Page 63 of Waiting for Redemption

“The night that everything happened, I was so worried that he would be just… absolutely traumatized. Ya know? But you want to know what he said to me?” Her eyes are glistening and I can tell she’s fighting back tears.

“He told me that you once said you would never hurt me, that you would protect me because I was one of yourimportant people,” she says, using air quotes. “He immediately assumed that what happened between us was an accident and after making sure I knew we were safe—the way I always do for him—he wassobummed that he didn’t give you the picture he colored.” The countless emotions I’m feeling right now are making my head spin. I’m sad that I disappointed Hendrix, I’m angry at myself for not getting help sooner—to keep that night from happening in the first place—and astounded at the way he handled things at his age. Most of all, I’m curious about howshefeels about all of this. Butwowis the only word I can force past my lips.

“Was it true?” she asks, biting on the inside of her cheek. “Was I one of your most important people?”

“No. Notwastrue.Itistrue.Youareone of my most important people, Honey.Always will be,” I correct, taking her hand in mine as she studies my face. “Would it be okay with you if we told him together? Just in case he has questions about where I’ve been lately?”

“Of course.” She smiles sweetly in agreement before confusion washes over her features. “So wherehaveyou been working? Since you left the bar?”

“I got a job as a personal trainer at Hall’s Gym.”

“I thought they were closing or something?”

“They had been talking about selling but I think one of their sons moved back to town to run it so they wouldn’t have to,” I explain, seeing the way her mind is somewhere else completely.

“Oh, good.” The emptiness in her response almost makes me laugh. Like her brain is on autopilot for this conversation.

“Come on, let’s go.” I offer her my hand as I stand from the couch.

“What? Where?”

“Well, if it’s alright with you, we’re going to go tell Hendrix what’s going on. I know it must be killing you every second that passes that you haven’t told him.” She smiles up at me gratefully. One thing I’ve always loved about Ruby’s relationship with Hendrix is that she’s always so honest with him. She doesn’t brush things off as unimportant when he asks questions, so long as it’s nothingtoomature for him to know about, she tells him. “ThenI’m taking you two out to dinner so we can put that hangry little beast back where he goes.” I boop her nose and she rolls her eyes, but the sweet smile beneath tells me she’s not really mad.

“Are you sure? I mean, I know we still have a lot to talk about,” she asks hesitantly. I see the way her nerves are starting to take over, so I do what I’ve always done and lean in to kiss her forehead. Not missing the way her eyes fall closed as she releases a more steady breath.

“Look, we’re about to have all the time in the world to catch up on current events. Let’s go talk to Hendrix now.” I see the relief on her face as she lets out a breath.

“Okay.”

“And Ruby, never second guess my willingness to be by your side, you hear me?” She nods in agreement as curiosity sparks behind her eyes.

Good.

I want her to wonder if my words hold a deeper meaning. Because she’ll find out soon enough what every last one means. No more staying away. No more uncertainty. When the storm finally settles, she’ll know just how much marrying her isn’t me doing her a favor, butusfinishing what we never got the chance to start.

“It alright with you if Mav comes?” I ask, nodding to where he’s sitting by the door waiting for us.

“Of course it is.” She smiles over at him, making him tilt his head at her again.

* * *

Being back at Ruby’s house isn’t as hard as I thought it would be. I assumed I would be flooded with horrible flashbacks of that night, and that I wouldn’t be able to shake the gut-wrenching feeling of failure, but I’m not. I remember the night vividly, of course, but that twisted part of my mind isn’t in control anymore. I’m able to remember and regret the things that happened without it sending me into a complete spiral, which is giving me the reassurance I needed to really take on my role here.

The only thing making me nauseous now is waiting for Ruby to get back with Hendrix from next door. I have no idea what to expect when it comes to how he will feel seeing me again. Will he still be angry? Will it be like no time has passed? Will he have a thousand questions, or will we be back to where we started when he didn’t speak to me at all?

My heart races faster as I hear them outside the front door. I love this kid, man. I can’t stand the thought of him hating me. When the door finally opens, I rub my sweaty hands against my blue jeans as I stand up from the table. Hendrix freezes in the doorway and blinks a couple of times as if he’s letting his eyes adjust. Then my heart completely stops at what he does next.

“Tank! You’re back!” he yells, running over to me. His arms wrap around my legs and I feel tears immediately flood my eyes. I really thought he was going to hate me.

“Hey, buddy, it’s good to see you.” I do my best to keep my voice from wavering, but I fail. Ruby stands still in the entryway as tears fill her eyes, a look of shock painted on her face.

“Are you feeling better?” He pulls away staring straight up at me, I look at Ruby for further explanation but she shrugs in confusion.

“What do you mean?” I bend to his level, hoping he’ll give us both a little clarification.

“Uncle Tucker told me that you had to go away for a while because you needed help to feel better. That’s why I didn’t see you for so long.” He grabs my face in his hands, moving one hand from my cheek to my forehead. “So do you feel better now?” I’ve never wanted to thank my brother for sticking his nose where it didn’t belong more than I do right now.

“I do, buddy. I feel a lot better. Thanks for asking.” I smile at him, and he smiles back—showing off two lost teeth.

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