Page 62 of #Starstruck

I’d grown so attached to Chase in such a short amount of time, I didn’t think my heart could take it if I lost him, too.

CHAPTER TWENTY

“So where’s your second favorite place?” Chase asked. We were in the parking lot of my apartment complex. When we left the reception, we’d been chased by the paparazzi for about half an hour, but Chase finally lost them on the freeway. I thought he would just drop me off, but we’d been sitting in his car for hours, talking and carefully kissing. Neither of us felt ready to push our boundaries again, so his kisses were soft and playful and tender.

Which turned out to be almost as dangerous as his passionate kisses, given what they were doing to my heart.

“Paris, France,” I promptly responded, making him laugh.

“Well, Miss No Passport, that’s not a possibility. But I will take you there someday. We’ll climb the Eiffel Tower, walk next to the River Seine at twilight ...” He laced his fingers through mine, and I sighed. Both at the imagery of us being together in the most romantic city in the world and because I didn’t think I’d ever get over the electricity that sizzled through my blood every time he touched me. “But what about Vegas?” His eyes didn’t quite meet mine.

“Vegas?”

“We could fly there, get married in one of those little white chapels on the Strip, spend a week in a suite, and get it annulled when we get back.”

My stomach sank at his words. He didn’t get it. It wasn’t about a technicality. It was about being committed to someone so thoroughly that I knew I would love and trust him for forever. I got that he couldn’t understand my perspective, since it would be so foreign to someone like him. He thought he’d found a loophole that would allow us to be together. He’d already let me know he thought marriage was disposable and unimportant.

“My grandparents were married for over fifty years. My mother and stepfather had the most incredible marriage before he died. I’ve been surrounded by good examples that showed me how important marriage and those vows are. I could never treat them so lightly.”

“Worth a shot, right?” He winked at me, and I felt better. Even if I’d disappointed him, he wasn’t sulking or getting angry with me, like some other guys had when they’d realized I was serious about this celibacy thing. “But you didn’t answer my question. Where else do you love to go?”

“The Marabella aquarium. My grandma had season passes, and we went there almost as often as we went to the beach. It made me love the ocean.”

“How did she die?”

“She got breast cancer and didn’t find out until it was too late. She waited until she’d been admitted to the hospital to tell us. It all happened so fast. My grandpa died a year later. I know dying of a broken heart’s not supposed to be a real thing, but I believe it.” Especially now that I’d had a little taste of what it felt like to have serious feelings about someone. “And my mom and Duncan moved into their little bungalow after my grandparents died. Sometimes I think they did it for me. So I would miss them less by being where they’d raised me.”

“I’m sorry.” He breathed the words against my lips just before he kissed me and made me forget what I was talking about. He broke away to add, “I can’t believe you thought I wasn’t interested in you. I thought I’d made myself pretty clear.”

“Muddier than swamp water in Louisiana,” I told him.

“Not wanting to push things too far wasn’t the only reason I waited,” he said as he reached up behind my head to undo my bun and let my hair fall loose. He started massaging my scalp, and it took all my willpower not to purr in response. “In the program they tell you to wait a year before you start dating. I met you online at exactly the one-year mark. My therapist and my sponsor thought I could start dating again.”

“You thought your best bet was to find a fan and date her? What if I’d been psychotic?”

“Then I wouldn’t still be here.”

“Oh, you would be. Tied up in my basement.”

He laughed and pressed a kiss against my eyelid that made my stomach go all fluttery. “But my therapist warned me to go slowly and to date like it was 1955.”

I opened my eyes to give him a pointed, teasing look. “You’ve totally failed. We haven’t been to a single sock hop or drive-in, and we haven’t shared even one milk shake.”

“That wasn’t what she meant.” He shook his head, smiling at me tenderly. “She wanted me to go glacier slow. To not trade one addiction for another. Problem is, I think I was already addicted to you long before I kissed you.”

Another gentle, quick kiss. “Does that mean you’ll have to go to Zoe rehab?”

“I don’t ever want to get you out of my system.”

My heart started to race not only from what he’d said but also because I wanted to ask him something. “So, are we dating? Are we exclusive?” Because the thought of another woman touching him filled me with a slightly murderous rage.

He studied me seriously, tracing my jawbone with his thumb. “I haven’t been with any other woman for a very long time. I can’t even imagine wanting to. But that’s going to come down to you trusting me. To not believing tabloids or online gossip. I’m not the cheating type, no matter what they say to sell content. If you ever have any doubts, please talk to me first.”

“I will. And I already told you. I do trust you.”

OMG, Chase Covington was myboyfriend. The fourteen-year-old girl in me fainted with delight. A much older-sounding voice reminded me that he hadn’t committed to anything. He’d only said he didn’t cheat and “couldn’t imagine” being with anyone else. That didn’t mean he wouldn’t.

I told her to shut up and stop ruining this for us.

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