Page 1 of Dangerous Curves

Prologue

Kenndrix

I sit on the couch in the living room of the house we’ve made a home. It’s ours. Correction, it was ours until a couple of hours ago when my entire life turned upside down. One stupid argument, only it wasn’t a stupid argument, and it wasn’t just one time. It’s the same argument….every damn time. It’s always me and my insecurities that cause the fight. Jaxx has dealt with it for years and now he just can’t anymore. I don’t blame him. If I had been him, I would have left a long time ago.

Jaxx is a social butterfly. He’s confident and outgoing and doesn’t give a shit what anyone says or thinks about him. I envy and admire that about him. I, on the other hand, couldn't be more different. I’m a freaking mess. Constantly, I search for approval from those around me. I listen too much to what is said about me from people who don’t even know me. Should their opinions matter? Hell no, but do they? More than I’d care to admit.

All of my life, I’ve been teased or treated as an outcast because I’m never good enough. I’m either too fat, too shy, too quiet, too smart...too much of something. So, maybe it’s not that I’m not good enough. Maybe, it’s I’m just too much, but whatever the reason, I know I’ve never fit in. There’s always been someone to make me feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I have one friend, Kynlee, who is an angel I swear. That girl has saved me from my own path of self-destruction more times than even she knows. She’s seriously the best friend I could have ever asked for.

Then Jaxx Scott came into my life. He changed everything. Jaxx was the guy I had always wanted but never thought I had a chance with. He was perfect in my eyes and I put him on a pedestal. Even now, he’s still so much more than I can even describe. Jaxx picked me and I’ve never been able to figure out why? It’s the biggest mystery. He has tons of girls throwing themselves at him, girls that are gorgeous, skinny, outgoing and fit into his world. Girls that are everything I’m not. I’m a nerd, cute at best, and chubby. I don’t really fit in anywhere. You would think that once things became official with the two of us my insecurities would have shut up, but nope. They’ve gotten better, but they still rear their ugly little heads, like tonight.

We were supposed to go out with Ace James, Jaxx’s best friend, and Kynlee Adams now Kynlee James, my best friend. It seems simple and straightforward. The task should be easy, but it’s not. They want to go out to eat. I hate that. Eating in front of anyone makes me feel anxious and nervous. Kynlee was an aspiring lingerie model so you can imagine what kind of body she has. Jaxx and Ace both look amazing and then there’s me...the fat girlfriend or at least that’s how I feel. Regardless of how many times Jaxx tells me he loves me exactly how I am, or how often he tries to show me that he doesn’t care who says he can do better, I still feel that way.

So, I start to self-destruct. I push him away. I start dumb little arguments to try and get him to leave because I know he deserves better. He works in Hollywood for god sake. Jaxx needs someone to be his arm candy at premieres and events and that’s not me. All I will get him is attention for the girl he’s slumming it with. I hear the girls at the races, so I can only imagine what a trashy gossip magazine could say about me.

Tonight, we should be celebrating. Jaxx just landed his biggest job as a stuntman to date, but instead, he’s packing. Jaxx is leaving and I’m sitting on the couch. I’m not crying, speaking or even moving. I’m numb even though my mind won’t shut up. I want to tell him I’m sorry and beg him to stay, but he doesn’t want to anymore. From the beginning, I knew this day would come, but I had no idea how bad it was going to hurt. I’ve been preparing for this day, but there is no real preparation for losing the person you love, to let them walk away while you sit by and do nothing. The worst part...I’ve caused this. I only have myself to blame.

Jaxx walks into the living room. Two bags hang from his shoulder and one he rolls behind him. My chin quivers but I lock my jaw trying to stop it. I can’ let him know how badly this is killing me. His blue eyes are on me, I can feel them, but I refuse to turn towards him. The sound of his feet shuffling against the hardwood floor almost causes me to turn my head. Jaxx clears his throat. “That’s most of my stuff. I’ll get the rest while you’re at work next time.” I nod my head. Jaxx sighs and I swear it sounds like a bomb goes off when he does. “That’s it? You’re just going to freaking nod your head. You have nothing to say to me. I don’t even deserve a goodbye from you after almost three years!”

