Page 58 of Feeling Blue

“And you don’t never have to. You wanna know why?”

The smirk on her face grew as she shook her head.

“No, because I already know what you’re about to say.”

“What?” his daring smile rested on his face.

“You love big bitches,” her eyes rolled, and he laughed at her.

“That too, but because I love you, Moo. I don’t care if you stay that size or get even bigger. I’ma love every inch.”

“I can’t get too much bigger. I’m already bigger than you, we’re going to look terrible then.”

Auto’s eyebrows knitted together. “What you trying to say? I’m a lil’ nigga? You trying to be funny, Moo?”

“No crazy,” she giggled.

“Good. Better not. As long as I can still pick you up and handle that body, that’s all you need to worry about.”

When she smiled and her eyes closed, Auto’s breathing grew lighter. It had been a long time, and he was still just as lost in her as he had been since the day he’d laid eyes on her. Nova had really been his saving grace, and if he never did another thing in the world, he’d love her, and that was on Granny girl and their baby. Two things he didn’t play about.

“You ready to go home?” she asked him, just as their waitress brought their appetizer out.

He waited until she was gone before answering her. “I’m cool either way. I love being in Dade, but our home is in Atlanta now. That’s where all our shit at, so I guess that’s where we need to be.”

“We could move our stuff here.”

“Ain’t no point. I like being up there with you. Away from all this stuff,” he looked out, taking in their surroundings. “I know too many people down here, and I don’t like that for you. I want you somewhere safe, where nobody knows me and knows you mine.”

Nova’s forehead dented in concern. He knew his Moo-Moo, and he knew she was about to go too far.

“Is something wrong? Is there somebody trying to hurt you?”

“No Moo.”

“Then why you say that?”

He shrugged. “You know how my mind is. I was just thinking about how much I love you, then it made me think about what I’d do if somebody ever tried to take you from me, and that made me think about that stupid shit. Ain’t nobody talking about nothing with me for real. I was just saying, because you never know. I did a lot of shit as a young nigga. People might be harboring hate, or just jealous because you look better than they baby mama.” He waved her off as if nothing he’d just said was of importance. “Plus, that’s what happened with me and Lo.”

“Logan?”

“Yeah, niggas trying to get at me, got at her instead and tried to rape her. You know the rest.”

“Auto, you can’t hold the blame for that. People are evil on their own. There was nothing you could do to stop them.”

“Yes, it was. I could have kept my love for her on the tuck, then niggas wouldn’t have known she was my weak spot. Any enemy I got will rush you if they can’t get me, and you already know how that’s going to turn out.”

Auto’s teeth gritted as the visuals of Nova screaming for him in the infirmary that day flashed into his mind. To drown out the painful sounds that was taking him to a place he didn’t want to be, Auto squeezed his eyes shut and held Nova’s hand to his nose. Her scent soothed him almost instantly. The soft smell resting on the tips of her fingers reminded him that they were no longer in that era of life, and she was there with him. Safely.

“We’re not doing any of that anymore. We’re happy now. Married and having kids together,” Nova’s voice pried his eyelids apart. “I love you, babe. Stop thinking about stuff that hurts you.”

He nodded slowly while looking around at the other patrons. “You better. Got me in this high ass restaurant spending all my money on you and that damn psycho ass baby.”

He watched the way her eyes closed and belly jumped as she laughed at him.

“Don’t even know her lil’ ass yet, and been cashing out like a sprung ass nigga,”

“What if it’s a boy?”

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