Page 2 of Autumn Wishes and Pumpkin Kisses

My spur of the moment decision may have been both a blessing and curse. I followed my heart for the first time in my life, but the love didn’t last or at least hers didn’t. I should have known you couldn’t keep a girl so full of life and wanderlust. They only break your heart.

ONE

Keefer

I load the last box into the bed of my Ford truck then walk around to secure the tarp in case any stray rain showers decide to grace us with their presence. I stare at my condo one last time. Well, technically it will still be mine, but in the form of a rental property. I think some part of me knew I’d wind back up in Blue Ridge eventually. No matter where I was in the world, that was the place I called home. Blue Ridge is one of those places that when you grow up within the community, you can’t wait to run as far away as fast as possible. Growing up with Warbee and Teaganne, we always discussed our plans for the future. On the top of that list was to get out of Blue Ridge, well for Teaganne and I it was. Warbee was always content with small town living. It suited her, which I guess is why she never really left unless necessary. Teaganne and I ran away as fast as possible after graduation.

Following her seemed to make all the sense in the world. She was a wild child that had a heart of gold and a soul made of wanderlust. She captivated me in every way possible. I fell in love with her before I ever knew what love actually was. Sadly, it took years for me to actually figure out that she felt the same and do something about it. Our time together was as brief as autumn is a season, but it was real and huge. Overwhelming and consuming.

I sigh as I turn away from the place I’ve called home the last few years. Oddly, I’m not sad about leaving Atlanta. I’m actually ready to leave the hustle and bustle of the big city behind. I’m ready for the small town quiet and Sunday morning gossip. I just know that Blue Ridge won’t be the same without her presence, but I have no right to even consider that. Teaganne is a married woman now and a mom of two. She is a big time fashion designer who is often splattered on the cover of some sleazy gossip magazine while I buy groceries. She’s as gorgeous as ever, but there is a dullness to her eyes. Almost as if she isn’t happy. I find myself constantly pushing that from my mind, because it isn’t my issue to worry over but it’s always there, sitting and waiting for me to revisit.

No matter what happened or how she broke my heart, I only ever wanted her to be happy in life. She’s got all the success she ever wanted and then some, so I’m uncertain about why she would be unhappy, but it's there. I can see it lurking in those honey brown eyes. For a while, I figured it was just the pictures that made her look like that. The horror stories of paparazzi and how they manipulate pictures to make them seem something completely different than what they had me assuming that was the case, but then we all ended up back in Blue Ridge.

It’s not odd for me to show up in Blue Ridge. My parents still live there and now my older brother Ketih has moved back as well. Warbee, who is like a sister to me, is still there, so I have visited often throughout the years. However, when Teaganne showed back up in Blue Ridge, I think it shocked everyone. She doesn’t visit often and when she does it’s fleeting. This time was different. Teaganne stayed for a while, long enough to the rumor mill flying around the town. It kept the gossip musketeers busy for weeks. There’s a group of three elderly sisters, Rose, Lily and Daisy, who make up the gossip musketeers. If you ever need to get the down low on anything going on in Blue Ridge, they are the ladies to see.

Teaganne and I spoke for the first time in years. Well, since Warbee, who is our mutual ground, needed both of us. It’d been at least five years, but the moment Teaganne reappeared it was like staring at the sun. Blinding, warm and overwhelming happiness. I knew she shattered my heart over a decade ago and I won’t lie, most days I can still feel the shards of glass coursing through my veins. Her absence is felt everywhere, like the wind. In that moment though, I couldn’t find an ounce of anger because looking at her, remembering my time with her and how alive she made me feel, it was staggering and suddenly, the pain didn’t matter. Sadly, that didn’t last. The pain returned with time, but it’s something I’ve learned to deal with. It reminds me I’m alive.

As I climb into my truck, I put my phone on Bluetooth and find my favorite playlist. As I pull into traffic, I bid Atlanta farewell. Of course, I’ll be back. My tech company is still based here but I have some capable hands to take care of it. It’s time to go home. To truly settle down and figure out who exactly I am and what I want from life. I’m not getting any younger and dwelling on the past isn’t getting me anywhere. It’s past time for me to let go of Teaganne and what I thought my life would be, and build a new future for myself. Blue Ridge is my home and I’m coming back.

“I still can’t believe you’re leaving,” Luke, my neighbor, says. I look over to see the cowboy turned corporate bigwig heading my direction in a three piece suit that probably costs more than most people make in a year.

I chuckle. “I told you I was.” Luke was basically the only real friend I managed to make here in Atlanta. We both bought one of the modern condos a couple of months apart. We’re close in age and both ambitious enough to not have time for romantic relationships, although I feel like we both have a story or two to tell that really has to do with why. Mine is Teaganne and I’ve always been curious what his story was, but it’s not my place to ask. Luke gives me a look like I’m crazy. When I first told him my plan to move back to Blue Ridge, he let it be known that he thought I’d lost my mind. He originally came from another small town himself and apparently has no desire to ever return. To be honest, I didn’t really think I’d be going back either if you had asked me a few years ago, but I just know this is the right thing for me.

