Page 73 of The Bad Girl and the Baby

Why the hell was he being so nice? She needed to toughen up.

She’d told herself she could do this, that she just had to get the words out. And she had. If Matt had left straight afterward, or been horrible, then she would have been fine. But he hadn’t, and she never cried, and yet now, she couldn’t stop.

She’d also accepted that it was over between her and Matt. Lulu was the glue that had held them together. With Lulu gone, there was nothing. Better to accept that now and maybe move on with her life. That had been her thought behind doing the fight last night. She’d gotten Sam to pull some strings and arrange it. But she’d known almost straight away, as soon as she’d stepped into the ring, that the excitement had gone out of the fight circuit for her.

That returning to that life was going backward, and she had to find a way to move forward.

She should push him away. Really, she should, but instead she pressed her body closer to his. Her mouth opened beneath his, and she kissed him back with everything she felt inside. When she ran out of oxygen, she pulled away, buried her head in the curve where his neck met his shoulder, breathing in the warm, masculine scent of him.

Just once more. Surely, she could have that. Then she’d let him go, because she was no good for him. Just as she’d been no good for Emma and no doubt would have messed things up with Lulu as well.

But tonight, he was hers. She’d tried to push him away. She’d planned to call him tomorrow, tell him that he should go ahead. Tell his parents that she supported them and wouldn’t stand in their way of adopting Lulu. Not that she legally could have stopped it if Matt was determined to go ahead.

But he’d surprised her and given her the option to say no. And that had messed her up totally.

She knew he loved Lulu, but also that taking in his niece had complicated his life. And while she’d expected reservations, she’d also expected him to accept. Yet he’d given her the option of joint custody, and for a brief moment in time, she’d thought about it. But just for a moment. It wasn’t really a viable option. His parents offered the whole deal; a proper family life. She’d seen pictures of their home, the big garden, the ready-made sister. How could she take that from Lulu? When she had so little to offer in return.

Matt stepped back, cupped her face in his palms, and wiped her cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

She sniffed. “Sorry. Tears over.”

He didn’t answer, just lowered his head and kissed her cheeks, butterfly kisses, gentle and soft, that melted her insides. Finally, he returned to her lips and took them in a drugging kiss. His hands slid around her, and he picked her up, holding her against his chest without breaking the kiss. He carried her out of the kitchen, through the living room, and into her bedroom, kicking the door closed behind them. He carried her with ease. She wasn’t small, and she could feel the strength in his arms, the muscles bunching.

He lowered her to the bed, came down over her, and she wrapped her legs around him, pulling him close, sliding her hands through his hair and holding him to her.

She pushed all thoughts from her mind and gave herself up to pure feelings. If this was the last time they’d be together, she wasn’t going to spoil it with negative thoughts.

His hands stroked down over her torso, tugged her tank top up and over her head, then he came up on one elbow and stared down at her. She had a bruise over her rib cage, and he trailed over it with his fingertips then cupped her breast. Lowering his head, he kissed her nipple, stroked it with his tongue, sending waves of pleasure rolling through her. She shifted restlessly beneath him, an ache at her core. Tightening her legs around him, she rubbed her sex against his hardening erection, desperate for some sort of release.

His mouth shifted to her other breast, his teeth biting down, and fire flared in her belly. Without leaving her breasts, his hand slid down over her stomach, flicking open the button on her jeans and pushing inside. His fingers curled into her, sinking through the folds of her sex. She was drenched, and so sensitive, a gasp escaped her throat. She shifted her hips, pushing against him. His fingers rubbed over her clit, and suddenly she was frantic. She needed him inside her. Now.

Her hands went to her waist, and she shoved her jeans down over her hips, kicked off her sandals. He was in the way, and she pushed him off and freed herself of the last of her clothes. Matt must have gotten the idea. He stripped with amazing speed, cursing as his pants got caught on his erection. Finally, he was as naked as she was. His cock was hard, vertical against his belly, and her sex ached with want. She reached behind her and grabbed a condom from the bedside table, threw it at him, watching as he tore it open with his teeth then rolled it down over his shaft. Then he was on her, his weight pressing her down into the mattress. She opened her legs, and he slid between her thighs, his cock finding where it needed to be. She was so wet, he entered her easily, filling her, stretching her. When he was lodged deep inside, he stared down into her face. “I’ll never regret this.”

She didn’t want him to talk. She didn’t want real life to intrude, so she bucked her hips against him. Pleasure flashed across his face. She tightened her inner muscles, squeezing, sending the thoughts from his mind, the words from his lips. His eyes closed briefly, but when they opened, they blazed with desire. He withdrew slowly, her sex tingling, then pushed back in, pressing against her clit, and pleasure flooded her. He ground against her slowly then pulled out. She bucked her hips again, trying to make him speed up; she needed this hard and fast. Instead, he held onto his control, moving slowly, each thrust driving her higher. Each grind against her sensitive clit stoking the fires inside her. The pleasure was building, coalescing in her belly, tightening her muscles, until it burst over her, shattering her, dragging her under. And still he moved inside her, so the pleasure burst again.

She opened her eyes to find him staring down at her, his jaw clenched. She dug her nails into the hard swell of his ass, pushed herself against him, and his control finally snapped. He thrust into her hard and fast, and she came again, her back arching as he spilled himself deep inside her and kept on pumping. Holding her gaze with his.

He collapsed onto her, rolling onto his side then onto his back, dragging her with him so she sprawled across his hard body, limp and satiated but already wanting more.

“I love you.”

The words were softly spoken, so quiet that she might have imagined them, except they were so far from anything she could have imagined, that they must be real.

He didn’t love her. He couldn’t love her. Love was never meant to be part of this.

She’d lost everyone she had ever loved.

This was not happening.

She made to roll off him, and he held her tight. She gritted her teeth and pushed harder. Finally, he released his hold, and she pulled free and got to her feet. Her legs shook. She didn’t look at him as she crossed to the wardrobe, pulled out a black T-shirt dress, and dragged it over her head. She couldn’t do this naked. When she turned back to him, he was still lying on his back, his long, lean body so beautiful, she had to drag her gaze away.

He didn’t love her.

This was just heightened emotion. The whole Lulu thing was messing with his head. As it had messed with hers.

Because she didn’t love him, either. She just liked him. Liked the way he made her feel. But that wasn’t love. She paced the room. Could she pretend she hadn’t heard? Pretend he’d never said the words?

“Are you going to deny you feel something for me?”

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