Page 43 of Pedal to the Metal

“You’re just going to throw away our friendship over some guy?” Alivia yells at Londynn’s retreating back.

Londynn swings back around. “No, you did.” She turns back around and the crowd parts to let her pass. I should go after her, but I can’t make my feet move.

Ryce is still standing with all of us. “Damn she’s freakin’ crazy as shit.”

That comment sends me overboard. When I glance back, I notice Duke wiping something from his car. “Duke looks like you missed a spot man," I tell him right before my fist connects on the one part of Ryce’s face that isn’t bruised or busted. He stumbles back as I shake out my hand. Ace, Bowie, Axell and Connor are all at my side in case any of his friends try anything but of course they don’t. “Don’t you ever talk about my girlfriend like that again because if you do, they’ll have to wire your jaw back together.” I turn around and leave through the crowd the same way Londynn did.

As I near my car I see her head of honey colored hair leaning against it. I walk over to her and meet her dark hazel eyes. I memorize them because there’s a very good chance this will bethe last time I ever see them this close. “Why the hell were you even discussing that?” She asks.

I run a hand through my hair. “Your brother asked, and it just slipped out. I didn’t even know Creed was here, I swear. I’m sorry Londynn.”

“It’s great that you’re sorry Jagger but sorry doesn’t fix the broken heart Creed suffered tonight or our broken trust. How am I supposed to trust you now? How am I supposed to know that whatever I tell you in the future won’t be aired in front of the entire racing community?” The hurt in her eyes breaks my heart in a whole new way. I can’t believe I just blurted out information she had trusted me with.

“You don’t know but all I can do is promise that I won’t do it again and that I am really sorry. I’m sorry that Creed got hurt. I’m sorry the whole crowd found out. But most of all I’m sorry I hurt you. I’ll do whatever I can to make it up to you," I tell her, and I mean it. It’s not just some line to get what I want. It’s the truth. I would do anything to make it up to her. , “Please Londynn.” Inwardly I cringe because I’m standing here begging a girl. I haven’t done that since I was a teenager but if I have to do it again at least I know Londynn’s worth it.

She’s biting her lip and I know she’s trying to keep from crying. She shakes her head. “I don’t know right now Jagger. I have to go find Creed. I’ll call you.” And with that she turns on her heels and walks away from me. Now all I can do is wait and see what she decides.

****

Londynn

As I walk away from Jagger, I let the tears fall. I can’t believe he was just discussing my personal life at the races and with my brother. I really thought I could trust Jagger. I thought he was going to be different but maybe I was wrong. Ugh! And Creed,I can’t even begin to think about how he feels. I wanted to tell him, and I didn’t know how but this was definitely not what I had in mind. I’m walking down the sidewalk when a Jeep pulls up beside me. I see Kynlee inside, “Londynn," she hollers at me. She walks over to me. “Come on you’re going to need some sort of transportation to go after Creed. Take my Jeep but just drop me back off at the races first, okay?”

“Kynlee, thank you for the offer but I can’t just take your Jeep.” I tell her.

She laughs while pulling me towards the open driver’s door. “Of course, you can. Besides it’ll speed everything up. You find Creed and fix things with him then you call Jagger and y’all meet up and fix things and I get to ride home with Ace.”

“I don’t know if I can fix things with Jagger.” Admitting it only makes me want to cry again.

Kynlee leans forward and opens the passenger side compartment box and takes out a package of Kleenex. She takes one out and hands it to me. “Of course, you can. He didn’t mean for all that to break out back there. Jagger isn’t a bad guy. Actually, none of the James’ are. Just hard to love but it’s worth it.”

I think about her words as we slowly make our way back to the races. “Do you love Ace?”

A sad smile appears on her face. “So much but it’s far from easy.”

“Out of all of them he seems like he’d be the most difficult.”

She sighs then turns to face me while I park to let her out. “He is but the more difficult something is the higher the reward. Ace Daniel James is so much more than he seems. He’s terrified of love, and he refuses to admit that he loves anything but I know he does. I know he loves his brothers and his car and his shop. And I know he loves me and someday he’s going to tell me and when he does that’ll be the best day of my life and it’ll makeall of this bullshit we go through worth it. Besides like my mom said once you choose who you love you can’t turn back, you just have to ride the scariest rollercoaster of all. Go find Creed and make sure he’s okay then fix things with Jagger. I think you both deserve a little love and happiness.”

I grab and hug her before she can resist or get out of the Jeep. “So, do you," I whisper in her ear. When she pulls back that sad smile is back, and I can’t help but hope that sometime soon it will be replaced with a happy one. She gets out and as soon as I lose sight of her in the crowd, I back out of the parking spot and head towards the one place I know Creed will be.

****

Once I leave the races, I head for the small public playground on this side of town that is actually next door to the public library, attached to the playground is a small baseball field. Creed had dreams of becoming professional baseball player before he took a scholarship to the private school. We had no sports in our school, all academics which meant he had to give up his dream of baseball, but he was like me. Whenever we needed to think we went to the place that held our dreams, for me a dance studio and for him a baseball field.

As I turn the corner Kynlee’s headlights wash over Creed’s family car. I sigh in relief. I pull in next to the Camry and hop out. While I approach the field, I try to figure out how to fix these things. How do I fix things with Creed? How do I fix things with Jagger? Who knew that the freedom that I craved so badly would be so complicated? As soon as I step through the gate, I see Creed sitting on the small, worn, wood bleachers. Creed looks up as I approach. “Londynn, I don’t want to see you right now.”

I stop in front of him and cross my arms over my chest as if that stance could protect from any hurtful words he might say. “I figured that, and I understand but at least let me explain.”

He eyes glare into mine. “Fine, explain.” I stand there for some time moving my weight between my feet. I’m unsure of how to explain this. “Are you going to explain?” Creed finally asks.

“Yes, I’m just unsure where to start.”

“The truth. How about you start with the truth," Creed tells me like it makes all the sense in the world, and it probably should.

I take a deep breath and release it slowly. “Okay, I wanted to tell you the truth about Alivia and Ryce, but I didn’t want to hurt you.”

He lets out a hard laugh. “As opposed to tonight?”

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