Page 40 of Masquerade

“You left him.” Anna squeezed her hand more tightly.

“It wasn’t your fault. You were dealing with Helen’s death.”

“All the more reason I should have recognised a vicious bastard.” Anna exhaled audibly. “We’ve exorcised Andrew. And I want to go back to where we’re forgetting him.”

“Book, hero—check.” Kate silently repeated the manta—in two-three, out two-three. “Something Liam said tonight gave me an idea. Well, it was more the way he said it. Some cadence in his voice, and I knew he’d talked to Niall.”

“Suddenly Liam’s the model for a hero?” Anna leaned out to the side and turned her head to stare at her sister.

“Not him. The reminder that a breakup affects every aspect of our lives. Our hearts are out of whack with our heads, and our bodies survive as best they can.” Kate freed her hand.

“What’s that got to do with a business dinner where you were impersonating me and plotting to send Ms. Billboard all over the state?”

“It’s not impersonating when everyone knows which twin it is.” Kate hip-bumped her sister. “Anyway, I asked a few questions after dinner.”

“You ask strangers on the bus questions.” Anna smiled affectionately. “You concoct stories about axe murderers centred around mild-mannered men in cafes eating muffins with their soy lattes.”

“Earth to Anna.” She waved a hand in front of her twin’s eyes. “Given they’re lawyers and my hero’s a lawyer, I was exploring the kinds of lies that cause bust-ups between colleagues and strangers.”

“They don’t necessarily break your heart.” Anna sounded sceptical.

“I was getting background ideas.” Kate still buzzed from her flash of intuition. “Liam asked about betrayal by a lover.”

Anna whistled. “You think he was referring to himself?”

“Has Niall ever mentioned anything?”

“You want me to pump him?” Anna studied Kate’s face. “You like Liam.”

“I liked his answers.” Kate would ask more questions on their road trip and see what he was prepared to share. Another legacy from her breakup with Andrew was not pressing others to reveal their secrets. “Don’t pump Niall.”

“You like Liam,” Anna insisted.

“He talked about me choosing books and isolation.” She’d started questioning herself about her habits lately. Did she create an atmosphere to push people away, to make them think she liked always being alone? “Do I push people away?”

“Not exactly,” Anna hesitated. “You keep a polite distance from people with reason. Grandpa was way out of line with that stupid story when we were kids about marriage being a transaction. That you needed to be pragmatic and practical when choosing a partner for life.” Anna shook her shoulders, her shimmy of rejection. “He even gave me the heebie-jeebies. For years, Mum and Dad spent most of their waking hours resolving their ‘creative differences’ and none on trying to understand us. Your writing became a secret, just like my partying. If they didn’t want to know about something, you didn’t tell them.”

“Because I didn’t want to listen to their lectures.” Her parents had exhausted her will to challenge them. Kate had reached that painful conclusion after endless slap downs. “I was unreasonable to expect them to change.”

“You made decisions to protect their prejudice. You chose to come to Sydney for university and provided an escape for both of us.” Anna blew out a long breath. “You—we—let them off the hook.”

“Turns out Andrew shared the same prejudices.” Kate waved a hand in the air.

“But you were half in love with him.” Anna corrected her. “Andrew did more than beg to differ loudly on the topic. He pretended to support your dreams, then took apart your self-esteem piece by piece. He wanted to control every minute of your life. Given Mum and Dad avoid social media, they were oblivious.”

“I shut it down.” Although she’d paid a high price, resigning from the library where she’d worked, relying on more private research and living off her savings and Anna’s generosity.

“You’re talking to me, Maybelline. I can’t forgive Andrew for making you distrust yourself.”

“I’m still writing.” Kate folded her arms, recognising the defensive gesture even as she made it.

“You’d always have used a pseudonym for Mum and Dad. The disguise is pure Andrew. And no, you don’t push people away, but you don’t let them get close either. So, I’d say books and isolation is a fair summary of your life at the moment.” Anna started bundling the clothes on her bed into large plastic bags. “Don’t get me started on your prejudice about suits.”

“He kissed me,” Kate whispered. The word kiss didn’t begin to describe the way her body had melted against him, the liquid heat rushing through her, the effervescence flooding her system making her want to laugh and clap her hands.

“Did you kiss him back?”

“Yes.” Not for the first time. Each time she discovered something new about him. Tonight she’d traced his ears. Ears were vulnerable. He’d been more vulnerable sharing his fantasies in the library. So had she, and for a person who guarded her privacy, she’d handed him the perfect weapon. She didn’t believe he’d use it, and in turn, neither could she.

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