Page 57 of Just Desserts

"Why are you whispering darling?" He said, laughter evident in his voice.

"It's early." I said as if that explained it.

"Too early for breakfast? If you open the door, you won't have to whisper". I dropped my cell on the counter and hopped off the stool. Rushing to my apartment door, I swung it open, my heart swelling at the sight of Myles standing there, his hair still damp from a shower, two coffees and a bag of what smelled like bagels from my favorite shop.

"You look nice." He said, leaning down to give me a kiss before depositing his goodies on the counter.

"How long have you been awake?" He asked as he put one of the coffee cups in front of me followed by a toasted bagel with scallion cream cheese. I shrugged, not wanting him to know that I'd been up all night.

His slate eyes studied me and I felt like he could read my mind and see everything I was trying to hide and repress. It was unnerving. I broke eye contact and dug into my bagel gratefulfor the reprieve.

"I know you said you didn't need me with you in the courtroom but I couldn't stand the idea of you going through this alone. I know you have Lydia, but I just thought I could give you a ride there, maybe wait and take you out after? I just want to be close in case you need me, is that alright with you?" Myles pleaded.

I know how hard it was for him to ask that, to admit his concern. More than anyone else in my life Myles has made a concerted effort to make sure my feelings and decisions took precedence over anyone else. I had asked him not to come to court with me and he was trying to respect that but it also went against all his manly protective instincts. If I was honest with myself, there was a part of me that wanted him there.

Knowing he would be outside waiting for me gave me comfort. So I put up a halfhearted argument, relenting quickly and allowing Myles to drive me to and from the courthouse. He solemnly swore to stay in the parking lot. I unbuckled my seatbelt and was immediately yanked into Myles' side. He kissed me hard, holding me tight against him. We pulled apart and he leaned his forehead against mine, stroking a hand down my hair and back.

"I'm here if you need anything. Anything at all. I'll be waiting at the bottom of those steps for you." He said, more to himself than to me at this point. I nodded my head, leaning into him for a final embrace, drawing strength from his scent and the feel of his arms around me. I slid out of the car to meet Lydia who was waiting at the steps of the court house. I gave her a hug, and turned around one last time.

My heart stopped for a moment as I locked eyes with Myles. His usually cheerful face peered out from his front window, he looked somber and concerned. I smiled at him and nodded my head, I had this. I would get through today, finally put my past in the rearview mirror and get one step closer to my future. A future with Myles.

Chapter 40

Jonathan

I stood in the courtroom, a sense of numb detachment overwhelming me. Since Alyssa told me she was pregnant, I felt like I was living in black and white. I couldn't take a proper breath, I couldn't catch up. My life was running away from me and I wasn't in control.

I stood at the table, waiting for Isla to arrive with her attorney. I had a vague hope that my parents would be here to support me, but my side of the courtroom was woefully empty of any familiar or welcoming faces.

I swear I sensed it when Isla entered the building. A tingle went down my spine and flashes of color started invading my vision. My head swiveled to face the back doors, waiting for just a glimpse of her.

I hadn't seen Isla in so long, she felt like a figment of my imagination at this point. She looked beautiful, her hair floating around her like a gossamer sheet, her outfit was simple and polished, the rich Navy of her suit popping against the various wood tones of the courtroom.

My eyes never left her and with every fiber of my being I wished that she would look at me, acknowledge me in any way. All of the reasons I excused my behavior, rationalized stepping out on Isla were lost to me at this moment. She was everything that Alyssa was not.

How could I willingly leave a woman like Isla for something so fleeting, so irrational, so irrevocable? How could my sins be so clear to me now, when there was nothing I could do to repent for them?

Isla took her seat at the opposing counsel table across from me, a brief glimpse of ice blue held me in place before Lydia took the seat between us blocking my view. Color and sounds dimmed again and I felt like I was getting swept away by a current.

The world moved on around me and there was nothing I could do to keep my head above water, to catch a breath or see the shore. The gavel sounded, jarring me out of my reverie only to find the judge and Lydia staring at me.

"Mr. Conner. Do you understand everything I've just said? I am granting the divorce and signing the latest submission for the settlement agreement. Once the sale of your house has gone through 50% of the proceeds must go directly to Ms. Isla Graham in addition to whatever funds are needed to cover her attorney fees. Case adjourned."

Graham? She had already gone back to her maiden name? How had she moved on so quickly, washed her hands of me without a backward glance? The next case and the defendants were already walking in, waiting for me to get out of their way.

That's what my presence had been reduced to, just someone in the way. Nothing but a hindrance, an impediment. I got up and headed towards the exit of the courtroom at a quick pace, my eyes scanning for Isla. I ran out of the building, standing at the top of the steps to the courthouse trying to get a glimpse of her. I needed to see Isla, hold her, hear her voice. Nothing made sense to me anymore except for Isla, I needed her.

Finally I caught sight of her, pale locks blowing in the breeze,her familiar frame hopping down the last few steps where she was suddenly surrounded by her family. My heart cracked as I watched them embrace her, the group looked almost celebratory like the end of our marriage was something to rejoice. I had to hold myself back from storming down there, I wanted to break the group up, stop the revelry. But I was frozen in my steps as the dark haired man I saw at Isla's bakery broke away from the group to pull Isla into his arms.

Unable to turn away, I watched as she curled into him with comfort and ease. Any remnants of hope were dashed in front of my eyes as I watched the two of them together. Isla had a look on her face I had never seen before, she certainly never looked at me like that. I felt invisible. Another man had his arms around my wife, surrounded by her smiling family. That was supposed to be me. That was my life this strange man was living. He was the interloper yet here I stood, alone on the periphery watching my wife move on without a backward glance.

Alyssa

After sharing the news, I hadn't heard a word from either Jonathan or my parents. For the moment I was okay with that, since I needed some time to get things sorted. Namely to get knocked up and to confirm that the divorce finally went through. I knew Jonathan had court today so I made sure to show up at the justice building. I stayed in my car, parked in one of the back spots hidden from sight.

I wanted to make sure they both showed up, see their faces when the decision became final. My stomach dropped when a large, familiar pickup truck pulled into the lot. Myles' tall form was visible from behind the wheel with Isla's sitting next to him. It felt like there were ants crawling across my skin, mybody flashing hot, my hands tightening on the wheel.

I watched with vivid horror as Myles pulled Isla to him, his grasp desperate, his adoration evident. How? How was this possible? I had gotten so far. I had finally pulled the rug out from under Isla. I had broken up her marriage, changed the entire course of her life. Yet here she was with the one true man of my dreams.

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