Page 41 of Burn

I stare at her. At her uncoordinated, poorly sized attire; at the way she wraps her arms around her midsection, eyes cast to the floor. I watch the way she nervously chews on her bottom lip. I want to chew that bottom lip. Fire ignites low in my body, and I know exactly where she’s going, and it’s not a goddamn hotel. I want her close by. I want to try and start over with this girl who has me under her fucking spell. Plus, there are things at home I need to show her.

“I obviously don’t expect you —” she starts, but I cut her off.

My voice comes out in a gravelly, low tone when I say, “You’re coming with me, Lex.”

Ten minutes later, Lex is signing paperwork at the nurses’ station with the girl from earlier. While Lex focuses on the forms, the nurse stares up at me through her thick lashes, a playful smirk on her face. When she bites her lip, I step closer to Lex and wrap my arm around her waist. She goes rigid for a second before setting the pen down, spinning to face me, and saying, “Okay, we can go.”

Before she can move, I reach out, tilting her chin up, and lean down to kiss her softly. She melts into me, completely oblivious that this is as much for the nurse as it is for us. The nurse clears her throat, her tone still bright, and says, “You two take care!” Lex is breathless when we part. She holds my stare and murmurs, “Thanks.” Taking her hand, I lead her to the elevator. As we wait, she leans into me, her head resting on my shoulder. Everything about the action feels so comfortable, like it’s something we’ve always done, but my heart somersaults. It’s not comfortable. It’s not regular. It’s the first time I’ve held her hand in mine, and I never want to let her go.

Who the fuck are you?

Lex

When we reach the truck, he moves ahead, opens the door, and extends his hand to help me inside. I’m fucking awestruck by the chivalrous display, and my foot catches on a crack in the pavement, sending me stumbling toward the vehicle. I scramble, reaching for something to break my fall. Warm, strong hands wrap around my arms as I crash into Adrian’s chest. I breathe in sharply, and the smell of smoke that follows him consumes me. The whole event leaves me coughing so hardthat my legs feel like rubber, and the only thing that saves me from falling to the ground is him. Heat crawls up my neck and cheeks, but before I can collect myself and apologize for being such a klutz, he scoops me into his arms and tucks me into the passenger seat.

Who the fuck is this man?

He silently pulls the seat belt across my chest and clicks it into place, then closes the door and rounds the truck. The look on his face stuns me. He’s… he’s smiling. Not the cruel sneers I’ve seen before, but the most boyish smirk that stirs hordes of butterflies in my tummy.

I’m in so much trouble.

By the time he reaches the door and climbs in, the smile is gone. He looks calm and relaxed. The engine roars to life, and we drive through the city in silence, my eyes glued to him. His left hand holds the steering wheel, while his right rests on the center console. I think about reaching out to take his hand again, but nerves get the best of me, so I fold them together in my lap. I notice his eyes shift, darting toward me and then back to the road. His lips quirk up at the corner, and his voice sounds like butter when he teases, “Take a photo, it’ll last longer.”

Oh, God.

I shift my eyes ahead, an inferno in my cheeks once again, and he chuckles softly. After months of biting tones and cruel laughter, this sound turns my heart to molten lava. I’m desperate to fire back with something equally as playful when it comes into view: my condo building. My blood runs cold. The bricks on the eighth through tenth floors are scorched black. Some of the balconies are charred. Caution tape whips in the wind, flitting in a chaotic dance. My mouth falls open, and I lean forward in my seat to get a better look, instantly wishing we’d taken a different route.

His voice is steely and emotionless when he comments, “There are firewalls that surround the units. That usually stops the fire from spreading,” I turn to face him, needing to look away from the wreckage of my home. “Your building has a fire suppressant system —sprinklers — but for some reason, they didn’t kick on,” he glances at me briefly, “That, paired with the fact that the fire started in the hallway, is what led to the fire spreading the way it did. It was a perfect storm.”

My heart thunders in my chest, and I roll the window down, letting the afternoon breeze wash over my skin. I count my breaths.

Inhale. One. Two. Three. Four. Five.

Exhale. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven.

I sputter and choke as my lungs strain and burn.

“I would assume the Fire Investigators will be all over this. The smoke and water damage is unavoidable, but it shouldn’t have spread the way it did.” His voice sounds far away.

“Stop…” I grit out between coughs, “Please, Adrian, stop. I can’t…”

I lean forward to drop my head between my knees, and when his warm hand gently lands on my back, rubbing circles, I focus on the feel of it — the feel of his heat, the feel of the motion, the way his fingers trace up and down. My body shakes as I relive pieces of that night: the confusion and fear.

“You’re safe, Lex,” he sounds unsure — not unsure that I’m safe, but unsure that this is the right thing to say.

I realize we’ve stopped moving. The truck idles and I can feel his full attention on me. I suddenly am very embarrassed by my reaction. What must he think? That I’m irrational? Hysterical? Goddamn it. I turn toward him without sitting up, but the driver’s seat is empty. I sit up and jump when he steps up to my door, pulling it open, and placing his hands on eitherside of my face. He leans in close; eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“Don’t do that,” he commands.

I stammer in response, my voice is cracked and broken, “What?”

“Don’t go back to that night. You made it out. You’re okay.”

These sound like words he’s said before, and I find myself wondering if this is the mantra he says to himself when the oily black smoke surrounds him in his dreams.

I’m somewhat numb when I nod. For a moment, I think he’ll kiss me, but he releases my face and holds his hand out for me. I look around. We’re less than a block from my condo, parked outside another building of apartments, and a hotel.

He changed his mind.

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