Page 38 of Dominion

Yeah, he wasn’t harmless at all.

“I don’t see a reason to keep my mouth shut,” I said, leaning against the backrest, and Ash followed suit. “You’re here, and it’s obvious that you’ve known about me much longer than I’ve known about you, so why now? What do you want?” The words tumbled out of me before I could stop them, but why should I? For most of my life, I tried being quiet, keeping to the side,keeping myself in the shadows from the fear that I would say something wrong.

That I would tarnish the great Blackwood name.

Everything I wanted, everything I loved, had to be hidden from the eyes of the founding families, because they didn’t want us to think for ourselves. Even before I found out about the Order, there was always this feeling, this little niggling thought in the back of my head that they didn’t want children. They wanted robots they could shape how they wanted us to be, not who we really were.

It wasn’t only my family that was like that—all of them behaved in the same way.

Don’t speak too loud.

Don’t laugh too loud.

Say thank you, please, and apologize even when it isn’t your fault.

We’re better than them, but we shouldn’t show them that we’re better.

You’re a Blackwood, Skylar. Lift your chin up. Smile, darling, smile.

The vicious face of Dylan’s mother still appeared in my nightmares. The grimace every time I spoke, every time I dared to voice my opinions. I couldn’t understand back then what it was that I did so wrong that would make her hate me so much. My own mother, my own flesh and blood, but now I knew.

I was the daughter of a woman she hated with all her might. I was the woman who stole her precious Dylan. I was the one who could destroy them all if they failed to get me in line.

I wasn’t going to get in line. I wasn’t going to dance to the rhythm of the music they played. I was tired of the rules, tired of the darkness living inside that house of horrors we grew up in.

Dylan never spoke of the things they did to him, but I knew it wasn’t pretty. Even a blind person could see it.

Perhaps I couldn’t fix myself, and I couldn’t erase the terrible things that had happened to me, but I was stronger than my demons. I was stronger than all these people who wanted to harm me. Casimir Lacroix, or whatever his last name truly was, had no idea who he would be messing with if he tried to do something.

“You remind me of someone,” he said, leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees. “You remind me of our mother.”

The air was sucked out of my lungs, my molars grinding against each other at the mention of a woman I had never met. I didn’t have feelings for her—how could I when I never truly met her? There was no lost love, no sadness over her.

I was sad for me. I was sad for the little girl who could’ve been so much more if Judah Blackwood hadn’t brought me to Winworth.

“She is as fierce and loyal as you are.” Ash’s hand tightened on my knee, his way of showing support when I truly needed it.

Was this Casimir’s plan? To shake me down so hard that I would crack, allowing him inside these impenetrable walls I had created?

“But you’re stronger than her,” he added finally, that irritating smirk gracing his too-perfect face. “You’re more stubborn and I guess that after everything you’ve gone through, you had to become strong.”

I wanted to wipe away that proud grin on his face, as if he had any right to be proud of me. It was irrational. He had nothing to do with the way I turned out, and the fact that he was sitting there, my proud brother, was making me see red.

“You can wipe that smile off your face, Casimir. I only became strong because I had no other choice.” My words held venom I hoped would harm him, or at least make him flinch a bit, but the fucking asshole only smiled wider, his shoulders shaking before the full-blown laughter pushed through.

“No, my little butterfly,” he said, and it was as if a switch got flipped in my brain the moment that nickname rolled off of his tongue and the memories of a time long ago resurfaced. My heart thundered in my chest, my palms becoming clammy, but there was not a single doubt in my mind—I remembered it.

I remembered him.

The field was full of dandelions, and I could see my tiny legs, running in front of the boy who was double my age. He always looked so big, so strong, to my young eyes. His arms were my sanctuary. His hands were able to heal all the scrapes and bruises on my legs from every single fall. His blond hair looked as if it was filled with stars during those dark nights when I couldn’t sleep.

Casimir looked at me and I could see the moment understanding washed over his face. The smile was gone, the cockiness he oozed with diminished, and as I stood up, so did he, crossing the room in three quick strides, stopping in front of me.

He ignored Ash’s growl of warning, and Cillian stepping closer to us. He ignored the tremble in my body as he pulled me deep into a hug I didn’t expect, and those memories just kept coming back, and back and back, overflowing the sane part of my mind.

I remembered him.

I remembered it all.

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