“Bye.” My voice sounds weak, barely a whisper.

“I don’t know why you’re doing this, Kenn. You know I love you. You know I want to be with you, so why are you pushing so hard for me to leave right now?” His voice breaks. I rise from my position on the couch, but I still don’t look at him. My legs feel like pudding.

“You were going to leave anyways someday, might as well be now,” I reply.

His fist slams down on the couch. “Is that how little you think of me? Where in the hell did I go wrong? Did I not tell you enough how much I cared and what you meant to me? Do you not understand how much I love you?”

Every piece of my soul breaks with each word he says. I’ll never be repaired from this break. There is no coming back from this. I swallow past the lump of emotion in my throat. “Goodbye, Jaxx.” It’s the last two words I say to him before I head to our bedroom...my bedroom. That word ‘my’ turns my stomach into acid. I shut the door in the room where he always made me feel loved and beautiful, now it’s empty and hollow. The memories these walls hold are too much to bear. I slide down the door until I’m sitting on the floor. Jaxx releases a frustrated roar out in the silent house before he walks out the front door. The slam is his grand exit, the finale, if you will.

The sobs that break free of my body...are my awakening.

One

Kenndrix

As I land back in the sunny, but smog-filled Los Angeles, I feel a sense of normalcy taking over my body. Being gone for two weeks was almost a form of torture. Ronin’s idea seemed like a God sent when he first pitched the idea to me and I was fine the first few days, but after that things started to tire me. Spending two weeks in an exclusive, exotic island where there is barely any cell or internet service, and even fewer people should be a dream come true, especially when you call Los Angeles home. Getting away from the crowded streets and hordes of people held its appeal, but it didn’t last.

Ronin and I had an entire side of the island to ourselves. The quiet was relaxing until it became eerie. The fact that my phone didn’t chime or buzz with an email or something else work related every five minutes, was a nice break until I started to miss work and my family and friends.

Once I make my way through the airport and retrieve my luggage, I head outside and grab a cab. The minute I’m situated in the back seat I dial the number of my best friend. Kynlee picks up on the second ring. “I swear, if you ever make me go two weeks without having a one on one conversation again...I will hunt you down, kill you and then bring you back to life just so we can talk.”

I laugh at Kynlee’s dramatics. Though she might be little she is fierce. All five-feet-two inches of her. Kynlee James, has been my best friend since she stood up to a bully for me in school. We’ve been inseparable ever since. Even after she had to move our sophomore year of high school, we managed to stay close. After graduation, she moved back to Los Angeles and life got interesting for both of us. It’s funny to see how far she’s come. When Kynlee first got back to Los Angeles, her plan was to become a lingerie model then a playmate. Instead, she’s married and soon to be mom of two. Instead of a lingerie model, she became a teacher. “Oh, Kyn, I’ve missed you!”

Kynlee huffs on the other end of the line. “I can promise I missed you more. Remember, I was still stuck in Los Angeles while you were relaxing and soaking up the sun in Golcier Archipelago.”

“And working.” I’m not sure why I just admitted that to her. Kynlee will lecture me until tomorrow now. The phone line is eerily quiet on the other end. “You okay over there?”

“Yep! I’m just trying to figure out if I have wax in my ear because I could swear you just told me you worked while you were on vacation with your boyfriend on a remote island.”

I sigh. “You know how a thought process works. You have to write it down when it hits.”

“Yes, I understand that concept and I’ve even witnessed it with you before, but writing down a quick thought process wouldn’t be considered working in my book,” she explains.

It’s a good thing she can’t see my face right now, because I grimace before admitting, “Well, it was more than just a thought process.”

Three beats later, Kynlee asks, “How much more?”

“Three movie scripts and possibly something for TV.” I begin to twirl a loose strand of my hair as I wait for her lecture to start.

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