And it does help, a little, just as I’m sure Sarah intended.
“Tatum,” Lucy starts, empathy written all over her face.
“Tate,” I interrupt in a wobbly voice. “You guys can call me Tate. Unless you don’t want to. But that’s what my friends from college call me. And Erik—” My voice cracks.
“Tate,” Lucy amends. She squeezes my hand. “How much time you’ve known Erik doesn’t matter. Emotions don’t work on a timeline. Sometimes it takes longer to develop them, and sometimes they hit you right up front.”
“Like the first time I met Matt,” Isla adds. “Even though it was at the craziest time, and he lived hours away, I wished something could come out of it. I’d never felt that kind of connection before.”
“That’s how I felt about Erik.” I sniff again, and a tissue magically appears in front of me. I glance up to see Xavier standing beside the couch, a tissue box in one hand and his phone in the other. Tiny Alice is nestled in a sling against his chest, making the cutest little humming sound as she sleeps.
He flashes me a sympathetic smile. “Lots of practice,” he says, angling his chin at the tissues. “Being around three pregnant women, and especially Luce during the first trimester… I just started making sure we had tissues in every room.”
“Xavier,” Lucy scolds lightly, but she’s smiling as she says it. “I didn’t crythatmuch.”
“You’re right,” he agrees quickly. But it’s clear from his expression he doesn’t agree. Turning to me, he adds, “Anyway. There’s nothing wrong with worrying about Erik. Although I promise you, he’s fine.”
“I know.” With all the attention on me, I can’t help feeling self-conscious. And a little foolish, as well. Everyone else seems just fine, not worried at all. While I’ve spent the last thirty-six hours a nervous wreck.
“I’m glad,” Xavier continues. “That Erik has you to worry about him. Not that we don’t. But it’s different. He deserves tohave someone who puts him above everyone else.” He pauses. “Shit. That’s none of my business.” A beat later, he grimaces. “And I just cursed in front of Alice. Again. I need to get better at that.”
But I don’t mind what Xavier said. And despite the short time, Idofeel like that about Erik.
“It’s fine,” I assure him. “You’re right. Erik does deserve that. To have one person who makes him their first priority. And?—”
“They just came through the gate,” Hawk announces as he walks into the room. His usually solemn features are bright with a smile. “So everyone can stop worrying.”
Everyone in the room sags in relief.
My heart jumps. Skips. Anticipation floods through my body.
Erik.
He’s back.
I can finally put my fears to rest once and for all.
Assuming…
Well. Even if he’s injured, it can’t be that badly. Or he wouldn’t be able to come home yet. He’d still be in the hospital, and someone would have told me. Right?
Ugh.
Stop worrying.
Belatedly, I realize my jaw is clenched tight and my features are tense with worry. One hand is plucking nervously at the upholstery of the couch, and my right leg is jittering madly.
I don’t want Erik to see me like this. I don’t want him to think I can’t handle his job. Because if this relationship is going to work, I’m going to have to get used to it. I’ll have to figure out a way to deal with the stress. After all, the last thing I want is for Erik to be off on a dangerous job, distracted because he’s worrying about me back at home.
As I forcibly relax my jaw and command my legs to stay still, a rumble of voices comes from the hallway.
I lean forward, listening for Erik’s voice.
My heart beats faster.
And then.
I see him.