Page 14 of Pedal to the Metal

Laying on my bed staring at this ridiculous room I feel that dread wash over me. Before I can even take a breath, it’s growing, drowning me, suffocating me, and wrapping me up tightly in a blanket. A thought occurs to me, maybe I can go stay with Farrah for a few days. On her first visit she told me I was more than welcome to stay at her place anytime. Well, were about to find out just how much she meant that. I get up quickly and grab an overnight bag. I dump all my necessities in the bottom and toss some clothes on top. Getting into my car I tell myself that I just need to escape for a few days.

When I pull into Farrah’s little driveway I see Connor’s car is still here. I grab my bag and march up to her front door before I can back out. I ring the doorbell and wait for Farrah. When she answers I can tell she’s been asleep her eyes are puffy, her hairs a mess and I bet her robe is the only thing she has on. She looks alarmed to see me standing at her front door in the middle of the night with a bag in my hand. “On your first visit you told me I could stay with you anytime; did you mean that?”

“Of course, I did!” She exclaims and steps back, so I can come in. “But is everything okay?”

The minute she asks I feel something in me break and the tears fall freely I shake my head, “No, I don’t think so.” Farrah pulls me into her arms and rubs my back. She tells me we’ll figure it out and she’s right we will, but I don’t know how.

Chapter 9

Jagger

It’s been four days since I kissed Londynn and I still don’t know what the hell I was thinking. Kissing Londynn hadn’t been my best decision, I knew better, tasting her was like taking an exotic trip but knowing it’s going to end you’re going to come back home to your small house and your normal life. Right now, I needed something to distract my mind from Londynn. I’ve worked at the body shop all day but decide to hit the gym with Ace anyways.

I spot Ace the minute I pull into the parking lot. Were half way through our workout when these two girls who have been checking us out finally make their way over. Both are your typical blonde California girl. Nothing that I’m interested in, but they could distract me from Londynn. I’m not sure what is going on between Ace and Kynlee but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be okay with the way he’s flirting right now. Ace eventually tells the girls to meet us at JamesTown in an hour.

An hour later I’m parking in front of the body shop before using the shortcut through the buildings. I spot my brother, “Ace!”

Ace turns around and flashes me his cocky grin, “So you decided to show up after all.”

“Yeah, I had nothing else to do," I reply with a shrug.

He laughs, “Really? No Londynn Parrish to make out with?” He asks taunting me with his tone and knowing eye.

I sneer at him, “What the hell do you know about it?”

He leans against the door blocking my way. “I know enough. I know that Londynn and you have some kind of thing going on and I know the girl can kiss.” Then he winks before opening the door and disappearing through it.

How the hell did he know she could kiss? Had Ace kissed Londynn? Or was he just trying to get under my skin? Whatever, the reason it was working. I catch up and grab his shoulder. “How would you know Londynn can kiss?”

Ace raises his eyebrow before that cocky grin returns. “Well, let’s think about that, shall we?” He gets quiet and rubs his chin, “Oh! That’s right, I kissed her that’s how I know.”

“Why?”

“Because her boyfriend was a douche and she needed some attention and I’m never one to abandon a damsel in distress," Ace answers with a shrug.

I shake my head because I can’t picture Londynn as a damsel in distress the girl had too many damn walls built around herself to be in distress. Besides Ace is nothing but a womanizer for whatever reason. He knows he’s gotten under my skin, but he forgot I can play that game too. “So, what’s going on with you and Kynlee? Trouble in paradise?”

“Mind your own damn business," Ace says before shoving past me.

I follow right on his heels, “What I’d say man? I’m just asking where Kynlee is, that girl sure is a looker.”

“Will you shut the hell up already?” Ace bellows in the empty hallway.

I chuckle, “Touchy, touchy. Looks like I hit a nerve but a word of advice little brother. Go home to Kynlee. Those two fake blondes waiting on us in there don’t even hold a candle. If you keep pushing Kynlee away eventually she’ll leave and not come back. Girls like her don’t come around all the time, especially for guys like us. So, go home Ace.”

He shakes his head and stands there thinking over my words. Eventually he turns around and heads back the way we came but before he reaches the door he turns back to me, “Girls like Londynn don’t either. Go home Jagger.”

I stand there letting Ace’s words sink in. He’s right girls like Londynn don’t come around all the time either and especially for a guy like me but things between us can never be. Londynn is like champagne and I’m beer. You can’t drink champagne on beer money. All I have is beer money. I could never give Londynn the life she’s used to or deserves. That kiss has really messed with me, mainly because I hadn’t had a kiss feel like that since Harlyn. I thought I’d never feel like that again and even if I could I won’t let myself. I don’t deserve to move on and even if Harlyn’s death wasn’t my fault I couldn’t handle any more pain like that. I barely survived the pain from losing her and Harper.

I shake my head trying to knock the images of Harlyn and Londynn from my head as I head for the bar. Once I step inside I see Farrah fixing two fruity looking drinks for our two fake blondes. I walk over to them, “Hello ladies," I say as I drape my arms around their shoulders while Farrah glares at me. She doesn’t even ask if I want a drink she just walks off.

****

A few hours later and one of the blondes who I can’t remember her name is in my car. I should be into this but instead I keep thinking about all the differences between her and Londynn. This girl with her fake hair and fake boobs with her barely there clothing is nothing like Londynn. This girl’s scent burns my nose because of her fake designer perfume and it’s like she’s bathed in it. Her body doesn’t mold into mine the way Londynn’s does. I don’t feel like it’s just us in the world and she tastes of alcohol and lipstick. I miss that coconut taste that Londynn had.

The blonde is trying really hard but eventually I have to stop her. I face my steering wheel, “Listen I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought you out here. I can’t do this.”

“Seriously?” The girl snaps back at me and who can blame her. I’ve been a total ass to her basically. I’ve led her on and I don’t even know her name. I reach over and grab her shirt lying in the floor board and apologize again. Before I know it she’s out of the car and I’m sitting alone with my mind back on Londynn. I slam my hand against the steering wheel before rolling down the windows to get rid of her smell that now consumes my car.

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