Page 76 of The Actor: Harrison

I grab the phone and, without another thought, dial Harrison’s number. It goes straight to voicemail. I’m so surprised that I don’t even say anything before hanging up. I try a second and a third time with the same result.

An ugly feeling settles in my stomach. Why can’t I get a hold of him? I take a few moments to consider my options and come to the conclusion that I don’t have many. I call the only other person who has his number.

“Hi Kevin, I’m trying to call Harrison but it goes straight to voicemail, do you know if he’s having some problem with his phone?” I ask as soon as he picks up, and I realize how childish my words are when I hear them out loud. Why should I call Kevin to ask for him? I’m having sex with him, I could just go to his house. I sound like a teenager who got dumped by his crush, asking his friends if they know where he is. God, I feel stupid.

“No, I got a call from him this morning, I assume his phone works.” I hear rustling in the background and I hope Kevin is doing something important and not giving much thought to what I’m asking.

“Listen, I watched the edited movie and it’s great. I’m in touch with the sound engineer and the guy coordinating the soundtrack,” I add, hoping to move the attention to something less stupid than my love life.

He chuckles. “I know. Nolan was furious when he called me.”

That asshole had the guts to go to him as soon as I called him out. “Speaking of Nolan. I don’t want him near the movie for any reason. I’ll put it on the server and if he asks you why he can’t have the key, tell him he pissed me off and he’s fired. His name will be on the credits, but he’s done with this movie,” I say firmly, trying not to give too much space to the anger rising in my gut.

Kevin chuckles again. “Finally, you grew some balls,” he says before hanging up.

What does that even mean?I stare at the phone in disbelief with more questions than before. The man who always belittles me is now proud of me and the one who always supported me sent me straight to his voicemail. Did I step into an alternate reality where my life turned upside down and I didn’t notice it?

This doesn’t work. The dialogue it’s too stiff, nobody talks like that. I rub a couple of fingers over my eyes and feel the burn making my view blurry. I should go to sleep, or at least use some eye drops. I look out the window and the sun is shining high in the sky. What time is it?

I put my eyes back on my computer and stare at the page. I’m almost finished, but the more I read what I wrote, the more I think it’s a bunch of bullshit. How does Sienna think I can do this? The dialogue sounds childish and the scenes are…I don’t even know how to describe them. Insignificant? I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but now I’m doubting every single scene of this screenplay.

I had a great idea for the movie. Something that came straight from my heart but now I’m doubting I even have a heart to follow. Maybe it was just a dream and I’m fool to follow it. Not everybody has the skill to actually achieve their dreams.

“Are you fucking serious?” Aaron’s voice startles me to the point that I almost drop the computer.

My heart hammers in my chest as I turn around and find Aaron and Leonard looking at me in disbelief. “Are you trying to kill me? You can’t sneak into my house like that. You scared the shit out of me!” I shout back, more startled than angry.

Aaron scoffs.

Leonard looks at me like he wants to kill me. “Sneaking up on you? We fucking rang the bell like maniacs before using our keys to get in!” he spits.

“Oh. Really?” Now I’m confused. “I didn’t hear it.”

They shake their heads, walking to the couch and sitting down. It’s weird to see them so worried. And I have no clue why. Did a bomb explode in the neighborhood and I didn’t notice it? My eyebrows knit together, trying to understand what’s happening.

“We thought you were dead. We’ve tried to contact you for the last three days, but your phone goes to voicemail. We thought you were filming or something, but you usually call back when you listen to your messages. So, we came here to check. You scared the shit out of us, too,” Aaron explains and I’m even more confused. Three days? How did I miss three days?

“I don’t know what to say. Was it really that long?”

They look at me like I’m crazy and, to be honest, I feel a bit nuts right now. It’s like I walked into my own mind and forgot to come out. I feel out of touch with reality and it’s unsettling. I feel completely lost and all I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep until it’s gone. Maybe the sleep deprivation is what’s making me feel thrown under a bus.

“Where’s your phone?” Leonard asks.

I have to think about it. I normally check my phone often when I’m not on set, but right now I can’t remember the last time I saw it. After a ten-minute search with Leonard whispering “unbelievable” at least ten times under his breath, and Aaron turning my living room upside down, I find it under the couch cushions.

“It’s dead,” I announce trying to turn it on without success.

“Since when?” Leonard asks.

“I don’t know.” I shrug.

“When was the last time you plugged it in?” Aaron pushes.

“I don’t know.” I sit down on the couch again.

“When was the last time you slept, or ate…or took a shower?” Leonard makes a disgusted face.

“I. Don’t. Know.” I repeat, exasperated.

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