Page 88 of Doubts & Fears

Chapter 28

Marcel

Nature of The Beast

“You mentioned that your everyday life has altered since becoming involved with my friends. I want you to explain to me from beginning to end how that process has evolved for you.”

“Well, at first, it felt very intrusive and annoying. Alek was the worst with showing up at my job or dance class. He likes to tell me what to do. Sometimes I feel like I’m being micromanaged. But it’s conflicting because I like it.”

Of course she liked it. Even without having to see her, I knew she had submissive tendencies. The guys had filled me in on several of their conversations with her. She was struggling internally to trust enough to let go.

“That’s excellent, Ms. Taylor. Please go on. Tell me what you like about it,” I encouraged.

“I love knowing what’s expected of me. I also like that it feels like someone cares, and that I matter. It makes me feel secure. I also like not having to make all the decisions. Those can be overwhelming sometimes.”

Her voice barely rose above a whisper as she spoke the last sentence.

“All of that makes perfect sense, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it. It makes me happy to hear you’re able to articulate into words how you feel.”

“Really? It’s okay for me to feel like that?” she asked, her words almost tripping over each other in confusion. The internal struggle was real.

“Absolutely. Adulting is hard. It can be more difficult if you feel alone.” I listened as she sighed heavily. “I wonder, though, about one of your statements. You seem to have cared deeply for Owen, so I’m going to assume that he felt the same way. Does your comment stem from the incident at New Haven?”

“Can we talk about something else?”

Panic laced her voice, and I made several notes and moved on. “Of course. Let’s look at the flip side of the coin. In what areas do younottrust, Alek, Nik, and Ivan?”

“Hmm, that’s a harder one to answer.”

“Tell me the first thing that comes to your mind when I ask you the question. Don’t think about it, say the first word. Let me ask it again, in what areas do you not trust them?”

“My heart.”

Two little words, whispered in the air. They were shared like a timid mouse tiptoeing into a room filled with roaring lions. It was going to be imperative that I have a hard conversation with the guys. She was falling for them. And I had a sinking feeling this had all the potential of ending badly.

“Very good, and that’s completely understandable,” I said quickly, reassuring her. “Let’s finalize this question and move on. You mentioned losing things that held significance for you. I’d love to know more about those things.”

A loud sob escaped the girl on the other end of the phone, completely taking me by surprise. “Not…not…ready to talk about it. It hurts to think about it. Please don’t make me.”

Another response practically begging me to not make her do something. Pain outweighed the fear in her voice. The fear, though, it nagged at me. I wanted to focus on it, delve into it with her, but instead, I jotted down notes as fast as I could.

“It’s fine. But when you’re ready, I’m here for you, okay?”

“Okay,” she sobbed.

I let her get her emotions under control and was about to end the session since we’d been speaking for close to thirty-five minutes. I liked to keep the first one shorter, but she surprised me once more.

“Can I ask you a question? Do you know who the men in the pictures are? The ones Nik showed me?”

I took a gamble and was honest. At some point, she was going to find out. It was inevitable. The Kings wanted to hold off for a while longer. They wanted to establish a clear connection between her real grandfather and Owen before sharing.

I agreed that establishing an idea of where she was mentally was essential for us to consider before unloading the information, but shewasasking. This was one of those areas I’d warned them about.

“Yes, I know who they are. Do you want to know?”

“No.” The word sliced through the air with unwavering conviction.

“Why not?” I leaned forward in my chair. My heartbeat quickened as I awaited her answer. Seconds stretched.