Page 14 of Last Summer

But she had killed someone. Their son.

Her chest clenches and a heavy sadness falls over her.

“Damien,” she says in a thin whisper as hot tears flood her eyes. She waits for him to look her way, and when he does, her face crumples. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

He frowns. “For what?”

“I killed our baby.” Tears fall.

Damien’s expression softens. “No. No, no, no.” He crosses the kitchen and gathers her in his arms. “It was an accident.” He cups the back of her neck and presses his lips to her forehead. “A horrible accident.”

“I wish I remembered.” She coils her arms around his waist and tucks her head under his chin and whispers, “I’m scared.”

“Me too. But we’ll get through this. I promise.”

Damien leans his cheek on the top of her head and draws his arms around her, careful not to hold her too close because of her fresh scar. For a long moment they stand there like that, arms wrapped around each other, gently swaying. She listens to the rain pelt the window. His heart thumps under her ear, and slowly, her limbs grow heavy and the steady rocking lulls Ella toward sleep.

The kettle whistles and Ella startles.

Damien kisses her head, then turns to the stove. He slowly pours the water over the ground coffee in a swirl motion. The grounds bloom like a balloon and the water steadily drips into the mug.

Ella yawns and bundles her sweater tighter. “How’d the accident happen?”

He adds cream to her coffee and gives her the mug. “Some guy in a truck T-boned you at Jones and Filbert. Pushed your Range Rover head-on into a telephone post.”

She gasps. She knows that intersection. Drives it almost every day. “Was he heading toward the bay?”

He nods. “He claims his brakes failed. The police are investigating.”

That section of Jones Street has one of the steepest grades in the city. With the downhill momentum, he would have slammed into her hard. She mentions this to Damien.

“Witnesses report him running multiple stop signs.” Damien tucks an errant cluster of hair behind Ella’s ear and cradles her jaw. He looks at her, finally meeting her eyes for the first time. “It wasn’t your fault, El.”

She nods but finds it hard to believe him. Not because she doesn’t trust he’s telling her the truth. More because she feels guilty. She’s the one who got into the car and drove through the intersection. Why hadn’t she seen that truck coming?

“The police will want a statement from me.”

“They already took it.”

“I guess that’s a good thing, since I forgot what happened.” She isn’t trying to be funny, but the corner of Damien’s mouth lifts. She answers with a weak smile.

Damien retreats, putting space between them. He blinks a few times, then looks toward the window. He presses his fingers into the corners of his eyes.

“What is it?” Ella asks.

“I was just thinking about when the hospital called that night. I got there as fast as I could, but you were already in surgery. Placental abruption, that’s what the doctor told me. You were bleeding and they couldn’t detect Simon’s heartbeat. By the time they let me see you—” He stops abruptly and looks around, unfocused. There’s a tic in his jaw. “I’m going to shower. You should rest. Davie will be here in a few hours. She’s bringing dinner.”

And with that, he leaves. It feels like a dismissal, something she’d never expect from him.

The husband who brought her home from the hospital is not acting like the one she knew last week. Or even the man she met and tumbled into love with during their first night together.

Then again, with so many holes in her head, she isn’t the same woman either.

CHAPTER 4

Four Years Ago

Ella met Damien Russell on a cool February evening in Las Vegas. She’d recognized him immediately when he walked up to Lobby Bar at the ARIA Resort & Casino, where she and her best friend from college, Davie Mayer, were spending a long-overdue girls’ weekend.

---