing up. The blanket barely reached his hips, and I forced myself not to drag my eyes all over his body, to make sure that he wasn’t hurt. That he was okay.

Butokaywas such an annoying word we all used to fool everyone else into thinking that we were alright. After all, I was the one person who was an expert in pretending and spewing bullshit words like okay whenever I didn’t feel like talking aboutmy problems. But the problem with being a master at those things was that you didn’t know when to stop.

And neither did Ash.

My shaky right hand reached out toward Ash, whose blazing eyes told me everything I needed to know—my touch wasn’t welcome here. My words weren’t either. My mouth opened to let the words out, to try and tell him again how sorry I was, but nothing came out. In the next second, he started walking away from me, into the darkness, and right past the worried Cillian who didn’t move from his spot. My lower lip wobbled, the knowledge that I had destroyed us, slicing through me like sharp knives.

My mind and my heart were pulled in two different directions. My heart wanted to run after him, to wrap my arms around his body, to show him how much I loved him, how sorry I was, if he didn’t want to listen right now. But my mind knew that it would’ve been futile trying to say anything.

The agony I went through over the last three days was nothing compared to what the two of them survived, and it would be selfish trying to get him to forgive me after everything he went through. But God, his rejection hurt. I didn’t expect him to welcome me with open arms, but I also didn’t expect this.

“Little One,” the voice that was a part of most of my life suddenly said from my right, and every single thought of Ash flew out of my mind, disappearing into the thin air as I looked down into the car where Dylan was huddled, his eyes finally clearer.

Some people carried their pain on the surface of their skin, showing it to everyone that would listen. But Dylan… Dylan hid his pain behind mischievous smiles and softly spoken words. To see it reflecting on his face so clearly right now was my undoing.

I thought I had cried all the tears I had in my system, but those two words from him unraveled me, making me break rightin front of him. I felt selfish for crying when I wasn’t the one hurting, but neither one of us said a single word as I pushed inside the car, closing the door behind me, and wrapping myself around his body like an additional blanket.

His entire body shook, the smell of urine and sweat lingering on his skin. I fought against the wave of nausea clogging my throat. I pushed through, burying my nose in his damp hair, clinging to him like a koala to a tree branch, unable to let go. Our sobs filled the otherwise quiet car, my hand landing on the back of his neck, while my fingers softly brushed over the angry-looking skin where the bruises had formed.

Arms wrapped around me, pulling me into his lap, while both of us shook, crying and murmuring to each other. I knew that there were no words I could say that would change what happened to him. He didn’t need to tell me about the monstrosities. I could see the broken spirit and the pain staring back at me.

He didn’t have to form the words for me to know how badly it hurt, how badly they’d scarred him. It wasn’t the scars and the bruises on the surface of his skin that worried me. It was those that I couldn’t see, the ones I couldn’t soothe with my love that scared the living shit out of me. I wanted to believe he was strong, much stronger than this, but the way he held on to me, the way he cried, those tears leaving traces through the dirt that clung to his face, told me that this was going to be a tough road.

And I had no idea if we were ready for it.

“It’s going to be okay,” I sobbed, hiding my face in the crook of his neck. “We’re all going to be okay.”

But the moment those words flew out of my mouth, I knew I was lying. I had no idea if any one of us would be okay after this.

7

SKYLAR

Ash was avoiding me,that much was obvious, and I had no idea what to do with that information. The rational part of my brain told me to give him space, to let him come to me instead of making things worse, but I couldn’t let it go.

His anger would’ve been better than this silence, this ignorance he granted me with, but I didn’t want to push him. We already teetered on a very thin line, and Ash wasn’t someone who did well with emotional confrontation. There were other things he never talked about—that everything his so-called uncle told him was a lie—and I knew that if it had been me, I would’ve pushed everyone away.

I understood that we needed to rebuild what had been shattered, but I wasn’t a patient person. Not when it came to these things.

It hurt knowing that Ash chose to drive with someone else rather than with Dylan and me, but I had more than five hours to think about everything. I hated that every single one of my thoughts ended with the same outcome—I would lose them both. Somewhere in the depths of despair, I knew that it was only my mind making me think that, but it was hard shaking off those sinister thoughts when the future seemed so bleak.

Dylan calmed down enough for the ride, and when Cillian and Claudio sat in the front, neither one of us spoke. They didn’t comment that Dylan was practically lying on me, or that the car reeked. Claudio just started driving, following the three other cars that left with us. From what little I could catch, Chiara stayed back, deciding to help the boys they had found in the manor, commanding the crowd with a strength I only dreamed of. The words she gifted me earlier in the house kept on ringing in my head.

Revenge.

I wanted revenge for this.

I wanted revenge for Dylan who was now sleeping in my lap, his body twitching and turning every now and then, his chest shaking with unreleased sobs. I wanted revenge for Ash who never came back to us, and I had no idea if he ever would.

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