Page 62 of Feeling Blue

“It’s a feeling you can’t even explain.” Egypt’s hand rested on Auto’s shoulder when his head dropped into Autumn’s hair.

“She’s so fucking pretty and perfect with her lil’ fat ass. I already know she finna be bat shit crazy. Pretty girls always the craziest ones, then to have me and this psycho ass girl as her parents. Poor baby gon’ flip the daycare.”

Everyone’s happiness exuded them as they admired Autumn’s sweet exterior. Her warm brown skin held a subtle tan tint to it, while a small layer of black hair lay smoothly along her head, with the chubbiest cheeks they’d ever saw weighing down her pretty little face. The serene ambiance that encompassed her as she snuggled close to Auto’s chest with two pink fists balled beneath her chin gave the whole room such a peaceful feel.

“You happy, ain’t you, Auto?” Azayna’s head and cheek was tilted with a smile.

“You can’t tell by all the tears he’s been shedding?” Blue questioned her. “Nigga ain’t stopped crying since we got in here.”

“Swear,” Egypt dragged. “I didn’t know who was in labor. Him or Nova.”

Auto’s hand left Autumn long enough to shoot them all a bird. “Fuck all y’all. Call my granny… she’s got to see what we made.” He pecked Autumn’s head softly before looking around at all of his friends before stopping his gaze on Nova. “Thank you for everything, No. I love you for real.”

“I love you too. You deserve this.”

Auto didn’t know how true that was, but the more she said it, the more sense it began to make. Maybe he did deserve happiness.

How did I get so lucky?

“Sounds good. Thanks Hope. I have a few more days of vacation left, and then I’ll be back in the office. I’ll need to stop in Georgia on my way to visit him and get as much information as possible before flying out. I need to know what I’m dealing with.”

In a crème satin dress, paired with gold and floral print designer slides, the ‘Z’ and rose necklace hanging from her neck, and a wide chocolate colored headband that looked like it was braided, pushing her long hair back and over her shoulders. The sun kissed her chocolate skin, making her freckles appear to be lighter than they were as she paced back and forth in front of him and Pat.

Multiple gold bracelets slid down her wrist as she scratched her head. The colorful jewels in one of them caught the rays from the sun, casting a glow on the large earrings in her ears. Blue’s eyes were trained on her and hadn’t moved since she’d walked away to take her call. The way she handled business, speaking every word correctly and enunciating her point precise and clear for the caller to understand made Blue so proud that he couldn’t fight the feeling.

“You ain’t got to stare. She ain’t leaving,” Pat’s voice tore his gaze from Forever.

“I just,” Blue shook his head and slouched back in the chair once again. “Can’t even explain it.”

Pat blew smoke through his nostrils. “Try.”

“I’m just so proud of her. She’s so fucking big, and don’t even know it. I be watching the way she works and how hard she goes all the time, and it makes me want to be just like her.” He released an embarrassed chuckle. “Not on no weird shit, I just wanna make sure I measure up.”

“You do.”

“Come on, Pat. I’m a street nigga. Forever’s taste should revolve around lawyers, doctors, and any other rich nigga job.”

“Her love should revolve around a man that’s going to treat her right. She works hard, which means she needs a release. Be that. You talk like you some busta ass nigga… shid, you rich too. Hood rich, but money is money, son.”

“Nah, I know I’m not, but what I look like walking up in her job? Going around her lawyer friends and shit?”

“Like that person that makes her happy,” Pat’s eyes trailed out toward Forever.

She was still on the phone, but she’d turned to face them and was staring at Blue. As soon as he blew a kiss at her, she smiled and waved giddily. His hand drifted back at her before dropping back into his lap.

“You look like the person that makes her smile and feel like that,” Pat’s pointer finger emphasized his point. “Where all this coming from, anyway? You ain’t never been the insecure type, and you’ve had plenty of bad bitches.”

Blue sighed and thought back on the conversation he’d had with Zurena and just shook his head. Though he knew the root of all of her issues, the things still bothered him when he thought about it. Mainly when he was alone with Forever and got to witness her through his lenses.

“I think it’s because she finna go back home and I don’t like being without her.”

“What’s y’all plan? I can see now the long distance ain’t gon’ work.”

The weight that had been on Blue’s shoulders returned. He knew that too and had been trying to decide for a while. He truly wanted to be wherever she was, but he wouldn’t force her to move to Miami, nor would he fly to California to move in with her. He was too much of a man to do that. If he was living anywhere, it had to be something he’d gotten with his own money and not his girl’s.

“We haven’t really talked about it yet. We called ourselves visiting both places to see which one we liked better, but I hated California.” A deep rumble of laughter left his throat. “I ain’t tell her that because she’s all sensitive and shit, but I can’t go out there. She needs to come down here with me.”

“You the man. Tell her.”

---