Page 19 of Hypnotized By Love

Loved.Past tense. My heart clenched.

He’d had feelings for me?

Was that why he’d spread that rumor? He’d somehow mistakenly thought I didn’t feel the same way about him, so he’d lashed out at me as some kind of petty, immature vengeance?

My head was spinning, a million different emotions whipping through me so quickly I didn’t have time to figure out what I was feeling. I needed to put all that aside, though, and concentrate on the session.

If for no other reason than to prove to myself that I could be professional with someone who made me feel anything but.

I talked to him about what this place would represent for him, how he could return here when he was feeling overwhelmed or stressed. That it was safe, his sanctuary, and no one else could be there unless he invited them in.

Now that we’d established a safe place for him, I asked him where he felt it in his body when he said no to things.

“My chest.”

I instructed him to imagine pulling those feelings from his chest—the ones that always said no, the parts that were afraid to experience things—and wrapping them up into a ball in front of him.

“What does it look like?”

“A rolling storm,” he said.

“Drop that ball into the rowboat, letting it float away on the water. You don’t need those feelings. Something interferes with your ability to say yes to things. A feeling. As that rolling storm drifts away from you, can you see what that feeling is?”

He waited for a few beats and then said, “Yes. Fear.”

Interesting. I never would have pegged Mason as a fearful person. Mostly because he had so much unearned overconfidence that it hadn’t ever occurred to me. “What are you afraid of?”

“Different things. I’m afraid of being used. My last girlfriend didn’t care about me and used me.”

This ... felt like information I shouldn’t have. She’d used him? How? Why? It didn’t really matter in the current situation, but I wanted to know more, and I wasn’t sure where that impulse came from.

“What do you need to soothe that rolling storm? To conquer that fear?” I asked, edging away from my nosiness about his love life.

He didn’t answer for so long that I thought he’d fallen asleep. Then he said, “To be seen and loved for who I am.”

That felt very insightful, and was the sort of thing someone might say in their fourth or fifth session with me. I again allowed myself the possibility that Mason was screwing around, but instead of saying as much, I went on with my usual dialogue, telling him things like his subconscious mind would listen intently and that he would overcome his fear and start to say yes. That it would feel good to say yes and he didn’t have to worry what others thought. “You are strong enough and confident enough to do the things you want to do.”

There was a split second where I thought about how honest and insightful he was being and wanted to ask him why he’d done what he had to me. Where things had gone wrong and why. Get him to explain when he would be truthful with me.

But that definitely would not be okay. This session was about him and his needs, not mine. Plus, his answer wouldn’t really matter or change things. What was done was done, and there was no going back.

I coughed slightly and then said, “Say yes. Try new things. See how good it makes you feel.” I paused and then, unable to help myself, added, “And call your mother more. She misses you.”

I thought he would have some kind of snarky comment in reply, but he didn’t say anything.

“Mason?”

No answer.

He had either fallen asleep or gone into a deeper state, something called profound, or hypnotic, somnambulism. If it was the first one, it wasn’t surprising that he’d come in here and pass out, but if it was the second, then that meant he’d be even more receptive to what I was telling him.

I’d never had a client go that deep before. But from what I’d been taught, I knew it was an opportunity to do more guided suggestions and positive reinforcement because he would be so much more receptive. I told him to remember times when he felt brave by saying yes, when he took risks and how powerful that would feel.

“It will be easier to say yes because you’re opening yourself up to new things and new possibilities. You will do things that scare you because you’re no longer going to allow fear to run your life.”

I gave him a few more helpful statements in anticipation of winding down and moving on to a proper awakening so that I could send Mason Beckett on his merry way.

But before I could begin the final stage, the building’s fire alarm wailed loudly, the shrieking sound piercing the air. I jumped out of my seat, my heart slamming wildly against my chest. I covered both of my ears and looked down.

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