Luke shakes his head. His sandy blonde hair brushes the collar of his suit jacket. “Man, I really think you should reconsider what you’re doing. I mean, if you’re unhappy in the condo you could still rent it out and stay with me until you find another place to buy. Maybe, you’d be happier in a house.”

“Maybe I’d be happier back in Blue Ridge.” I raise my eyebrows in challenge to Luke.

He sighs. “I just think you’re making a big mistake.”

“I understand. I do. Honestly, if you had asked me a few years ago, I would have told you there’s no way in the world I’m going back to Blue Ridge to live but things have changed.”

I climb out of the truck and walk around to lean against the tailgate of my truck and Luke does the same. “How so?”

“I feel lost. There’s something pulling me back home. Maybe, because it’s the last place I remember truly being myself. A place where I was happy and things like money, stocks, housing markets and what did not matter. I’m lost in the hustle and bustle of the big city, sinking into the greed for the next dollar that I don’t even need. I have enough money to retire right now and live a happy, comfortable life until the day I die, yet in this place we run around chasing the next dollar as if we need it. I can’t and don’t want to do it anymore. For a lot of people, this life will always suit them but for me...it just doesn’t anymore.” I sigh and stare at the horizon. The sun will be setting soon, but the noise from the city beyond our neighborhood takes away from the beauty of it.

“I still don’t get it, but you go do you. Keep in touch though.”

I nod my head. “Of course. You take care and if you ever need to clear your head, you’re welcome to visit me in Blue Ridge.”

For a moment, he looks like he’s actually considering my offer. A part of me really wishes he would. I think if he could get away from here, he might realize this city isn’t everything it’s hyped up to be. “You never know,” he finally replies. “Have safe travels. I have to get to a dinner meeting.”

I watch as he disappears and I know I probably won’t see or hear from Luke again, unless I have to come back to check on my condo. It’s good, though. I’m heading back home to friends and family that love me and hopefully I’ll find my happiness along the way.

TWO

Teaganne

They say home is where the heart is. Growing up, I always associated home with a place. A certain town, one particular house, something that I found myself constantly running from. I could never wait to get out of my small town of Blue Ridge, Georgia. Blue Ridge wasn’t always the place my family called home, but for the good portion of my life, it was. Don’t get me wrong, Blue Ridge is beautiful with kind people and that typical small town lifestyle that we see on a daily basis in the movies. It’s exactly like a Hallmark movie but if you were like me and a little left of center and full of wanderlust for the great unknown, Blue Ridge wasn’t the place for you.

I had big dreams and even a bigger imagination. My goal was to get accepted into one of the top fashion design schools in the country after graduating high school with my two best friends, Warbee and Keefer. Afterwards, I’d run as fast as I could to Los Angeles, graduate at the top of my class before heading to New York to take the fashion world by storm. I’ve always been into fashion, another reason I didn’t quite fit in with the small town folk of Blue Ridge. Everything I wore was ordered online and probably a bit outrageous in their eyes but it made me feel...well, like me.

I had my plan and everything was on track until my heart decided it needed something, no strike that, someone more than my dreams. Keefer Dunn. One of my best friends. Now, the crush was nothing new. I’d had a crush on him since I rolled into town, and saw him riding his bike alongside Warbee as they left the library. My crush was easy enough to ignore until Keefer decided to notice me too. However, I needed to be the one in control, so our love affair was the best kept secret of Blue Ridge. To this day I don’t think most people know we were anything more than friends.

Foolishly, I thought if I kept our growing relationship a secret that I could still run away from Blue Ridge when the time came. Problem was, I couldn't. I couldn’t leave him behind the way I had intended. My heart refused to stay on track and being somewhat of a romantic, a trait I like to blame Warbee and romance books for, I followed my heart. I asked Keefer to come with me and he agreed.

I know what you’re thinking. Happily ever after. End of story. Wrong! Keefer and I didn’t get our happily ever after. Instead, we arrived in Los Angeles. I excelled in my fashion classes. Caught the eye of some pretty big investors. One in particular wanted more from me than just my eye for design. He dangled all the pretty things of the world in front of me. I was just young and naive enough to believe him. My wanderlust got the best of me and the next thing I knew, I was gone. On a plane to New York, leaving Keefer and a large chunk of my heart behind with him. Was it a mistake? Most definitely. Do I regret my decision? No, not one bit. I may not be happy with the course my life took for a few years there, but I can say I got the two best gifts anyone could ask for. Unexpected surprises. Of course, my life in New York derailed one rainy afternoon and the next thing I knew, I was packing bags and heading back home, to Blue Ridge.

It’s funny, I spent so much time running from this one place only to wind right back up in it. Only now, I can truly see it for what it’s for. I’m content to call Blue Ridge home. I’ve also learned a thing or two along the way. Home is where the heart is but the thing about that statement is...your heart belongs to the people you love. Your family. Your friends. The people you tell all your secrets to. Who give you a shoulder to cry on. The ones who laugh along with your joy and feel your pain. Home isn’t a town, house or any other materialistic item. Home is found in the people you surround yourself with. Home is where your heart is and your heart belongs to the people you love.

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