Page 108 of #Moonstruck

“I’m trying,” I told her. “But I feel like this horrible, selfish brat.” No wonder Ryan got over it so quickly.

“You are an emotional, fiery artist and a wonderful daughter and sister and friend who made a mistake. You are allowed to make those. You’re human, after all.”

I knew she meant well, but it didn’t really help.

About twenty minutes later, we arrived at the airport. I hugged her goodbye and promised to text or email or whatever I could do when I was overseas. I grabbed my brand-new passport as I jostled my way through the crowd. This would be my second time on a plane, my first going out of the country.

Thinking about flying made me remember the first time I’d been on a plane. After I’d walked out on Ryan. A thousand sharp icicles pierced my heart, and I nearly doubled over from the pain of it all.

I found my brothers waiting for me next to the computerized ticketing station of our airline. They all looked at me warily, most likely not sure what I would say or do. I hadn’t talked to them since the vote at Fitz’s apartment, when they’d tried to help me see the reality of my situation.

Better to admit to the truth up-front than let this thing drag out. I set my Martin guitar case down. “You guys were right. I messed up and was a total idiot with Ryan.”

All three of them grinned in unison.

“You should apologize to him,” Parker said. “Someplace private where none of us will be forced to watch.”

“Yes. I don’t want to see Maisy groveling,” Fitz agreed, putting his arm around me.

Parker nodded. “There is something fundamentally weird about that image.”

“You guys are crazy,” Cole interrupted their exchange. “I’d pay good money to see Maisy publicly admit she was actually wrong about something.”

I punched him in his arm, and he pretended to be wounded before winking at me.

“Come on,” Parker said. “Let’s get this new tour started. Tickets are this way.”

“So are you going to apologize to him?” Fitz asked me, keeping me close to his side as we followed our brothers.

“I already did. I texted him. He didn’t answer. So I guess that’s it, then. Chalk it up to a learning experience and move on. Right?”

Fitz looked thoughtful. “That surprises me. That doesn’t seem like something Ryan would do.”

I shrugged one shoulder to indicate he already had done it. “At least I’ll always have you guys.”

“You’ll always have us,” he agreed, but his voice sounded distant. Like he was thinking about something more important than this conversation. I saw Piper walking across the terminal, hips swaying as she smiled and waved at us. Fitz smiled lovingly, dropped his luggage, and ran across the airport. When he reached her, he picked her up and swung her around in a circle. Piper threw her head back and laughed before settling in to kiss him hello.

I did have my brothers and the band. For now.

But how long would that last?

CHAPTER THIRTY

“Why can’t I get this chord change? What’s wrong with me?” I asked.

“Hang on,” Cole replied, jumping up. “I gotta get my list.”

I laughed as he ran out of the room. We’d been on tour with Many Maus for about two weeks and were currently staying in an adorable bed-and-breakfast in the heart of Amsterdam. It was a beautiful city, with old buildings lining waterways and cobblestone sidewalks. Sunlight beamed in through the open wooden shutters, lighting up the entire third floor.

Parker walked past my room while reading his phone. “Did you guys see this review? The actual music critic liked us, but the commenters are vicious.”

“Don’t let the trolls win,” I called after him. It was something else I’d figured out recently. I’d been so reluctant at every step of my relationship with Ryan because of my parents and my fears of what I felt for him both physically and emotionally. But those internet voices? The ones who disparaged me and said we’d never work, the same ones I’d claimed I didn’t care about and didn’t listen to? I did care, and I did listen. I let total strangers make me doubt myself and doubt Ryan.

Never again.

“Hey, Cole?” I heard Fitz call from another room. “Remember we have that thing right now. You coming?”

Thing? My brothers hadn’t mentioned any plans.

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