Page 23 of The Mogul: Leonard

“I’m not acting like a jealous boyfriend,” he mumbles, his voice filled with defeat and vulnerability.

All the fight leaves his body, and a wave of guilt crashes over me. I hadn’t intended to wound him, but the unspoken tension had to be addressed. Perhaps I could have been gentler.

“You are. Maybe you don’t realize it, but you judge all my interactions with men, and I’m not comfortable with it. You are a friend, nothing more,” I explain, this time with a firmness that can’t be misunderstood.

“Okay. I’ll leave you alone,” he mutters, scurrying out of my room like a beaten dog.

I sigh and rub a hand over my face. That wasn’t how I meant to bring up the topic. As I take a shower, I replay the conversation in my head, thinking of at least ten better ways to handle it.

When I eventually leave my room, I can’t find Spike, but I do see Candy sitting at the kitchen table. She lowers her eyes shyly after she meets my gaze. I’m certain she overheard my argument with Spike earlier, and I feel bad for her. Candy has had a crush on Spike since the day I met them four years ago, but he is oblivious to her feelings.

“Do you want to come for a walk?” I ask, hoping to lighten her mood.

She nods and grabs her phone from the countertop.

We walk in silence for a while, letting the chatter of people around us keep us company. I don’t know how to start the conversation because the situation we’re in is not ideal. She likes Spike, but he’s interested in me, and I’m not attracted to him at all. How do you get out of a love triangle that isn’t even love?

After a while, she asks, “So, you punched Spike in the guts this morning, huh?”

I wince. “I suppose so. But I really don’t know how to handle this situation.”

She chuckles. “Better would have been a good start.”

I laugh. “That’s for sure. You should ask him out.”

She stares at me, eyes wide and mouth agape.

“Come on. You’re in love with him. What are you waiting for?”

I grab her elbow and drag her away from the trajectory of a skater heading for the skatepark. She is so lost in her thoughts she would walk straight into the ocean and not even notice right now.

“I don’t know how. He’s so into you he doesn’t even know I exist.” She giggles.

I shrug. I’m not an expert in relationships, but I’m not shy either.

“Just ask him out. ‘Spike, I like you, and I want to go on a date with you,’” I suggest.

It’s her turn to laugh. “Yeah, sure. Easy for you to say. You’re gorgeous and confident. I’m just…me.”

“You’re gorgeous, too, and don’t even try to deny it.”

She shrugs but says nothing.

“I know it seems like a big deal, but what’s the worst-case scenario? He says no. So what? At least you tried and you can get over him. Pining over him will get you nowhere—with him or anyone else who is less complicated than him.”

She sighs. “You’re right, but I suppose it’s easier this way. If I don’t ask him, I don’t have to face rejection.”

“What if he says yes? You’ve wasted a ton of time because of your fear,” I counter.

“Do you always have a comeback for everything?” She looks at me, a mischievous smile playing on her lips.

“You know, I’ve always been a practical person. I don’t shrink back from asking questions for fear of what I could find out. I’d rather know and face the consequences. Like when I didn’t know where my sister was, and if she was dead or alive. That uncertainty made me the person I am today. It taught me the value of taking risks and facing the unknown.”

She says nothing after that. She knows my history with the witness protection program and she gets my point.

“Have you seen these new apartments?” Candy asks when we reach the new building.

It’s fancy, with Venice Beach vibes but Beverly Hills amenities. Something I could never afford. I stare at the phone number on the leasing sign. I already committed it to memory, dreaming of having the money to move here, in a space I don’t have to share with anyone.

---