Page 65 of One Shot

Darkness has started creeping back in, sucking the joy out of my life like a vampire. I thought I’d made incredible progress since I came to West, finding unexpected contentment that finally gave me back pieces of my old self. If I knew it would leave so quickly, I would have clung on to that happiness for dear life. I know I’ll keep getting through it, but sometimes a girl just needs her mom. I call her, and she picks up on the second ring.

Her voice is comforting, making me miss home. I try to start with casual niceties and ask how she and Dominic are doing, but I can’t help but jump in right away telling her about my feelings for Lucas.

“Oh, sweetheart, did you think I didn’t know?”

I roll my eyes. How on earth can I be that obvious to someone I haven’t even seen in months?! Not to mention she’s never seen us interact.

“Your article about him gave you away, Lauren. I could tell from the first paragraph he was someone special to you,” Mom chuckles, and I can hear her wide grin in her voice with every word. “I hope he is a nice boy. You always talked about how nice Nathan was, and he seemed nice when we met him too. But this Lucas seems to have you smitten like I’ve never seen.”

I start crying immediately knowing that grin will fade quickly. What I have to tell her next is going to break her heart. And mine.

“Mom, I lied,” Something deep inside me shatters having to tell my mom this. “Nathan was not a nice guy.”

Through tears, I tell her about Nathan’s mental abuse and jealousy with my support for the Wyverns. I tell her about the physical abuse. I tell her about my argument with Nick the night of the accident.

“Oh honey, I am so sorry you’ve been coping with this all on your own.” Despite Mom’s resilience, always staying strong, her voice is shaky with despair. The strain of holding back tears is evident with each word.

“Why did you take so long to tell me?” she asks after a few beats of silence.

“I didn’t want you to blame me for Nick’s death.” The flood gates holding back my sorrow break as my body convulses with each tear that falls.

“Lauren, the car accident happening is the furthest thing from your fault. That man was almost three times the legal limit. It had nothing to do with your argument. It is not your fault in any way, shape, or form.” Mom chokes out the words, letting her resilience fall with her tears. “I will tell you a million times over until you feel it in your heart if that’s what it takes.”

My voice softens to a whisper with the words that I have refused to speak out loud, “I didn’t want you to be ashamed of me for staying with Nathan . . . or to judge me.”

“My sweet girl, what that boy did to you poisoned your head. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You love with your full heart, even if that person doesn’t deserve it. Nathan certainly didn’t. I think we should press charges—"

“No.” I cut Mom off. “That is the furthest thing from what I want.”

“He hurt you, Lauren. And I couldn’t protect you from that. We have to do something.”

“Please, no.”

“Your brother would have gotten arrested beating his ass,” Mom says quietly.

“Yeah, he would have.”

“But Dominic would have bailed him out of jail.”

“With all his mob money?”

“Mob money? What is mob money?”

“It was a joke, Mom. Since he claims to have made good investments with good people.”

A small laugh slips through my tears. She always cheers me up somehow.

“Sweetheart, be thankful he’s too nerdy to be associated with a mob. Nathan wouldn’t stand a chance. I wish I was there to give you a hug.”

“I know, me too. I love you, Mom.”

“I love you too, Chip. Nothing will ever change that.”

We chat a little more about how school has been and about her most recent knitting and reading escapades. She’s joined a neighborhood book club apparently. The doorbell rings and I get off the phone with Mom.

“I hope it’s Lucas!”

Mom can be ridiculous, but she has me laughing through my tears. It’s not Lucas at the door; it’s Tyler coming to check on me.

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