Barker shakes his head then runs his hand over his face. “Shit,” he mumbles.
“I’m sorry, Barker.”
He holds up his hand to stop me. “Look, I’m not going to lie. I’m angry and I’m hurt that you kept this from me and I know we need to deal with it, if we can, but right now what’s going on between us isn’t important. You need to turn around and go back into the hospital. That’s what is important.”
“Barker, please, just let me explain,” I plead with him.
“Not now, Annistyn. We both know where you need to be right now. You only left his room because I was here and you thought you could keep me from finding out, so please go back inside and be with your dad. We can talk later.” Barker pushes away from the wall and walks toward me. He stops and presses a kiss to my forehead. “I’m going to leave I called Drake already, but I’ll see you later.”
The tears prick the back of my eyes because this feels like goodbye. This feels final and not a ‘see you later’. I listen as his footsteps fade away into the night. My heart is heavy because I know this is it. We won’t talk later.
****
The next few days were torture. It was like being stuck in a nightmare that I couldn’t wake up from, no matter how hard I tried. Once my dad had passed, Jerick had gone missing once again.I didn’t have time to worry about his absence though. I had to take care of my dad’s last wishes. Luckily, I had Talon and Vienna to help as well as Landrey, who seemed to be around more often than not.
Landrey had been here at the apartment every day. She was either fixing or bringing food, cleaning something, or doing laundry for us. It was odd, but also comforting. Landrey was just one of those genuinely good people and it showed. I also thought that maybe something was going on with her and Talon, but I wasn’t sure, and to be honest I wasn’t in the mood to ask about someone’s relationship. My heart had gone missing from my chest. I had lost two of the three men I loved in one night. Talon was my true and steady as always but the absence of my dad and Barker haunted me constantly.
Barker had been around, but he kept his distance. I didn’t know what was worse. Missing him and then him showing up, but not being able to go to him and wrap my arms around him or him not being here at all. Every time he was in the same place as me my heart would race, our eyes would meet but the underlying truth that I had kept hidden remained between us. We were sinking in the ocean and there was no way to pull us out at the moment. Keeping the truth about Jerick from him made him feel as if I didn’t trust him and I had no valid reason for keeping that information except I was scared of this… of losing him for good.
The Sons of Sin had been great. They had given me time off from work, but I also knew that I wouldn’t be returning to the Sinner’s Den. I couldn’t go back there and work with Barker. It was just too hard. My heart hurt too much. Besides, I wouldn’t need that much income now. My dad had a small life insurance policy that took care of his cremation and any outstanding bills he had. I’d graduate next month with my degree in nursing and then I could get a real job. I already had one lined up at one of the local clinics in Los Angeles.
Adjusting to everything was the hardest. Sometimes I felt fine, then other times, I’d burst out crying for no reason. Vienna and Landrey kept telling me that was perfectly normal—but was it? Sometimes I thought I was going crazy and everyone around me was too scared to tell me.
I’m sitting on the couch eatingFun-Yumsand drinking aMountain Dew, which is basically all I’ve been living off of—yes, I know that’s not healthy. There are a ton of casseroles in the fridge, but I don’t care. I want the comfort the salty bag of goodness brings me. Talon walks into the room with a worried look on his face. “What’s wrong?”
“I just got a call from Barker. I need to be at the clubhouse as soon as possible. Emergency meeting,” he explains.
We had both been waiting for the call. The one that would ultimately decide Talon’s fate within the club. I was holding out hope that they wouldn’t punish him for being my friend, which gave him a connection to Jerick, but it sounded like I might have been hoping for nothing. It just wasn’t fair.
“I’m sorry, Talon.”
Talon shakes his head. “No, it’s not your fault. We can’t help who we are related to by blood, Annistyn. We only get to choose who we call family. You’re my family and I’ll pick you over the Sons of Sin any day of the week.” He leaned over and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. “I’ll be back in a few.” Then he’s out the door. I sit back and sigh. I never wanted Talon to have to give up something to be friends with me. This week sucks.
****
Barker
All the current members of the Sons of Sin are sitting around the table. We’re just waiting on Talon. I was dreading this. I mean, the guy was great and he was someone I really considered an asset to the club, but every time I see him, I think of her and it hurts so damn much.
My mood has been in the pits since the night I found out Jerick was Annistyn’s twin brother. I still couldn’t figure out why she hadn’t told me. I guess while I was falling in love with her, she wasn’t falling in love with me. I mean, if she couldn’t bother to tell me she was Jerick’s sister, then I didn’t really matter. Annistyn didn’t trust me for some reason and that realization freaking hurt.
There’s a knock on the door and Talon enters. His dark eyes take in all of us sitting around this table and I know what he’s thinking. Hell, if I were in his shoes, I’d be thinking the same thing. Drake stands. “Talon, thank you for coming on such short notice.” Technically, this duty falls on my shoulders as the president of Sons of Sin but Drake understands I just can’t handle the situation at the moment so he volunteered.
“You ring, I come. That’s how it goes, right?” By the way Talon’s muscles are tensed, I think he’s preparing for the worse.
Drake nods. “Yes, it is. You’ve been a prospect with us for almost a year now, and throughout that time you have shown that you were willing to stand up for all of these brothers. You were willing to defend the club and do the right thing for other citizens in the town. That’s what a Sons of Sin member does. However, there was a conflict of interest brought to our attention recently that has made us question your loyalty. So, I have to ask: why didn’t you mention knowing Jerick Tarantino?”
Talon clears his throat, but keeps his head held high. “Honestly, it didn’t seem important. He was no longer a person involved in my life.”
“Even though Annistyn, your roommate, and best friend, is his sister?” Drake questions.
“Annistyn is my family. I’d do anything for her. Jerick tried to pull her down the same path, but I managed to save her and I’d do it again. Yes, by blood she is Jerick’s twin sister, even though they don’t resemble one another much, but no, he’s not her brother. When you look around this room, what do you see?” Talon pauses, letting the question hang in the air. “I see a family. I see a group of brothers. It doesn’t matter if they have actual Sons of Sin blood running through their veins, because they would do anything for this club and for anyone of you. You don’t get to pick whose blood runs in your veins. You only get to pick who you call family. Jerick hasn’t been Annistyn’s family in years. So, no I didn’t mention knowing him or her being related, because in my world, it was irrelevant. It wasn’t a conflict of interest for me. I knew who my family was, Annistyn, my mom, my siblings, this club; but I also knew who wasn’t, and Jerick fell under that category. I won’t lie, once upon a time I thought I could save him too. He had been my friend but I couldn’t, and I realized that and I had to let him go.”
Damn, I had to give Talon props. He wasn't afraid to say exactly what he felt. “What if you were asked to pick between this club and Annistyn?”
Talon scoffs. “Well, first of all, I’d say I’d be disappointed because I thought this club was better than that. I didn’t think they’d judge someone in that way. Second of all, I’d tell you I’d pick Annistyn. Blood or not, that girl is my family. She is my sister and I won’t turn my back on her. She is caring, funny, sweet, smart, stubborn, and sarcastic as hell, but she’s one of the best damn people you could ever meet. You’ll love her instantly, which I think Barker can attest to.”
All eyes fall on me. Shit. How did he know? Or did he know? After a few moments of silence, I look up. “Come on Drake, get on with it.”