Page 92 of #Moonstruck

“I don’t know. Let’s find out.”

The tide of the internet turned in my favor after the awards show. Skyler had so many Twitter feuds with so many different celebrities that nobody paid her much attention. The consensus seemed to be that she came off as desperate and pathetic while I, by maintaining my silence, seemed classy.

The comments on the YouTube video of Ryan singing to me had also changed in their tone.

I did know I was the luckiest girl in the whole world. With the awards show over, Ryan and I traveled back to meet the rest of the crew and continue the tour. On the way, I helped him with his revenge prank on Cole, which involved a ton of Ping-Pong balls being stuffed into his bunk and held in place by industrial-strength plastic wrap.

Cole was not happy, but it was really hilarious. I then asked both sides for a cease-fire because I knew how quickly this could escalate.

As we traveled to new cities and new stadiums and arenas, something funny started to happen. People knew the words to our songs. Our downloads increased dramatically, as did our video views. We even got rid of one of the covers from our set list and replaced it with another original song.

Bloggers and magazines started calling us for interviews. In every single one, Parker and Cole were relentlessly charming and hilarious, which everyone seemed to respond to. At the venues, people were waiting to meet us, wanting our autographs. Girls even screamed and jumped up and down for my brothers, which I still did not get.

On top of everything else, Ryan’s “Be With You” video dropped and earned the highest number of views in a single day ever.

One fan. Skyler Smith could kiss my butt.

After sound check at the venue in Chicago, Ryan and I were hanging out in his dressing room, cuddling on the couch. They had insisted he do a meet and greet. I listened as he told me all the reasons why he didn’t like doing them. Then in the middle of his monologue, he interrupted himself.

“Do you ever think about the future?”

“Um, all the time. I worry about my mom, mostly.”

He held up my hand, studying it. “I mean a future for you and me.”

My pulse exploded, skittering frantically underneath my skin. Because, no, I hadn’t. I’d been living day to day, taking things as they came. I didn’t think about tomorrow when it came to Ryan.

“Have you?” I asked.

“It wasn’t something I ever considered before, but recently I’ve been thinking about things like getting married.”

I think I blacked out for a second because he couldn’t possibly have just said what I thought he said.

Could he?

“What?” I whispered.

“I think I’d like to have kids. A big family, like yours.”

It was like my entire body had turned into one giant heartbeat, drumming so hard I couldn’t hear or think. In my life rules, the unspoken Rule #3 was “Never marry a musician.” How could I marry and have a family with someone who would always be gone? Who would always have to deal with an unending horde of women who would constantly offer themselves to him?

“Any thoughts?”

I was glad we were both facing the same direction and he couldn’t see my panicked expression. I gulped. “When I think about the future, it’s mostly about making the band work out. I don’t have to be famous. I just want to make enough money so we can earn a living from it without having to do crappy second jobs. And still take care of our mother. I’ve honestly never thought about marriage. Ever.”

“Really? Never?”

“I’ve thought about it in the abstract sense. But it terrifies me. The same way that becoming intimate physically terrifies me. I’ve never wanted to care that much about someone. Never wanted to give a man that kind of power over me that he could destroy me the way my dad destroyed my mom. I joke a lot about my overprotective brothers driving guys off, but the truth is that I’m the one who drives them off.”

The silence between us felt physical. Like it was shaping itself into a wedge and setting between us.

“So not only am I the first man you’ve let yourself care about but also the first one you haven’t tried to scare away.”

I nodded.

He turned me on my side so I could look up and into his eyes. “Maisy, you do realize that whatever power or control you think I have over you, you have that same kind of control and power over me. I could never hurt you because I would only be hurting myself. I’m not your father, and you’re not your mother.”

There was a knock at the door, telling Ryan it was time for the meet and greet.

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