“No, because you deserve a bouquet of roses,” he said, pushing the door shut with his foot. “I wanted you to come over so I could apologize and talk about my thoughts, and your thoughts as well, because we might not think the same things.”
“Ok.” I sat on my bed and reached for Bloo, pulling him into my arms. “I’m listening.”
“I saw a counselor on campus, and she was great, she kinda opened my eyes to life and specifically, my life. I realized some things,” he said, sitting beside me and sighing. “I think I’m pansexual, which if someone had said that to me before I searched it up online, I’d have made a joke about kitchenware. Obviously, probably not appropriate.”
“That’s good to know,” I said, looking ahead still to where he’d been stood.
“And I’m demisexual, which again, before looking it up, I’d have ripped a joke,” he said, his hand tugging on mine to intertwin his fingers. “It means I don’t really feel attraction to people unless I form a connection with them, and, well, a deep connection.”
“Ok, I’m glad you got to figure yourself out,” I said, looking at him now, he was itching closer to me on the bed, but I was anchored in place. “So, that might bring me to what I want to talk about. Because I don’t think I can do this. I’m fine with the doing stuff for people to see, but I’m not ok with behind the door stuff, even if I might’ve said I was ok, I’m not anymore.”
For once, he was the one lost for words, or maybe twice. I wasn’t keeping count, I just knew he usually had more to say, and he said it usually with a confidence that even inspired me. “But—” His interlocked fingers twitched around mine in his hand. “But that’s not what I was saying. I—”
“What are you saying then?”
“I’m saying I really do want to date you.”
I didn’t know if that’s what I expected him to say. Sure, in some of my dreams, those words were uttered in my ear, often in a whisper before he went in for a nibble and I could feel his slight stubbly chin tickle my neck, but this wasn’t a dream, and he was sat right beside me, holding a bouquet of red roses, the most romantic of all the roses.
“Oh.”
“Oh?”
A giggle came out, like a nervous tick. “That’s not what I expected you to say,” I said. “I thought we were going to cut it there and maybe that’s why you wanted me to come over, so we could call it off in front of people. I really, really don’t know. My brain is kinda—”
Luke’s warm touch against my chin pulled me to a pause. “I was trying to tell you that I like you, Wren. It’s a new feeling, but one I want to explore, for real.”
I shook my head. “But I’m not sure you can give me what I’m looking for.”
He nodded. “Then tell me, what are you looking for?”
Gulping hard, I didn’t know how to approach it. It wasn’t exactly something that people knew about, especially people who weren’t even sure of their sexuality.
“I’m a little,” I whispered.
“A little?”
“It’s a type of play.”
He nodded and hummed. “Ok, well, I can play. I’m down to play whatever, I just know I want to explore this with you.”
“But it’s not something that you can just play, you have to want to do it as well.” I knew from experience of the forums on the adult websites that Daddies were often much older men who had grown into the kink.
“So, what do you want from me?”
Glancing at him from a dipped head, I stared into his big eyes. “I’m looking for someone who can take on a caretaking and dominant role.”
“A Dom.” He smirked. Clearly, he’d heard of that before. “I can look into it for you.”
“Specifically, me as your submissive, but as a little, as a boy, and you’d be—” my throat clenched a little harder now, unable to get the final word out. My face growing hot and even if I couldn’t see it, I knew I was beet red.
Luke bit into his smile. “I think I know what you mean. You want a Daddy.”
Butterflies. I nearly yanked Bloo’s stitching out. “A-huh.”
“I know a little about that,” he said. “I’ve googled a lot of porn in this sexual exploration phase.”
He wasn’t scowling and his upper lip was turning in disgust. He was willing to give this a shot. And now, I couldn’t move from sitting since those butterflies had moved south into my dick.