Page 29 of Monsters of Midnight

I rested my head back on the slab, closing my eyes and feeling the tingling steam sensation of my charred skin. I only hoped he sent the healer quickly.

Chapter 16

RYDER

I had screwed up.

I had lost the woman of my dreams, and in so doing, had lost the entire purpose of my being. Even though it seemed like I lived my life to keep the monsters off of the planet, that wasn’t it. I had known for centuries I was missing something.

I had watched humans have these interactions that were surreal. My mother had loved my father with such intensity…she couldn’t live without him. And while my father was truly a monster, and something not compatible with humanity, he had been compatible with her or at least she had been compatible to him. I had always wanted that loving connection with another creature.

When I met Caroline, I had known she was the one. She would love me constantly and consistently. It was only after I learned the fragility of the human heart that I realized love was not a given. Falling in love was not permanent. I had never paid much attention to all the miserable humans on earth who had loved and lost.

I had only focused on true love.

There was this capacity for true love that I had wanted it. I had won it with Caroline, and for a moment we had been happy, but I had no idea that for a human a day could seem like forever. and the times I was gone for weeks had been a lifetime for her while for me, they were only a momentary blip in a very, very long live.

Now my entire life was bearing down on me, weighing on my soul.

I woke in the middle of the night, the moon pouring into my room. It was waxing, becoming a full moon. I stared up at it forlornly, feeling my guts, stir.

The place was dead quiet. There wasn’t a sound anywhere.

I couldn’t sleep. It felt like days since I had really paid attention to anything around me, since I had taken a shower, since I had done anything that was the right thing.

My thoughts turned to Laney, but I shook my head. It was the wrong approach, leaning on somebody who had challenges of their own. Laney was a friend of mine, and anything else was just inappropriate and wrong. I might be a monster, but I wasn’t that much of one.

Caroline was the only one for me. I needed to apologize to Laney and let her know I wouldn’t be inappropriate with her again.

I glanced out at the moon. It was going to be full soon, and Caroline would move on from Undirheim to whatever afterworld they deemed worthy of her.

My heart clenched.

I needed to move.

I made my way down the dark and hallway and I was about to head up the stairs when I noticed the door to Laney’s room was open. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled. Something had changed. I pushed open the door and looked inside. There wasn’t anything wrong in the room. There wasn’t a thing out of place.

Laney was gone.

A sigh escaped me. I wasn’t sure if it was in relief or in sadness or a bit of both. Most likely it was the latter. Knowing Laney could take care of herself, I suddenly felt relieved to not have her in my proximity. We were growing closer than I wanted to. It was never a good idea. Without her around I felt very clear, direct energy leading toward Ratchet. Ratchet had a problem with the flowers and needed to be cured of the petals’ poison.

That I could do.

I rushed up the stairs and found Ratchet sitting by the fire, staring at it, his skin a white, clammy glow.

“Are you okay?” I asked, even though the answer was obvious.

“Not really,” he said.

“Is it bad?” I watched his fist as it clenched and unclenched against the armrest of the leather sofa.

It had to be bad if a demon was clenching his fists in pain. Demons, from what I understood, liked pain.

“It’s a pity the firefly left,” Christine’s words were soft in the glowing light as she came up the stairs from the bedrooms below. “The firefly could have a calming effect on anxiety, regardless of how it was produced.”

“Maybe there’s some kind of a potion you could make him?” I asked, going to the sink and getting a wet washcloth, creating a cold compress for my friend.

“Oh yeah, I got you,” Katrina said, going to the fridge and pulling out a chilled glass of pale pink liquid.

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