Page 11 of Full Throttled

“Damn, dude, don’t apologize. Aubree is the light of all of our lives. I’m glad you stayed with her. So, anything new in Los Angeles?”

I swear my heart stops the moment he asks the question. He couldn’t possibly know the news I’m about to deliver. I clear my throat. “Yeah, actually there is.”

“Well, damn dude that doesn’t sound good. What’s up?”

I take a deep breath before spitting it out like word vomit. “Zoey is back and staying at the clubhouse.” Silence, complete and utter silence. This is one of those moments when you could hear a pin drop on the other end of the line.

“What?” Zayde finally croaks out.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to just blurt it out, but I was afraid I’d never say it if I didn’t. I thought you’d want a heads up before you got back.” I know I probably should have told him in a different fashion, but I didn’t know how else to tell him. Zoey being back has thrown all of us into a loop.

Zayde remains silent and if it wasn’t for the fact that I can hear him breathing I would think he’d hung up the phone. Finally, after what feels like much longer than it actuallywas, Zaydespeaks. “Thanks for letting me know.”

“Are you going to be okay?” I ask, as worry takes home in my gut.

Zayde clears his throat. “Yeah, I’m good. I’m going to go. I’ll see you in a few days.”

The line goes dead before I can even reply. I know Zayde is about to go off the deep end. I can just feel it or maybe I’m just worried he is, either way I quickly dial Barker’s number to give him a heads up that Zayde might be a loose cannon.

When I lie back on my bed, I take a deep breath and try to sleep but images of Zoey keep playing through my head. Memories blend with my distressed thoughts of how her life has been since she left. Eventually, I get up and just pace around my room when I hear a small tap on the door. I open it to find a sleepy Aubree, hugging her stuffed Jack to her chest. “You okay, Love Bug?” I ask, and I kneel down in front of her.

She rubs at her blue eyes. “Yeah, can I sleep with you?”

I open my arms, relieved that she wants to join me. Maybe, now I’ll be able to get some sleep. “Come on.” She climbs into my arms and we get comfortable in my bed. “Did you have fun today?” I ask her.

“Yeah, but I missed you,” she tells me, as she snuggles deeper into my side.

“I missed you too, Love Bug.” Her breathing evens out and I watch her sleeping face until my eyes feel heavy. “I love you.”

Nine

Zoey

I wake up and feel well rested for the first time in so long. I’m not even sure what to do with myself. I stretch and pull myself from the comfortable bed and grab a pair of jeans and the nicest shirt I have. Today I need to find a job, one that’s within walking distance, until I manage to get some gas in my car. Once I’m dressed and feel like I look employable, I open the door to findDrake’s key to this room in the knob for me. I thought I had heard Drake’s voice and tap on the door, but I was too tired to be sure. I take the key and somehow know that my car is going to have gas in it.

When I walk into the main part of the clubhouse, I find Wilder sitting on the couch, playing some video game. He looks over at me. “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” I reply.

He pauses the game and stands up. “There’s some coffee if you want some.”

“Yeah that’d be great,” I tell him. He pours me a cup and hands it to me along with a variety of creamers. He goes back to his game while I sit at the bar and enjoy the rich, hot liquid. It’s been so long since I had a good cup of coffee. I mean, I used to get it at the diner where I waitressed, but there’s something about drinking coffee that you have to make that just isn’t as good. Once I’ve finished, I walk around and clean the mug. I’m about to head out the door when I turn around and ask, “Do you know where I’ll find Drake?”

Wilder pauses the game again andturnsaround. “Yeah.” He rattles off an address and I thank him before heading out the door.

Once I’m behind the wheel of my car, I take a deep breath and start it. Sure enough, just like I expected, the tank is now full of gas. Even though Drake has a hidden sadness that is new to me lurking in the pools of his blue eyes, I’m thankful this part of him hasn’t changed. I leave the parking lot and head back into town. I need a job and then hopefully, I can find a place and car because there’s no way this car will pass inspection. I come toapart of town that is littered with fast food restaurants and small shops. I find a parking place and start at the first business and work my way up and down the blocks, applying everywhere I can.

Three hours later and I have officially applied at every place possible in this area. I climb back into my car and send a little prayer that I’ll be able to get a job within a few days. While I’m sitting there I quickly call my three jobs back in Mississippi, as well as the college and explain that I won’t be back. Everyone is very understanding, but I do get a lecture from the college letting me know I’ll be on academic probation for a year. I knew this. I hate it, but I also couldn’t stay there with Gregg anymore.

Idecidedto go and thank Drake for the gas in my car. Ifollow the street signs for the address that Wilder gave me. I’m surprised when I pull up to a construction site. I didn’t consider that he could be at work. I don’t know why that idea never occurred to me. I guess, because my life is in shambles at the moment, I forget that other people’s aren’t.

I pull up and park, but I don’t get out of the car. I don’t want to interrupt him while he’s working or get him into trouble. I’m sure the boss loves Drake, everyone always does. I sigh as memories from my former life come flooding back. Drake is attached to all the good ones. I’ve been so good all morning just working on autopilot to avoid the inevitable wave of memories.

My phone rings pulling me from memory lane. I grab the phone and see a name I don’t want to.‘Gregg’ is flashing across my screen, taunting me. I take a deep breath and silence the phone. I should have never left with him. I think somewhere deep down inside of my soul I knew it would be a mistake, but I couldn’t stay here either. I know that no one aside from Zayde understands why I fled from here. I never even told Drake why I was leaving or even that I was leaving. I just packed up and ran. Looking back, I hate how I left things between us but hopefully I can fix them now. As I sit there, I think back to the last time I saw Drake before I left.

Zayde saved me. Thank god Zayde saved me. For once, I couldn’t be more thankful for his temper. I lock my bedroom door before sliding down until my butt hits the floor. The tears flow freely down my face, leaving traces of mascara and eyeliner in their wake. I don’t care right now though. Once my crying subsides, I stand up and move to my mirrorwhereI clean up my face. I’ll never let them see me break. Once I’m put back together, I grab my phone and climb out my bedroom window and down the metal staircase that basically doubles as a fire escape. I reach the road quickly, but in the darkness and the events from earlier, make me feel uneasy.

Slipping my phone from my pocket I text Drake.

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