Page 12 of Autumn Leaves and Pumpkins Please

Rolling over in my bed, I stare at the ceiling above me. My hands itch. The sign that I need to drown them in paint. That incessant need to do something more. The stark white ceiling above me is a blank canvas in my mind. I have a few hours to kill before I head into work. Warbee had called yesterday afternoon at some point. When I got back home last night and finally checked my voicemails, she had told me I was only allowed to work half a day today. A part of me wanted to call and tell her I’d be at the bakery bright and early, but it was late, and I knew it would be useless.

After Jayse and I kissed, we climbed back into the truck, and he continued down the dirt road to a small hill. We collected the food which had gone cold, but was still as delicious and sat on top of the hill and watched the world around us. It was quiet and peaceful. Looking out over the trees, it felt like it was just Jayse and I in the world. When we arrived back at his house, he had walked me to my door, pressed a light kiss to my forehead, and then disappeared into the night. I didn’t bother to turn on the lights in my apartment as I rushed to the windows that faced the alley. I watched as he slowly made his way back to his house. The way his body seemed to be turned in on itself...I could tell he was having conflicting emotions. I still didn’t know his past. I wish I did. There was a part of me that had hoped he would share with me once I started talking about my own, but he didn’t. Sure, I could ask Warbee or even Teaganne. Blue Ridge is small and even Jayse said the entire town knew his past, but I’d rather hear it from him.

A knock on my front door causes both Thora and I to jump. Quickly, I climb out of bed and make my way down the stairs. I take a moment to look out of the peep hole and see Jayse standing there. Quickly, I spin around to look at my reflection in the mirror. My hair looks similar to a bird's nest. There are indents on my face from where I had slept in the same position for so long. Underneath my eyes are puffy from sleep. Oh well, there’s no helping this right now I realize when another knock comes from the door. Taking a deep breath, I pull it open. Jayse’s scent rushes in and invades every sense I have. It really should be illegal to smell so good. Concentration isn't possible with him around. His hair is down and loose, looking a bit windblown which makes me think he’s been on his motorcycle. “Good morning, Bright Eyes.”

An airy laugh escapes me and I’m not quite sure what that’s all about. “Good morning to you, too.”

Jayse holds up a bag of greasy food with a smile large enough to put his dimples on full display. “More food?”

“You need to eat,” he comments, as he moves around me to enter the apartment. Thora comes rushing over towards him. Her purrs fill the silence of the apartment.

“I do eat.”

I watch as he sits the bag down on my tiny table and scoops up Thora who is rubbing against his legs. “How are you this morning, Beautiful?”

Laughter bubbles out of me once more. “I never would have guessed you had such a soft spot for cats.”

His broad shoulders shrug and he smiles. “I like all animals just about. By the way, I didn’t mean the food comment like that. Confession time…. I don’t like to eat alone. It’s why I’m never in any of the restaurants in town. I’ll get food to go, but I won’t go in and sit down. I don’t know why, but I just don’t feel comfortable.”

A smile hits my face. There’s something about Jayse that seems fearless and indestructible, so to hear him confess something like this has caught me off guard, but it also makes my heart flutter. He trusted me enough to let me know something about him that I’m pretty sure most people don’t know. “I would have never guessed that.”

“So, give me a confession.” He winks. Sometimes, I don’t think he realizes how devastatingly handsome he truly is.

As I head towards the table, he walks around and pulls my chair out for me. I can honestly say that this has never been done for me before, but I don’t hate it. “You mean, more confessions than what I gave you yesterday.”

“Okay, that’s fair.” He takes a seat with Thora in his lap. He pulls out two bottles of chocolate milk and two breakfast sandwiches from Burger Hop’s breakfast menu. They are so good, but messy as hell. I’m a little embarrassed to eat this in front of him. “How about something you’ve always wanted to do?”

Of course, he asks the question right as I take an overly large bite of the breakfast sandwich. He watches with an amused smile as I try to chew and quietly as possible. Finally, I’m able to answer the question. It’s the easiest thing I’ve ever been asked. “Have you seen Princess Diaries?”

“The movie?” I nod my head. “Yeah, I have.”

My eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “I’m impressed.”

He laughs, a full belly laugh. It’s a deep rumble that causes goosebumps to coat my skin. “Don’t be too impressed. I have a sister in case you didn’t know.” I did know that, but we’ll pretend I didn’t. “So, what about Princess Diaries?”

I’ve never admitted this to anyone before, so it feels odd to even say it out loud. “Do you remember the scene where Mia and her mom have the canvas full of balloons that are filled with different colors of paint, and they throw darts at them?”

His eyes shine with knowledge. Jayse already knows where I’m going with this. “I do remember.”

Sighing, I admit, “I’ve always wanted to do that.”

Jayse turns around and surveys the room. “Well, you’re an artist and you definitely have enough space so why haven’t you?”

“I wasn’t sure how to rig it up honestly. Plus, I kind of suck at throwing darts. I feel like I’d miss more of the balloons than I’d pop.”

“It does seem like it’d be more fun with someone to help as well.” I can see mischief in his eyes, but I don’t even bother to ask. “Do you work today?” he asks.

“Yeah, half of the day anyways. Just this afternoon until closing. Warbee is still requesting I take it easy,” I tell him, my eyes narrowing into a glare that I don’t feel.

Jayse holds up his large hands in surrender. My eyes are drawn to the scars on the inside of his palm. I had never noticed them before. I think back to all of the times he’s touched me, and I realize it’s never been with this hand. Before I can think about it, my hand reaches forward and locks with his. He flinches. “Capri…”

“Stop hiding it. Stop hiding from me. I didn’t even realize your palm was burned like this.”

“Good. I make it a point to not touch people with it.” He looks away from our clasped hands in disgust.

I shake my head, unable to understand. “Why?”

Abruptly, Jayse releases my hand and stands up. “I need to get to work. I’ll talk to you later but make sure you take it easy.” He pauses beside my chair. I hold my breath. Uncertainty controls my body right now, but just when I think there’s no hope he leans down and presses a kiss to the top of my head. Calmly and quietly, he leaves. When the door shuts behind him, I turn to look at it. Why? I don’t know. It’s not as if it holds any answers but it feels like a part of me just left with Jayse. I just want to ease his pain that he won’t even admit he carries. It’s easy to see if you know what to look for. Clearly, everything has to do with how his body got burned, but I also know he’s not going to talk until he’s ready.

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