Page 71 of Sweat

Rowan

It’s just you gay boy

Me

How did I know you were going to say that

My afternoon class is a three-hour lecture on extreme weather. When I told Rowan I still need a science class to fulfill my general education requirements, he suggested meteorology with a specific professor. Word on the street is the dude is aneasy grader with a cool personality, and he shows a lot of crazy videos of tornadoes.

Just my luck, I walk into the classroom and see Lese sitting at a middle row desk. Hoping she doesn’t see me, I beeline for the closest vacant desk, but it’s only two slots away from her.

Great.

She’s been messaging me enough I considered blocking her, but I still feel bad about what I said to her at that party during my moment of weakness. I just wish she’d get the hint I’m not interested in fixing what ought to stay broken.

Because my neck is a traitor, it turns my head to check if Lese notices me. Lo and behold, she’s staring right at me. She lifts a hand and sends me the meekest wave I’ve seen out of her.

I wave back, because I’ve decided holding resentment toward someone I don’t even miss is dumb. If anything, I should thank Lese for inadvertently thrusting me into Rowan’s orbit. Or is he in my orbit? Somehow, the longer I play by Rowan’s rules, the more powerful I feel. I never felt half this powerful when I was with Lese.

What makes me feel itty bitty is when I’m thinking about being the reason Rowan doesn’t have the best season of his life.

After class, I fast-walk back toward the Student Union, but when Lese is bound and determined, she puts those petite legs to work.

“Tommy!” she calls after me.

I don’t have enough care left to try ignoring her, so I slow down enough to let her catch up. “What?”

“I’m sorry,” she quickly says, like her very presence is a burden to me, which it kind of is. “I just wanted to know how you’re doing. How’s Erica?”

“Doyou wanna know how I’m doing, or how Erica’s doing?”

“Both.”

“I’m fine.” I leave it at that, because Lese doesn’t need to hear about Erica’s prognosis.

“Yeah?” she asks, like I’m lying to her. “It wasn’t how it looked at that party. I don’t know why that Rowan prick said—”

“Lese.” I stop in my tracks and turn to face her. “It doesn’t matter. I’m seeing someone else.”

She stops with me, blinking big, wistful eyes up at me. “You are?”

“Yeah.”

“Who? That chick from the party?”

Ah, so Lese saw me acting out too. I was too busy chasing after Rowan to notice. For a second, I think to lie and say I’m dating Eve. Easier than saying I’m in an unofficial and undefined relationship with the guy she cheated on me with last spring, but I’m so disinterested in Eve that even talking about her would give her too much value in my life.

“Someone else.”

“Oh.” Even if I was in outer space, I could see the heartbreak on Lese’s face. She looks away and asks, “What does your mom think of her?”

“They haven’t met.”

“Is it serious?”

“It is what it is, Lese. It’s none of your business. All you need to know is I’m focused on someone else now. We had a good run, but it’s over now, so go do whatever you want.”

I’m about to walk away when Lese whines, “But I miss you. Can’t we…be friends, or something? We were friends, you know, before we started dating.”

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