Page 16 of Tommy

“La, la, la,” I sang as my tongue trilled. “Once upon a time, there was a teddy,” I continued to sing, making lyrics up as I went. “And that teddy went on a journey, a journey to find a teddy friend.” As I thought on words, I hummed to break it up. “Mr. Teddy needed one friend to have a tea party with, and so he walked and he walked, he walked and he walked, all through the forest, and all through the woods.” At the same time, I colored in a picture of a teddy, carrying a briefcase. There was a flower poking out of the briefcase, and he wore a top hat.

I switched my song as I turned the page in the coloring book. Two teddy bears with their hands sewn together in the arms of a larger teddy bear. “The teddy bear had teddy bear friends and he wanted to share, but the teddy bears that the teddy bear had needed to stay together.” Laid on my chest with my legs swinging, I almost kicked the chair out and had the entire fort collapse on me.

They only way it would’ve been better would’ve been if I’d had a TV where I could watch cartoons, but it was a nice way to pass the time while I was recovering from burn out and needed to be satisfying all the good healing vibes of my body.

I’d fallen asleep while drawing, and only woke when the sound of a heavy knock came at the front door. For a split second, I thought I was home in my apartment and was about to get real mad at whoever it was had been banging. Then I caught him, face pressed against the window, looking in at me laid inside my fort.

I answered the door in my onesie and he smiled. “Heat should travel the bedroom,” he said. “You don’t need to camp out in front of the fire.”

Rubbing my eyes, only half of what he said went in. “I’m starting to realize how little there is to do here,” I said, yawning.

“Isn’t that why you were sent?” he asked. “Because you had to get work done.”

I scoffed and tutted. “Yes, and no. I’m here to recuperate my mojo.”

“Well, can I come in?” he asked. “You’ve got the fire on, you’re not—well, dressed, and it’s cold.”

Pushing the door open wider for him to enter, he dipped his head to avoid hitting his hat on the doorway. “If you give me five minutes, I’ll get dressed.”

“He’s toasty,” he said. “And take your time. I see you’ve been exploring the cabin. Didn’t think you’d get through all the blankets so soon.” He approached the sofa. “Or the sofa cushions.”

“I made a fort,” I told him, walking off into the bedroom where it was significantly colder. “And it’s really comfy, might even be comfier than the bed.”

“Probably,” he called back. “The mattress needs replacing if I remember right.”

Tiredness set in fast last night so my body didn’t process it, but sitting on the mattress now, it was quite thin. “So, when the owners come back, do you live in one of these cabins?” I asked, reluctantly climbing out of the onesie into the cold air.

“I used to,” he answered. “Not with the current owners, but previous owners had me living out here because they lived there full-time. They’ve had it extended since they took over, so I have my own section of the main house.”

Hardin could’ve told me anything and I would’ve believed it. The main house was big, and I’d barely scratched the surface of what I’d seen. The living room, kitchen and dining areas were the it, but there were hallways and grand arched doorways leading to closed rooms I hadn’t seen.

“If you can, wear a couple pair of pants,” he said. “In these months, I have a pair of thermals on beneath my jeans, they keep the warmth in, and they also give you an extra layer of cushion when you’re on the horse. First time it’ll hurt, just a warning.”

I didn’t own thermal bottoms, but I did have sweatpants. It was a squeeze to wear them under another pair of pants, but it was going to have to do. The last thing I needed was a horse to buck with me on it and have my balls be sucked back up inside, or worse, be bruised.

Stuffing my hand into my underwear, I cupped my balls. “Don’t worry, I won’t let you get hurt.” That was the goal, at least.

Hardin sighed, the longer I took getting ready. “I’ll have to teach you the ropes on setting the saddle up for the horses too,” he said. “If it’s not set up right, you’ll fall right off. So, just letting you know that we still have a little work to do, assuming we get to the stables before night.”

“And how long do we have until then?” I called out to him, putting a hoodie on over my t-shirt.

“Four hours.”

“So dramatic,” I laughed back to him.

In the living room with a slight waddle, I approached him. “Is this too much?”

“How many layers are you wearing?” he asked, raising a hand to his mouth, almost covering his smile.

“Um, enough, I think.” I knew I’d gone a little overboard when I put two pairs of pants on, but I also needed to protect myself from the elements and the horses. “You said more layers are better. Right?”

“They are, yes, but in this instance, I’m not sure,” he said. “Can you even walk?” He burst into laughter.

The waddle was strong as I walked, my thighs unable to touch. “Ok, maybe I should remove one layer,” I said as my movements were robotic as I lifted my arms. “Yeah, I’m gonna do that.”

Hardin continued to chuckle as I waddled back to the bedroom. I knew the problem was the second pair of pants, andmaybe even the second t-shirt I’d added. I was too used to the warmth, and knowing I was about to be hit by a last of icy air had my nipples solid in the worst way possible, like frozen peas able to scratch glass.

“I might have spare clothes you can have as well,” Hardin added as I was finished readjusting. “You’ve made me sympathetic.”

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