Page 27 of Autumn Skies & Pumpkin Pies

I was shocked when Mase showed up at my house. We haven’t really talked in years, but he insisted on me coming out with him tonight. Going out was really low on my list of priorities. I had done my fair share of partying in my younger years. To be honest, I was over it. There was also the constant worry in the back of my mind. Warbee had suffered from cancer. I couldn’t shake that shit and it’s messing with my damn head. However, Mase is persistent and annoying about it so eventually I gave in.

Blue Bar is the local hole in the wall bar. Every town has one, even the smallest towns. It’s small and smoky from the years of cigarette smoke the building has seen. The wood paneling on the wall has absorbed so much of it there’s no chance of escaping the smell. It’s dimly lit with little blue light fixtures above each worn wooden table. There’s a small dance floor, stage, and a jukebox that’s used more than the stage has ever been. Pool table and darts are tucked away in a corner. The beer is cheap, but it does what most people want, to numb your worries or pain for a period of time. Blue Bar is a bit run down, but it’s a staple in our community.

When Mase and I arrive, the bar isn’t too crowded for a Saturday night. I’m preoccupied as we play pool. Mase asks all kinds of questions to which I reply mostly in one worded answers. If I hurt his feelings it doesn’t show. All I want is for Warbee to get back to Blue Ridge so I can pull her into my arms. “So, how was playing in the NFL?” Mase asks.

I have to resist the urge to roll my eyes at him. This was the question that I never understood why it got asked. “Well, it was a dream come true. It’s everything I could have hoped for, but it was also a hell of a lot harder than I expected.”

“Really?”

I nod my head. “Yeah, you think Coach Brime was rough back in the day...it’s nothing compared to the NFL. At the start of every preseason you spend more time throwing up from trying to get back into playing shape than anything else.”

Mase whistles. “I’m not sure I could have done that.”

“If you love it the way I do, you would have.”

“True. So, you and Warbee back together now? I’ve heard all about it from some of the guys around town.” Mase takes his shot and makes it. He was always much better at pool than football but no matter what he gave it his all. I can respect that.

A thought occurs to me, so I decide to run with it. “Yeah, for the most part. I mean we’re kind of in limbo right now, but we’ll get through it.” Mase nods and takes another shot and sinks it, too. “Hey, I got a question.”

“Yeah, what is it?” he asks, never looking up from his next target.

Taking a deep breath, I decide to dive right in. “What do you know about Warbee’s ex Kaden?”

Mase looks up, clearly thrown off by my question. “What do you mean? I know he’s with Beth now.”

“Yeah, I saw that, too. Poor guy, but I was more curious as to why they broke up.” I’m fishing for answers that I know I should wait and get from Warbee, herself, but I’m hoping Mase takes the bait.

Mase sighs. “That was a shit show. I never liked Kaden. Warbee has always been a good girl. After y’all broke up I kind of still looked out for her you know. Then she got sick and she’d only been dating Kaden for a few months, but they never seemed really serious. About a week after she was diagnosed, he broke up with her. He used some excuse, but really it was just because he didn’t want to have to help take care of her when things got bad, you know. I still can’t stand that guy.”

My blood boils at the thought that Kaden, a man who was supposed to be her boyfriend and someone she could rely on through thick or thin, just left her hanging when she needed him the most. If I saw him right now, I’d probably punch him straight in his nose. “What a shit move,” I comment.

“Yeah, none of the town was too happy with him. Well, except Beth but you know how she is.” Mase gets back to the game while my mind wanders to Warbee everything she’s been through. I wish she was here right now.

A couple of hours later, Mase challenges me to a game of darts. It seems like an okay idea, so we move over to one of the dart boards. Then I get that sense of her being near and when I look up, I see her on the dance floor line dancing next to Teaganne. My entire world falls away as I watch the smile on her face. If she’s smiling like that it must mean her doctor’s appointment went okay. I watch as she leaves the dance floor and heads to a table. As if she can sense me as well, she looks up, our eyes lock and I’m too damn far away to read anything running through them then she turns around. I hand the darts and beer in my hands to Mase without ever letting my eyes leave her. “I’ll be right back.”

When I reach her, I tell her we need to talk. My tone is harsher than I expect, and I don’t know what she sees in my eyes when she finally meets them again, but she takes off jogging out of the bar like a bat out of hell. I chase after her because I’m not letting her go again. Once I get outside, I find her easy enough. “Oh no you don’t,” I call out. I surge forward, my knee screams in protest, but I move on anyways. I’m just buzzed enough to reach her, wrap my arms around her waist and pull her back against me. “Why the hell are you running?”

All of her gusto dies out. “Because I can’t do this.”

“Do what? Talk to me?”

I release her and she steps away from me before turning around to face me. “I can’t talk about what you’re wanting to talk about.”

“How do you know what I want to talk about? You haven't spoken to me since you practically ran away at Bushels of Fun.” I cross my arms over my chest.

Warbee huffs in frustration. “I’m sorry. I know I keep running and I know that’s not fair to you, but I can’t deal with all this.”

“I’m not asking you to deal with anything. I’m asking you to have a conversation with me.” I didn’t think asking for her to talk to me would be so difficult, but then Warbee is used to being on her own. It’s just how she’s wired. It’s one of the things I loved about her, but it’s also very frustrating. I step forward and cup her face with my hands. “Please, darlin’. Talk to me.”

Tears well in her eyes. “There’s really nothing to say except I’ll always love you, Rocker, but you need to let me go.”

“How in the hell am I supposed to do that?” I ask, as I throw my hands up in the air. Frustration takes over. “You can’t tell me you will always love me and then ask me to let you go.”

“Rocker, I can’t give what you want,” she says, her voice breaks and she hugs herself so tightly, I’m afraid she’s literally breaking.

I surge forward once more and pull her into my arms. “Why don’t you let me be the judge of that?” She shakes her head. “What is it that you think I want, Warbee?”

“A future, a family.”

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