Page 69 of No More Words

Lucas stands a couple feet behind Dwight. The old man chats up wine nonsense with a colleague. Lucas thinks of what happened to him while he was in juvie and how Dwight blew it off when Lucas confided in him.Deal with it, son.Lucas has been dealing with it. The memories, the torment, and the shame. Burying fists in his jacket pockets, he lets the anger that’s been simmering below the surface flare.

The elevator doors slide open, people pile in, and Lucas keeps his head ducked. He’s the last one to step inside. He turns his back to the elevator interior, faces the lobby, and waits with everyone for the doors to slide closed. The bell dings.

“Four, please,” someone behind him asks. Lucas pushes the button.

“Fifteen,” says another.

“Ten,” says Dwight, and Lucas slowly smiles. He obligingly pushes the button.

CHAPTER 25

Josh is in her studio, hunched over his panels, when Olivia arrives home. Only a few blank templates remain, he filled up most of them. His attention to detail is exquisite. It reminds her of his mom. Olivia would come home late from her dates with Ethan to find Lily awake, doodling with her colored pens. She was always creating a new comic. Furry little animals with big eyes and cute tails that made her and Lucas laugh. Cats, squirrels, raccoons. You name it, she drew it. Olivia would linger in Lily’s doorway. Deep in the zone, Lily never knew she was there, how Olivia debated asking why they weren’t as close as they used to be. Had Olivia done something to drive a wedge between them? She wishes she’d asked, but was too afraid she’d realize the fault was her own.

Olivia flips the corners of Josh’s panels like pages in a book. Her thumbnail snags on a panel. She slides it from the stack. It’s a profile of a woman with bright red hair and a young boy in a car. Huddled off to the side is a group of women. They watch the woman and boy. “Is this you and your mom?”

Josh lifts his head from his work. He wiggles a pencil between his fingers. “Yes.”

Olivia studies Lily’s profile. It’s only a drawing, but strange nonetheless to see a more current rendering of her sister. She’s beautiful in Josh’s eyes. But she’s also angry. Her brows dip low. There’s a crease between them. Josh stares out the window, scowling like the teenager he is.

“Where are you here? What’s happening?”

Josh points at the building he drew. It looks like a gymnasium. He gestures at his desk. “Like this.”

Olivia tilts her head. Gym. Desk. “Is this your school?” She takes a guess and he nods. “Is your mom dropping you off?” He nods again. “Why’s she angry?”

He thumbs his chest. “At me.” His gaze drops to the desk. “Forgot stuff. Didn’t hear ... listen. Started.” He waves his arm around the room.

“Are you saying this is when everything started?”

He shakes his head. “I ... started it.”

“Josh. Hey.” She crouches beside him. “Look at me. This isn’t your fault.”

He shrugs listlessly.

She touches his arm, wishing she could come up with a stronger argument so he didn’t blame himself. But she doesn’t know how he and Lily separated and why it happened in the first place.

“Everything will work out. You’ll see.”

Josh shrugs again and goes back to his drawing.

Olivia pushes to her feet. “I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me.”

Amber’s at the table dipping carrots in hummus. A book is open on her lap. She drags her feet off the chair she was using as a footrest and sits up when Olivia enters the kitchen. “How’d it go?”

Olivia digs out her prize and plunks the Rolodex on the table. “I stole it from my dad’s office.”

Amber snorts. “That was productive.” She flicks through the cards. “Man, I haven’t seen one of these in years.”

“My mom came back. I didn’t have a chance to get anything I wanted.” She thinks of the empty thumb drive in the side pocket of her purse.

“I can’t believe you’ve gone all Charlie’s Angel on your dad.” Amber frowns. Olivia told her earlier what she was after at her parents’ house. “I don’t see Lily in the Cs or Ls.”

Olivia isn’t surprised. She grabs a flavored S. Pellegrino from the fridge and pops the top. “I think she changed her name,” she says, sitting beside Amber. She sips the spring water. “Josh has tried to tell me, but so far, no luck.”

“You’ve got a lot of calls ahead of you if you plan on reaching out to everyone in here.”

“Just the women in the San Diego area, if there are any.” She rotates the Rolodex. Most cards are female. Olivia recognizes many as Dwight’s clients or people he met campaigning, names Olivia has heard over the years.

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