Page 67 of Paparazzi

“Shut up. I don’t even want to hear your pathetic excuses. I don’t want to see your fake sad puppy-dog face anymore. You’re dead to me!” he shouts while he types the code to open the elevator with one hand, and takes me by the arm and pushes me inside with the other.

I don’t dare say anything. Tears fall down my cheeks until my neck and the scarf I’m wearing are soaked. When I stumble outdoors, I’m so lost I don’t even know where to go. All I can do is pull out my cell phone and call Emily. “I screwed up. You have no idea what a mess I’ve made,”

I babble, sobbing and sliding down the wall to the ground, oblivious to the strange looks I’m getting from passersby.

People:

Shocking news from the Jailbirds. Sources report that Thomas Simons, the band’s drummer, spent his teenage years in prison for drug trafficking. The documents have been sealed because he was a minor at the time, but as you can see from the photos, the evidence is overwhelming. Is this the downfall of the world’s most famous band? Not only is their career at risk, but their record company could drag them to court and claim damages for millions of dollars, leaving them penniless. And how will their fans react? A lie that has lasted for ten long years is hard to swallow and forgive.

Gossip Now!

Thomas Simons is a former inmate! You read that right. The Jailbirds’ drummer spent his adolescence in prison for a serious offense: drug trafficking. The famous musician has deceived everyone for years, pretending to be a good guy when he actually has a dark past that fans will not appreciate. It is unclear whether their record company—or the band itself— knew about this, but we are confident that his career has come to an end. In all probability, he will be replaced shortly, and someone has already started naming names.

Rock Now:

The recent story that has shaken newsrooms across the country is one that no one expected. Thomas Simons of the Jailbirds spent his teenage years locked up in a juvenile prison for drug trafficking. No statement has yet been released by the record company or the band’s manager, but we are sure that more details will be released in the next few hours. If the information turns out to be true, we’ll have to expect repercussions on the drummer’s career and his bandmates—there are rumors the record company could drop them.

@jailfreakingbirds I’m speechless. No. You shouldn’t have done this to me, Thomas.

@jailbirds_groupie I don’t believe it. I was at the listening party for the single, and he didn’t seem like a prison scumbag.

@wannabe_rockstar Now we know who gets Michael the drugs.

We’re all in my apartment when the news hits the tabloids. Evan, Damian, Michael, Simon, and even Lilly, because this thing will turn her life upside down as well.

“Wow, we’re all here. I hope at least she got good money out of this so she can take care of her mother for a few years.” Michael’s voice is so sarcastic I don’t even want to object. “And to think I wanted to thank her for opening my eyes. She screwed me too, that bitch.”

“Don’t be a moron.”

It’s Lilly’s voice that scolds him, and I look over at her tense face. She’s the only one who didn’t believe Iris could do such a thing, and when the news first appeared in Ron’s paper, her face twisted into a grimace of pain. I wished I could hate Iris for it, because she hurt not only me but all my friends as well. I don’t care about my life, but I care about them, and seeing them so knocked down makes me sick.

Evan has been walking back and forth in the corner of the room, not far from us, on the phone since Iris left my apartment this morning, and I called him. His face is tense, focused. He smiles in front of us, he says everything will be okay, but this is a big thing even for him. It’s no longer about paying people who ask too many questions, covering scholarships for the children of those involved in our old lives, or tricks like that. This time it’s a matter of trying to stop the flood of bad news all over the United States, and worse, the whole world. It’s no longer just Manhattan, New York, or the States. There are articles in Chinese and Japanese posted with our worst photos.

“Don’t be a moron? She sold Thomas out after fucking him. She doesn’t deserve any respect from the world. I trusted her, I liked her, and this is the result.” Michael is mad, more than the others who took it like a punch in the stomach.

“You don’t even know for sure it was her,” Lilly says in an attempt to defend Iris. I have no idea why she cares so much about Iris. I suspect she caught a glimpse of a potential friend in her, a girl to confide in amid all the testosterone around her, and it pisses me off even more because Lilly is a good person and doesn’t deserve to be betrayed this way.

“She came here this morning and told me that her friend had researched me. What other proof do you need?” I ask irritated, earning a nasty look from Damian that I decide to ignore.

“Confessing that her friend did research and selling herself what he discovered to the papers are two completely different things. What reason would she have had to come here and warn you? Do you even know the name of this friend who helped her? Did you wonder what the hell of a role he had in this whole thing?” Lilly is livid, and it pains me to look at the suffering in her eyes.

“Lilly.” Damian’s whisper is sweet but firm as he wraps his arm around her shoulders and pulls her to his side. A simple gesture that hurts me. Only this morning, I did the exact same thing with a person I thought I could trust, and now I’m here rethinking her every gesture in an entirely negative way. I wonder why she kissed me with passion and sweetness, why she caressed me like she was exploring something new or precious, why she allowed me to enter her and sink into her most intimate parts, letting me know her like few people have.

Evan comes back to the conversation and sits on the couch. “We’re getting to the bottom of it to see who actually released the information and how much he got for it. That document she gave you comes from the court records, so whoever found that information had to ask for a favor from someone who had a legal responsibility not to reveal sensitive information about a minor. In addition to losing his job, he also risks a felony charge.”

I’m surprised to notice I sincerely hope that person is not Iris. After all that’s happened, after even more proof that women cannot be trusted, I find myself wishing that she’s not involved, proving once again that there is something profoundly wrong with me.

“What the hell is there to get to the bottom of? It was Iris, and that’s it,” Michael snaps, standing up and throwing his laptop on the couch he was sitting on.

“Michael. If no one had given you the chance to explain and give you a second chance, you would still be cleaning toilets at Joe’s bar,” Evan harshly scolds, turning everyone’s eyes on him. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but I’m not going to slaughter someone in court if I don’t have proof that she’s really involved. So, I ask you to be patient until I get to the bottom of it. In the meantime, we all have to move to the hotel. The paparazzi are starting to arrive in front of your house. Max, Dave, and a couple of other drivers are already in the garage with four cars ready. We’re going to Connecticut.”

Evan’s words cut the air like a reprimand and an order. At this point, I understand how much we need someone like him to manage our lives better, because they’ll no longer be the same after tonight.

*

The drive to Connecticut is a string of confusing images running past the window and as many equally confusing ideas flowing through my mind.

I relive every single moment I spent with Iris: every single conversation we had, every single moment of intimacy and shared breath. Not one moment did she seem insincere or even ambiguous, not even when I found out she’s a paparazzo. She took me to the clinic to meet her mother, refused any financial help I offered her, and I can’t help but wonder if it was all a grand plan designed to get more information about me. But I don’t understand why. Why invest so much energy in something that could easily earn her nothing? At the end of the day, dozens of bands have a boring and monotonous life. Ours could have been too. Maybe she enjoyed the sex? Was that what she got out of this? If so, she could have given in earlier and enjoyed the roller coaster. Instead, she pushed me away for a long time, almost like she was trying to protect me.

---