Page 37 of The Moments You Miss
Inever pictured my life would be this.
I never imagined that I would be this fucking lucky. You would think being told that the man you are dating was one of the reasons your parents were dead wouldn’t be a reason to leave someone. Somehow it isn’t an issue.
Besides, it wasn’t him— it was his father; and I remember better than anyone what it’s like to live in the shadow of people who only took advantage of you. Their death had taken away so much from me. In its stead, however, it’s now given me a whole new outlook on life and I honestly could not be happier than where I’m at.
I look at Cameron sleeping next to me in his bed, the warmth emanating off his body covers me and it’s a feeling that I never want to stop. What we did last night was a level of trust and joining thatdoesn’t just happen to anyone, it was a breaking point for us and there’s no going back now. I don’t truly know if it could ever be replicated.
Instinctively, I inch closer to his chiseled chest, my body melting into his as if we were made to be one. He is home. My home. His chest rises and falls in even breaths and I stare at it, his perfectly defined chest is littered with scars from a past no one was there to protect him from, and the cuts from what we did last night. Camerons arms tighten around me like a vice, pulling me closer than should be possible. A soft chuckle shakes his chest as he gently kisses the crown of my head.
“Morning, Cherry.” Cameron’s voice is low, silken like velvet. I didn’t think it was possible, but this man’s morning voice is by far the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced. Gently, I try to pull away from his bear-like grasp to no avail as he gives me a squeeze keeping me close to his body. “Let’s just stay here for a little while. Just us.”
I nod as he loosens his grip on me, still not letting me go. There’s this little part of me that is screaming at me that somehow, I don’t deserve this. “Yea, just us— only us.”Everything that’s happened doesn’t even feel real at this moment nor do I really care that it’s happened. It all comes rushing over me, I know for certain that no matter what happens, I am in love with Cameron Curtis, I don’t care what he’s done, then or now, I know the real man behind the curtain. He’s not perfect or a carbon copy of every other man on this earth, but he doesn’t have to be.
“Cam? Can I ask you something?” My voice quivers slightly, but I don’t let it show on my face. His deep green eyes narrow in on me and he gently brushes a stray hair off my face.
“Anything, Cherry, I will answer anything you need to know.” His hand subconsciously traces along the silky material of my nightgown.
A shaky exhale as I close my eyes, open them and look at the man in front of me. “Teach me?” Cameron’s hand stills, his breath catching.
“Teach you what?” Hesitation prickles his response.
“Teach me how to never be defenseless again? Teach me how to make sure people like Simon never get that power over me?” The things that I felt when Simon had taken me, the way that I was helpless to his advances. I didn’t stand a chance, and this entire time, he was the one who had been tormenting my psyche, breaking it apart bit by bit.
I won’t let that happen to me again.
“I want to help you. You know, do what you do. I want to make this world a better place so that monsters like Simon don’t ever get the chance to do that to someone else.”
Cameron is quiet for a moment, I could see the gears turning in his head. I want control in my life, something that up until last night I didn’t think was anything I would ever achieve. Being here, with Cameron, I’m in control again. Well, at least I’m beginning to be.
Cameron’s face looks torn, and I know what I’m asking of him isn’t something…normal. I’m not asking him to teach me how to drive stick or how to properly swing a golf club— I’m asking him to teach me how to kill with purpose and control. It’s not something that anyone should ever ask for, yet here I am.
My heart begins to race, the silence that ensued is deafening, my nerves reaching a level that was almost painful. Gently pulling away, I look at him. “Cam?”
“Leyla, I need you to know what you’re asking of me,” Cameron’s voice is one level and has an eerie calm to it that has the hairs on my arm standing on edge. A chill runs through my body, but I nod.
“I know what I’m asking you, Cameron.” My voice, confident as it may be, doesn’t give room for any further discussion. I need to be stronger. I need to not be afraid.
There’s another beat of silence before he answers. “Okay. I’ll teach you everything I know.” A smile grows on my face, and he mirrors it in return. His dimple makes an appearance as he raises a hand, gently cupping my cheek. “You don’t have much to learn on how to be strong. You’re already the strongest person I’ve ever met.” The conviction and truth in his words settle over me like a blanket on a cold winter’s day. It’s then when it hits me and the words tumble out before I could even try to stop them.
“I love you.”
Cameron stills and he smiles, the dimple that made an appearance creases even deeper in, his eyes crinkle at the corners.
“Lucky for you, Cherry, I love you too.”
That right there is how I know, this man is to be the death of me, and I’d be ready with open arms. I am unequivocally and totally in love, and he loved me right back; something that I had only ever dreamt of but now was finally mine.
Cameron gently kisses the top of my head, and I know that my life is forever changed. Nothing will be the same ever again.Cameron must pick up on the change in my mood, his arms wrapping around me and the warmth that envelops me, centers me back into the moment.
His voice is quiet, his emerald eyes forcing me to keep focus as he speaks, “You okay, Cherry?”
A whirlwind of emotions settles in my chest and I don’t even know where to begin. The weight of everything that’s happened this week comes rushing through me and I let out a huge exhale.
“I’m okay… I just never thought that I’d both gain and lose everything all over again. I never thought I’d get all the answers to what happened.” I clear my throat knowing that no matter what comes out of my mouth, Cameron will have an answer for me.
“Can I ask you something now?” Cameron’s voice betrays the calm demeanor present on his face. I nod with a soft smile and my back straightens.
“Anything, baby. You’ve been honest with me, I promise you anything you want to know, I’ll give you the honesty you’ve given me.”
