Page 30 of Friends Rucked Up

“Are we cool?” I ask.

“As a cucumber.” She’s saying the right thing, but I have a feeling she’s not being truthful.

“Be real with me.” I lean forward to take her hand, and she pulls away.

“You’re just so confusing and you’re never honest with me. Is it because you’re not a risk taker? Is that why you’ve put me in the friendzone, or is there more to it?” Her words come out between her clenched teeth in a whisper shout.

“Maybe we do need to have a serious conversation, but we don’t have enough time right now.”

She is making me crazy and she’s right. I don’t want to risk what I have when it’s so good, even though I have feelings for her.

“And then you’ll avoid it.” She rolls her eyes.

Even though I don’t want her to be right, maybe she is. I’m not sure how to handle my feelings or this situation. I’m saved from answering because Harlan joins us. He tells us stories of his travels, but honestly, I’m not really listening. I keep catching Saylor’s eyeline, but her features stay hard, so I can’t read her.

When we leave, Harlan hugs her goodbye, and I can’t help allowing myself the same pleasure. I linger as long as I dare before we separate.

“Is there a bad vibe between you and my sister?” Harlan asks on our walk back toward my flat.

“No. We’ve never been better.” I’ve never been a good liar, and he sees straight through me.

He frowns before giving me a puzzled look. “That’s not how it seemed when I came out of the bathroom.”

I hold my heads up. “Whatever you think you heard can’t have been right. Saylor and I are all good.” I’m rambling, and it isn’t helping me be convincing.

“If you say so.” He still looks puzzled but hopefully he’ll drop it.

“I do,” I say firmly.

I’m thankful he lets the subject go for now, although I’ve no idea what he thought he overheard. If he’d thought we were romantically involved, this conversation would’ve gone totally different. Maybe he thinks we’re had a falling out over something not involving kissing. One thing I do know is that Saylor is the most important person in this scenario, and I’m going to do everything I can to make everything right between us.

Chapter Thirteen

Saylor

Getting up at the ass crack of dawn on my day off is my idea of hell, but knowing my brother won’t be with Alfie gives me the perfect opportunity to talk to him alone. Rooting through my drawers, I find some old leggings and a cropped top. It’s not exactly running gear, but it’ll do.

Once I have my trainers on, I open the Friend Finder app and pinpoint Alfie. We have the locator for emergency situations, but I’m sure he won’t mind me using it this one time to find him so we can talk. He’s always trying to get me to go running with him, so I’m finally giving in. I just have an ulterior motive.

Heading outside, I find him almost opposite my block of flats and make my way over to him. It’s like he senses me as he slows his pace so I can catch him up.

“Hey. What are you doing up at this time?” he asks, while looking my outfit up and down. It’s obvious I’m not going to work with what I’m wearing.

“I could lie to you and say I was going somewhere, but the truth is I wanted to speak to you alone.”

His features instantly brighten at my words. “Harlan is still snoring so there is zero chance of him joining us. What’s on your mind?”

We start a gentle jog which is obviously for my benefit. I think the last time I did anything like this was during physical education in high school.

“We’re mature adults and we kissed so I think we should talk about it.” I’m addressing the issue head on, and it feels good to be direct. There is no avoiding this conversation, so we might as well chat about it so we can move on with our lives.

“Your brother would kill me if he thought I had more than friendly thoughts about you.”

“Do you have those kinds of ideas about me?”

I want to be crystal clear what’s going on between us. I know he’s worried about what my brother thinks. Was the kiss a mistake or is he worried about our friendship dynamics?

“I didn’t mean it in a sexual way.” He huffs and it’s nothing to do with the exercise we’re doing. “This is coming out all wrong.”

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