Page 111 of Party Favors

Oh.

Oh.

I’d held on to the belief for so long that he was a womanizing playboy that I didn’t know what to do with this new information other than to explain where I was coming from. “This is more dysfunctional dad stuff for me. My dad used to cheat on my mom a lot and so I distrust men that I think are like him.”

Max gave me a small smile. “My dad was the same way, unfortunately. I’ve never been unfaithful to anyone I’ve been with, and I never would be.”

I believed him.

“But,” he added, “that wasn’t what I asked you. How are you feeling?”

I could feel a burning sensation at the back of my throat. Like I was trying to hold back tears. Max was so beautiful and so perfect that at some point he was going to realize he was too good for me. I was sure this was more residual stuff from my terrible father, but I couldn’t help my insecurity. Even if Max was being so wonderful. “I’m scared thatyou’re going to realize that you should be with your own kind. Like a racing stallion and a donkey would never date.”

“Huh. I’ve never been called a donkey before.”

My eyes were still watery, but that made me smile. “Obviously I meant it the other way around. If I tell you what I’m feeling, you’ll quickly realize that you’re too good for me and—”

He reached up to turn my face toward him, interrupting me. “Everly? You’re the one who is too good for me.”

“What?” I whispered, in total disbelief. Had he never seen himself in a mirror? Never read his own diary? He was an amazing person in an even prettier package.

“You always look for the best in others,” he said. “Why can’t you see it in yourself? Because I can. You’re smart, funny, kind, generous, thoughtful, and the most scarily organized person I’ve ever met.”

I laughed, but I could see the sincerity in his eyes next to the teasing.

He gently ran his fingers along the side of my face and then reached up to move a lock of my hair that had fallen over my shoulder back into place. “Why don’t you believe that you deserve good things?” he asked.

It was like he’d seen straight into my soul and uncovered something I hid from everyone else. Maybe even from myself.

That on-the-edge-of-tears feeling was back, making my throat tight. “Probably because they’ve been in short supply my entire life.”

He nodded. “You expect things to end badly. I understand that because I’m in exactly the same boat. But I have hope that someday it won’t end that way.”

“I think that’s why I try to look at people and the world as being half-full—because deep down I’m convinced that it will always be half-empty.”

“And I probably played into that fear when I didn’t call or text you this week.” His voice was regretful.

Heart racing in my chest, I pushed myself to be braver. “You did. But to be fair to you, I had told you that I wanted us to be just friends.”

His expression turned neutral. “And now? Is that still what you want? Because I want you to choose what you want.”

I gulped hard. “What if ... what if one of the things I choose is you? If you’re interested.”

His smile could have powered the entire New York City skyline. “If I’m interested? What do you think I’ve been doing this entire time?”

“Being my friend?”

He brought my hand up to his mouth to press a gentle kiss against it. “Everly, I love being your friend. And ...”

Max left the rest of that sentence unspoken, hanging in the air between us. Why didn’t he finish it? Was he scared? Worried? Not quite where I was?

It seemed like he was leaving it to me to spell things out, so I did. “I want to take the next step with you. I mean, if you want that, too.”

“The next step?” He grinned. “I already hurled myself down the entire flight of stairs. I’m more than ready for the next step.”

I slapped him on the shoulder. “Then why are you torturing me? If you wanted to be more than friends, why didn’t you just say something? I only said it because I was worried you would friend-zone me and I didn’t want to be humiliated. Especially if you were the womanizing player that I had imagined you to be.”

“Maybe I should have said something before. But you said you didn’t have much experience and I wanted to take things slow.”