Page 88 of #Starstruck

“Not everybody loves me. Gavin broke up with me.”

What?“Why?”

“He thinks I’m in love with Chase, and that’s why I was mad at you. I kept trying to explain it to him, but he’s so stubborn. It’s like he decided this was reality, and there was nothing I could say to make him see things differently.”

Boy, did I know how that felt.

“But it’s okay. There are lots of other guys to date. Maybe we should go out and find some.” She smiled and said the things she always said after a breakup. But she wasn’t okay. Gavin was special. She loved him.

“Maybe. We can talk about it later. I’ve got to get to my women’s studies class. It’s our last one. We’re having a discussion on the true meaning of feminism.”

Lexi wished me luck. I ignored the reporters waiting downstairs for me, who followed me all the way to campus. Fortunately, security stopped them from coming onto school grounds, but they couldn’t stop them from yelling and snapping pictures and making everybody in the area stare at me.

I felt like an animal in a zoo.

When I got to my women’s studies class, I avoided eye contact with every other student in the discussion circle. I was so tired of being scrutinized and not being able to go through my breakup in private.

Professor Gonzales came in and took her seat. “So, let’s get into it. What is the true meaning of feminism?”

“Equality.”

“What kind of equality?” the professor asked.

“All kinds. Social, economic, political, religious.”

“It should mean we stop telling girls to not be too smart or too ambitious because men won’t like them,” someone to my left offered.

“It means we fight for our causes and our rights.”

Then the sweater-set sorority girl said, “I’m sorry, but are we really not going to talk about what happened to Zoe?”

My head snapped up. “That’s none of your business.”

“The fact that the media is portraying you as a whore and a home-wrecker when you told us you’re celibate? It’s untrue and reiterates the whole virgin–whore paradigm.”

At some point I had to run out of tears, right? “I don’t want to be recorded and have anything I say end up online.”

“Not a problem.” She stood up and grabbed her bag. “Everybody give me your cell phones. And if you can’t keep your mouth shut, leave now.” She looked specifically at me. “And by the way, my name is Tiffany.” No one left, and they all turned over their cell phones.

They asked me questions that didn’t venture into anything too personal, just the true facts of the situation I had experienced. And that led to a discussion of how I was being vilified in the media even though I’d done nothing wrong. How Amelia Swan had gained sympathy and popularity on the back of another woman—me.

Every comment made after that was complimentary and supportive. They were all on my side, even the guys, and it made me feel understood and heard in a way that healed another piece of my heart.

“This is feminism,” I told my professor. “A sisterhood of women who stand up for one another, support one another, and know that they’re stronger together.”

Professor Gonzales smiled and nodded. She announced that class was over, and Tiffany redistributed our phones. I realized that although I’d carried it with me and charged it, I hadn’t yet turned it on. I was almost afraid to.

“If you need to talk to someone, you can call me,” Tiffany said as we went into the hall. She handed me a piece of notebook paper with her phone number. I felt bad that I had dismissed her and judged her when she was obviously a kind person.

“Thanks.”

That class discussion had made me think of Lexi and how my breakup with Chase was more bearable because now I knew she was there for me.

She needed her own happy ending, and as her “sister,” it was my job to help her get it. I had my girl’s back.

Gavin’s apartment was north of campus. When they’d first started dating, Lexi wanted to set me up with one of his roommates. She’d taken me to his place, but we were not interested in each other. I banged on the front door. If Gavin wasn’t home, I would wait until he got back.

I hoped somebody answered before the paparazzi found me.

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